Gossip Girl: A Royal Scandal

Gossip Girl:
"Never Been Marcused"

I've been getting crazy excited all week for tonight's new episode of Gossip Girl. I've read in multiple sources that episodes 2 and 3 of the second season are amazing. And, wow, episode 2 did not disappoint.

Before we get to the episode, I want to announce that I've decided to institute Headband Mondays in honor of GG and Blair Waldorf. I rocked a lovely dark purple band with a cloth flower on it today. Who's with me?

This episode was hilarious. Even though the promos ruined the Marcus's-stepmom-is-Nate's-girlfriend-reveal, it was still so much fun to watch the full extent of the scandal reveal itself. I actually liked Serena again while she was reacting to Blair's foot-in-mouth moments and trying to keep Blair from realizing the full awkwardness of the Blair/Nate/Catherine/Marcus situation. Her efforts were in vain, however, because Blair walked right in on the truth of the matter (which took the form of Nate and Catherine sprawled on the floor of the library) and uttered, "Oh my effing God," the phrase made infamous by Gossip Girl promotional materials. Leave it to Blair Waldorf to walk in on a horrific situation and immediately figure out a way to use it to her benefit.

There were some downright classic lines in this episode. So many, in fact, that I just want to watch it again and again on a continuous loop ;-)

Standouts and observations:

• Doesn't Serena feel slutty having to cover up her bra with her Grandpa's coat from the '70s?
• S and D broke up for "many reasons"? Really? Can someone name one? I guess I remember some of the reasons that they broke up for the first time in last season's finale, but the reasons they broke up for the second, third, and fourth times were completely lost on me.
• Blair: "He's a lord, and I love him."
  Serena: "OK...but, Blair, 'love'?"
  Blair: "Like very much--and not just because Tom Hanks gave him a Kleenex at Lady Di's funeral."
• Blair: "Squash? I'll squash you."
• Blair called Chuck "Basshole" to his face ;-)
• Hey, Nate's had parental supervision all this time? Who knew?
• Why did Serena bring a big box of chocolate-covered strawberries to eat on the Jitney? Is that typical Jitney behavior? Because, where I come from, we don't eat chocolate-covered strawberries on the bus...
• Eew, I hope Marcus isn't sleeping with the duchess too. (OK, thankfully he's not.)
• One problem: if Marcus is the stepson of Catherine, why did they not seem to notice that both of them (and her husband/his father) were all at the White Party?
• Chuck: "Which is why I have to get to know him. No one is that perfect. Once I get him outta the way, I'll have a clear shot with Blair."
  Nate: "Oh, you know it's love when you start talking like an assassin."
• Ohhhhhhh noooooooooooooo, it's Vanessa...
• They turned their storage space into a cafe? Do they have the necessary permits and licenses for selling food? This is pretty stupid; how much storage space did they have?!
• Yea! We get to see the squash match!!! Chuck Bass working up a sweat and panting! Between that and all the stealthy scheming, there was a big smile on my face throughout that whole scene...
• Hey, you know what the irony of all this Blair-wants-to-be-British stuff is? Ed Westwick really is British. He could be rocking the British accent too.
• Doroda: "But those are your friends!"
  Blair: "Then invite strangers!"
• Serena: "Well, if you can't find common ground with a dictator, I don't know who can."
• Is Chuck selling his club and giving the money to Mrs. Archibald?! Awwwww! What a good friend he is.
• Ugh, Nate's talking to Vanessa. That really is a last resort.
• Wow, I'm super impressed that Nate figured out the Chuck loan situation so quickly! He's not usually this smart.
• Whoa, quite the classy/boring shindig Blair and Doroda threw together.
• Blair: "Dan! Come meet the lord!"
• Oh, Vanessa's homeschooled. That explains so much. Like why she's always around. And never doing anything school-related.
• I don't think I even listen to Rufus when he talks at this point. At least not when he's talking to Vanessa.
• Gossip Girl: "What's this? Chuck's date and Blair's date are mother and son? And Nate and Blair are exes? And Nate and the mother are in a book club? Now there's a novel plot twist."
• Blair: "She made Waldorf rhyme with Spears! I may as well have gone commando and held my party at Nyla's Burger Basket."
• Um, at the rate Dan and Serena are going, Jenny's never going to get picked up at the train station.
• Nate: "But when the best version of the situation is that I'm going to become Blair's father-in-law, I think it's just time to move on."
• I thought Dan spent all summer making out with random girls? Based on the pictures, it seems like he spent an awful lot of time with Jenny.
• How did Nate think he was going to fix this all by himself? He's 17-years-old after all.
• Blair: "Oh my effing God!"
• Jenny: "Someone must think that his life is pretty fascinating..." (That's what I was saying last week!)
• Blair's smart keeping Serena in the dark regarding how she got the duchess to like her.
• Blair: "I think she recognized part of herself in me. Or rather, I recognized someone in her."
• "New York, I Love You" by LCD Soundsystem! Yea!

When Gossip Girl says, "Welcome home, Upper East Siders," I gotta say, I'm glad to be back.

Holy next week's promo, Batman! (Summary: There's a black out during a party, and Chuck says to Blair, "Have sex with me," and she says, "You are disgusting," and he says, "Then why are you still holding my hand?")

(photo: cwtv.com)