Premiere Watch '08: Chuck

Chuck:
"Chuck Versus the First Date"

During it's abridged first season, Chuck got increasing- ly better and better and offered up some tremendously enjoyable episodes (Marshall Flinkman as a gymnast spy, Rachel Bilson as an adorable sandwich maker, Bryce's return, etc.). After a very long, forced hiatus, it was fantastic to see that Chuck's return episode maintained its high standard of last season.

The cast is still across-the-board lovable, the constructs of the show still work, it's still funny, and it's still fun.

• Chuck: "You know what, it's never safe in the car!"
• Chuck portrays the NSA as one heartless bitch of a governmental organization. Chuck, an American civilian, does nothing but help them, and then they just want to off him as soon as the new computer comes online. That's harsh.
• Chuck's reaction to walking in on Ellie and Awesome in the shower was hilarious.
• Nooo, I don't want Chuck to move out of Ellie's place! I think it's sweet that they live together.
• Morgan's hair is looking good.
• Big Mike: "[The assistant manager is] the captain of the ship when I'm not around, which we both know is often."
• Sarah works at the frozen yogurt place now? That's neat. I really don't think she should be licking her fingers while she's serving ice cream though. That's gotta be a health code violation.
• Well, it should certainly help to have Sarah around when Casey comes to kill Chuck.
• Morgan has "a black belt in dumplings." That's my kind of person!
• Wow, Casey has a decontamination shower built into his apartment! Cool!
• Chuck: "Is that a Crown Victoria?"
• Go Casey!
• Chuck: "'Somebody order drive through?' Huh? Did you think that up when you were racing over to save us? Hey, maybe I'll say this after I crash into the restaurant!"
• Chuck (when Jeff starts trying to play footsie with him): "That's not called for, or welcome!"
• Chuck: "Of course you don't see anyone! Who do you think we are, the FBI?"
• Go Chuck! Repeating Morgan's specs (for laser tag or whatever it was; I missed it)--nice!
• Nice catch (of Chuck), Casey! Phew.
• Casey: "Yeah, I know, I catch you when you fall."
• Wow, when he was captured, Chuck handled the situation so well! It was nice to see him not screaming like a girl and deftly dealing with a problem that wasn't a technology issue.
• The song they played at the end was cool, but I don't know what it is.
• So who faked the Sipher thing? Casey? He did take it from Chuck, but he also got awfully close to killing Chuck for someone who knew the new Intersect was going to blow up.
• Lester is not a great assistant manager...
• Chuck: "I want out of Burbank...to--"
  Morgan: "Glendale."

Next week it's Chuck versus Julie Cooper Nichol! If that's what it's coming down to, the fate of the free world isn't looking good--Julie is scary!

Premiere Rating: 8.0/10

(photo: nbc.com)

Gossip Girl: Fashion Disasters

Gossip Girl:

"The Serena Also Rises"

So much television to blog, so little time! Just bullets for this one:

• It's fashion week!! Woohoo! Bryant Park!
• Blair's not wearing a headband!
• Dan: "Another day of reading, writing, and aristocrats."
• Little J's antics are so going to get her kicked out of school.
• When Serena said "Poppy," I thought she was talking about her grandfather. LOL. It seemed weird that she's going to trendy events with him. (And I assumed he was dead since Dan was wearing his jacket to the White Party.)
• Hazel! I was just wondering where she had been hiding. She was conspicuously MIA in last week's ep.
• Blair (to Chuck): "The only person with fewer friends than you is Dan Humphrey."
• Oh, Chuck, you should have seen Blair's refusal to accept your help coming. An embattled Blair never wants your help. She just gets angry and then says nasty things to you and then you get angry and post her secrets on Gossip Girl...we've been here before, people.
• Finally, someone else thinks Dan's stories about his life are boring!
• Ha ha ha, Chuck is going to be Dan's muse ;-)
• Dan: "I know we don't like each other. You think I'm a boring, sheltered nobody."
  Chuck: "I don't think of you."
• Dan: "I need to experience new things."
  Chuck: "Are you gay?"
• Wow, how I love scenes with Chuck and Dan together! Their report (or lack there of) is the great, untapped resource of GG.
• Hysterical Blair is hilarious. I think Doroda is terrified.
• Oh, poor Jenny. She just pisses Blair off even when she's trying to help.
• Dan just flat out offered himself up on a platter to be terrorized by Chuck. That was just stupid. Chuck told him he was bored! And we know the kid doesn't have hobbies.
• Dan: "Oh, and beer before liquor! ...How do you know so many twins? ...Oh, my feet are hot. Are your feet hot?"
• Oh, Chuck. Taking Dan's shoes and dropping him off in the middle of some sketchy part of the city just wasn't nice. I know Dan is annoying, but that was just mean. Not as mean as last week's Nair-tini, but it's getting pretty close.
• Gossip Girl's quoting Project Runway.
• Writer Guy: "Charley Trout, now that guy's interesting." The best fake name Dan could come up with for Chuck Bass was Charley Trout?!?! The boy needs to give up on writing ASAP--he's got absolutely no imagination!
• Ok, does everything Dan writes about literally have to happen to him exactly as it appears in the story? Can he not just use his imagination? Maybe try to make something up? He is a fiction writer for crying out loud.
• Hey, Jenny's finally wearing the dress that was on her dress-form a couple of episodes ago.
• Didn't this husband-buys-the-artsy-naked-photo-of-his-wife story line just happen on Lipstick Jungle? And, how embarrassed am I that I know that?
• Wow, Bart is such a tool to Chuck. No wonder Chuck gets poor kids drunk, takes their shoes, and strands them in the middle of the city.
• Holy crap, Dan punched the guy before he could even get to Chuck! (And Chuck looked a little turned on by it!)
• So all these famous people and socialites are skipping out on Marc Jacobs? I'm not buying it.
• AHHH! Dan and Chuck are in jail!
• Chuck opens up and tells Dan the truth about his mother, and Chuck-lovers all around the world go "Awwwwww" in unison. Turns out that Bart hates Chuck because his mother died while giving birth to him. Ahh, so much makes sense now. What a sad story.
• Ok, but the clothes aren't going to fit the socialites if they were fitted to the models. Even if they're all wear a size 0, the garments aren't going to fit correctly on a different body.
• The schemes just don't end with Blair. Geez. First the seats are switched, then the models are sent home, and now she puts S in the wrong dress! And I'm not at all convinced that Serena could fit into Jenny's dress. Jenny's pretty skinny.
• Serena's hamming it up quite a bit on the catwalk. Actual fashion shows are much less spunky.
• How did Jenny get her hair into that elaborate updo?
• When did Lilly have time to sleep with a college professor or even go to college at all? From the way I figure it, she had to have been on tour with Rufus at a pretty young age and then have immediately gotten married and had Serena.
• This background check stuff with Bart and Lilly is just screaming Caleb Nichol and Julie Cooper to me.
• This is the longest fashion show ever. Serena was out there standing at the end of the runway for about 10 minutes.
• Well, at least Dan still has some integrity. It was nice that he stood up to the creepy writer guy and kept Chuck's secret a secret.
• Wow, Serena really tries to be nice to people right until they try to apologize to her, and then she turns downright nasty. She's nice as pie for the first 50 minutes of the episode, but in the last 10 minutes, watch out! She did the same thing to Blair this week that she did to Dan last week.
• Serena: "I'm just tired of trying to hold myself back so that I don't outshine you." (Even though she was just being flat-out nasty by this point, S does have a point. She has gone out of her way at times in the past to stay out of Blair's spotlight.)
• Oh, Jenny, what are you doing? No one is going to hire a 16-year-old fashion designer who hasn't graduated from high school and has no formal design training!
• Gossip Girl: "Don't worry, B. The brightest stars burn out fastest. At least that's what I've heard. Waiting for a star to fall..." (Me too. Serena's getting way too big for her britches.)
• OH No!!! WHY ISN'T THERE A NEW EPISODE ON NEXT WEEK?!?! BOOO!

Even though Serena's the star these days, my allegiances still lie with Blair, so Headband Monday continues! Today's was black fabric with a twist from Forever 21:

(Gossip Girl photo: cwtv.com)

Premiere Watch '08: Brothers & Sisters

Brothers & Sisters: "Glass Houses"
I can't say that I was on pins and needles waiting for Brothers & Sisters to start up again, but they Walkers did suck me back in pretty quickly in this episode. Even when they're being whiny, the show is usually quite enjoyable.

• I'm glad Kitty made fun of Sarah's letter; it was extremely sappy.
• Ha! Nora really wrote it. Wait, Nora called herself "a friend to the world." Wow.
• I'm not sure I realized that Kevin was actually an employee of the Ojai company. I knew he did their legal work, but I didn't really think that he was getting paid.
• Kevin really shouldn't take all the Walkers to his boss' beach house. They'll wreck the place or burn it down or something.
• Oops, Paige and Cooper caught Justin and Rebecca in the act pretty easily. I'm surprised that Justin and Rebecca have managed to keep it a secret this long. They're a little pathetic.
• This beach house looks like the house in Weekend at Bernie's.
• Scotty: "I'd freak out too if I had random siblings popping up all the time."
• I just love Scotty. He's beyond adorable.
• Beautiful day or not, Tommy's always in a bad mood.
• The Walkers really did not seem to care that Justin is dating the girl they formerly believed to be their sister. Which is a little weird, because they seem to care a lot about most everything.
• Ha ha, Justin has to say that he broke the whale.
• Justin: "While we're telling the truth, I didn't break this damn whale."
• It's nice that people are finally calling Sarah on her crap. She can be really annoying.
• The problem between Sarah and Kitty is trust? I thought it was because Sarah doesn't understand how hard Kitty's life is. That's what Kitty said it was 10 minutes ago.
• Next week's promo: Kitty wrote a book and nobody knew about it? When did she have the time to do that? No wonder she was angry with Sarah for not finding the time to write the letter in a month.

Premiere Rating: 7.0/10

Premiere Watch '08: Desperate Housewives

Desperate Housewives: "You're Gonna Love Tomorrow"

• Well, the car crash made for a dramatic opening.
• Ok, Andrew definitely doesn't look 5 years older
• What happened to Lynette's other kids? In addition to evil Kayla, there was the other boy (whose name I forget) and Penny.
• There's something reassuring in knowing that Lynette's twins are just as annoying 5 years in the future as they were in the past/present.
• Edie: "Oh, you didn't know? I have a husband now."
  Susan: "Whose?"
• How did Gabby have these children? I thought that she couldn't have children after she fell down the stairs and had a miscarriage. That's why they used the maid as a surrogate (and then Carlos had an affair with her).
• Edie's husband has something cooking. I bet he married Edie just to have an "in" on Wisteria Lane.
• How did Danielle get a lawyer to marry her?
• I had a feeling that Mike wasn't dead. We're not that lucky. The reason they broke up is kind of interesting though. (More original than other TV breakups.)
• Susan's kid is supposed to be 5? He looks much younger than that to me.
• Who's the one person who should be afraid of Edie's husband? I'm going to cross my fingers and hope it's Lynette. (Ha ha, she annoys the heck out of me.)

It was an OK episode. I can't say I'm super excited about the 5 year time jump, but I'm not opposed to it either. I'd appreciate it if they'd play by the rules they set up for themselves though (Lynette's other kids, Gaby not being able to have children, etc.). I guess they are expecting that we've forgotten all about this stuff by now.

The award for the most horrible person of the night goes to Gabby for making her 4-year-old walk home behind the car. Not cool.

Premiere Rating: 5.0/10

Premiere Watch '08: Grey's Anatomy

Grey's Anatomy: "Dream a Little Dream of Me"

This episode felt over-long to me. It seemed like there was about an hour of medical content, and they tried to stretch it into two hours by rehashing a lot of the same emotional/non-medical stuff a few more times than was necessary. When the medical stuff wrapped up, there was still about 20 minutes left, and personally I was already over everything else. I wish networks didn't feel the need to premiere their shows with episodes that are twice as long as they should be (Bones, 90210, Heroes, Grey's Anatomy, The Office, etc., etc.). We've got a whole season with these people to look forward to, there's no reason to overdo it right out of the gate.

Speaking of overdoing it...what happened to Rose? Last year she was so vanilla and boring, but this season she's providing sarcastic commentary in the middle of brain surgeries, stabbing people with scalpels, and cracking the unfunniest kinds of jokes ("I'm carrying your baby, Derek."). Crazy, party of one... Thank goodness she's gone off to pediatrics now. Good riddance.

It was interesting that Seattle Grace has found itself demoted from the No. 3 teaching hospital to No. 12. Ouch. Now I realize that these doctors have a lot of sex and get distracted from their medical work a fair amount of the time and that there have been a few scandals (Denny's death, Burke's hand, etc.), but Seattle Grace has also performed what can only be a disproportionate amount of really cutting-edge, dramatic medical procedures. There was the bomb in the person's chest, the ferry boat accident, the people stuck on a pole, the guy encased in cement, the penis fish, the "pregnant" man, the conjoined adult twins, the person with toxic blood, the using viruses to kill brain tumors, etc., etc., etc. It seems like every third person who crosses through the doors of Seattle Grace has some kind of extremely rare/bizarre medical problem that receives some kind of extremely rare/bizarre medical treatment. And, a lot of the time, the doctors end up saving their patients. You cannot tell me that there are 11 other hospitals in the U.S. with this kind of a remarkable track record.

My only explanation for the No. 12 ranking is that somehow the review committee got wind of Izzie using hospital equipment to resuscitate the deer.

And, honestly, after the promos for the next episode--which suggest that the whole freaking roof of the hospital collapses in mid-surgery--Seattle Grace is going to be lucky if it can hold onto the No. 12 ranking.

I could also have done without the dream sequences, which I thought were weird because in only one of the cases was the person actually dreaming (Meredith dreaming Derek had been in an accident). Izzie was wide awake when she saw Denny (Again. Please, move on Izzie, please. It's been over two years since Denny's dying episode aired. It is time for Izzie and the show to get over it.) Christina, I guess, was the one who "dreamed" about her and Meredith as old people, but she wasn't asleep and she didn't seem to be losing consciousness at any other point despite having been run through by an icicle. (At least Old Mere and Old Christina were really cute, even if they weren't relevant to the plot.)

Things I did like:

• Sloan badgering Lexie about liking George.
• Meredith: "And they'll be Derek's kids, so they'll have perfect hair."
• Christina: "As you weigh your options, just consider the possibility of shutting the hell up."
• Hunt, the military doctor, was kind of cool. He was also kind of creepy though, what with randomly pulling the blinds and kissing people and all. And it was weird that they had all those doctors around and still allowed him--someone who is not on hospital staff--to treat Christina.

Premiere Rating: 5.5/10

Premiere Week '08: The Office

The Office:

"Weight Loss"

How sweet was Jim's rest stop proposal to Pam (complete with quite the hot kiss)? It's a testiment to this show that it can offer up some of the funniest material on television one minute and then conjure up a scene of real, genuine emotion the next. And its sweetness is never forced or heavy-handed (like Ugly Betty's premiere episode was).

This wasn't the funniest episode of The Office ever ("The Injury"), but it still had plenty of great moments:

• Ha! They're purposely eating lots of food before the contest starts so that they'll have more weight to lose.
• Jim can't believe that Michael doesn't say "That's what she said" after Dwight said "Hold it in your mouth if you can't swallow."
• Wow! Look at young Stanley!
• For an HR rep, Holly's not very politically correct, what with her lesbian jokes and all.
• I love that Holly still thought that Kevin was mentally challenged and got all upset when Angela called him an idiot.
• Michael: "Do you know what the number 1 cause of death in this country is?"
  Dwight: "Shotgun weddings."
• Jim: "Beer me five!" (That was a blast from the past.)
• Angela demanding to get married in a 1,000-year-old church in the continental United States.
• Andy is being soooooooooooooo sweet to Angela. Why? Why? Why?
• Kelly: "I swallowed a tapeworm last night."
• Ryan! I thought he was in jail. Ahahaha! He's the new receptionist!
• Jim's insistance on pointing out that Ryan's new-found devotion to community service is court-mandated.
• Andy: "This is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I haven't had a very hard life!"
• Ryan: "I wanted to saw I'm sorry for how I treated you the past two years. I was in my mid-20s...I don't think I ever really processed 9/11..."
• Oh no, the guy from Mad Men is kind of adorable... Don't stray, Pammy!
• Oscar and Dwight doing the Michael Klump impression too.
• Michael: "What makes her beautiful?"
  Ryan: "Everything. She's perfect." (I have never heard Ryan say anything so sweet!)
• Andy: "Andy Bernard does not lose contests--he wins them...or quits them because they're unfair."
• Oh no--Angela not accepting Andy's college a capella group performing at the wedding is a deal breaker!
• Stanley: "I'm going to take five days off anyway."
• Gasp! Toby! He broke his neck! Oh nooooo, poor Toby! He just can't catch a break.

Premiere Rating: 7.0/10

(photo: nbc.com)

Premiere Watch '08: Ugly Betty

Ugly Betty:

"The Manhattan Project"

Hmm, well, this wasn't my favorite episode of Ugly Betty ever. Probably because it focused so much on Betty, and she's become my least favorite part of the show. And because it was also so sappy.

I was literally gagging during Betty's conversation with Ignacio towards the end of the episode ("Growing up...that's what you're doing right now."). The episode was trying to be heartfelt, but it came off as heavy-handed and repetitious. If this it the kind of TV America Ferrera likes, no wonder she thinks Gossip Girl is too "mean." Frankly, as far as TV shows go, I'll take mean over sappy. It's far more entertaining.

Also, I guarantee you that Blair Waldorf is 30 times smarter than Betty Suarez. Renting an apartment, sight unseen? Seriously? What does a show featuring a young woman making such a silly decision teach girls? Gossip Girl might be mean, but at least its heroine isn't a freaking moron.

It was downright impressive how fast Betty dispatched both Henry AND Gio. (Boy, hasn't the main-character-has-a-choice-between-two-love-interests-but-picks-neither storyline become a cliche on TV these days?) Not that getting rid of them both in the first 2 minutes wasn't absolutely the right thing for the show to do, but dispatching so much of what last season was all about so quickly smacks of an admission that last season was a big waste of our time.

Other thoughts:

• Justin: "I was trying to put the 'U' in 'uniform'."
• "Kimmie" isn't very good at putting 2 and 2 together; I assume Betty's dad happened to mention the name of his daughter if he told her all those other things about Betty. And she should know his last name if she's his boss. Thus, put the first name with that last name, and there you go: Betty Suarez. I think perhaps Kimmie's lack of problem-solving skills might explain why she's hit this dead-end time in her life.
• The song they were playing when Betty first walked into the Player magazine office was soooo a Dick Casablancas song. Is it the one he played while ghost riding his car (and running over his foot)?
• One of Wilhelmina's favorite things is "Karl Rove." Ha, two funny Karl Rove allusions in one week.
• That apartment is huge! It must cost $4,000+ a month to rent that thing in Manhattan!
• The best part of Ugly Betty is when Marc and Willy just stand around and give each other evil looks.
• Amanda: "Marc wanted to see all the girls in bikinis."
• Hilda: "If push comes to shove, I'm ready to kick her ass. I've got my big ring on."
• Betty blowing a rape whistle when opening her apartment door on the intruders.

Premiere Rating: 4.0/10

(photo: ABC)

Greek: Gelato Politics

Greek:

Pledge Allegiance

I know I should be over it by now, but I'm contin- ually surprised with how smart and funny this show can be. The "a-ha" moment in this episode was the scene between Max and Casey in the Zeta Beta kitchen. It was just so well written, so funny, and so sweet.

This episode was strong, because the three main plots (Casey/Frannie power struggle, Kappa Tau pledges versus actives, and Evan blackmailing Calvin's boyfriend) were all firing on all cylinders.

And between the Frannie/Casey scheming on this episode of Greek and the intense political machinations on Gossip Girl the other night, I feel like I'm ready to take over the world.

• Ashleigh: "You can't stop smiling. It's like your face is broken!"
• Beaver: "Thanks, Spitter, you're the breast--I mean best!"
  Ben: "Good one, Beav."
• I just saw Beaver on an episode of Gilmore Girls playing Rory's jogger roommate's large boyfriend who Paris hated. I hadn't realized that he was Beav.
• Rusty: "Mail call. My pledge brothers are about to receive my package." (Oh, Rusty...)
• Max's hair was not good on first date night.
• Holy cow about that wine list! That stuff was pricey. I wonder how long until Evan blows through his trust fund and has to get a job leading campus tours with Ashleigh.
• No wonder Rusty and Ben are ticked off, I've never seen that one kid (who is supposedly in their pledge class) before in my life. He can't have been contributing much.
• Wow, these pledges are easily placated. They're that excited about camping out in the house? Suckers.
• Uh, which Shakespeare play are they going to be watching? Because most Shakespeare plays really are not that romantic.
• (Gasp!) They drank three bottles of $400 wine!
• Calvin: "I don't mind that you're poor. I'd just prefer that you not use the word 'lavish' again. It's weird."
• Casey: "The stereo only ejects CDs if the car's in reverse. It's good for the environment that way, I guess; it's a hybrid."
• Beaver: "They just mooned us."
  Cappie: "Yeah, everyone except for Rusty; he just showed his underpants."
• Max: "If you need to make a call, check with Brutus; he's wearing a Bluetooth headset."
• Casey: "She's Karl Rove with hair extensions." (I haven't heard a good comparison between a school girl and Karl Rove since The O.C. when Seth Cohen compared him to Taylor Townsend.)
• Ashleigh: "Mmm, gelato's way better that collages!"
• Pledge (about the loud yodeling music): "The cops ain't coming, man. They probably just think it's an Omega Chi party."
• They played "I Never" on Veronica Mars. But it was a drinking game. And it didn't get this heated.
• Aww, poor Casey, throwing water on Frannie was perfectly understandable, but she's not showing the best side of herself to Max.
• Casey: "I can't do it anymore, Max. I can't compete with Sarah. She was a world-saving Buddhist philosopher who died tragically young from cancer. Last week, I got visibly upset because someone dribbled coffee on my Entertainment Weekly."
  Max: "Well, nobody likes stains." (If it was the EW with Ed Westwick and Leighton Meester on the cover, I think Casey's anger was completely justifiable.)
• Casey: "You like me because I'm alive? Pretty broad criteria."
• Max: "Should we go finish that girl off?"
• Arrowhead: "Does free will even exist?" (I was wondering the same thing after puppet master Chuck played all the other Upper East Siders like fiddles on GG last night.)

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Premiere Watch '08: Heroes

Heroes: "The Second Coming" and "The Butterfly Effect"

Well, here we go again. I'm not going to lie and say I was at all bothered by the forced 8-month hiatus of Heroes. I took notes on tonight's 2-hour premiere episode for the sake of taking notes, but we all know that the only reason I'm still watching this show at all is because of actors I've loved from other, better shows: David Anders (Alias), Kristen Bell (Veronica Mars), Greg Grunberg (Alias) and now Francis Capra (Veronica Mars).

• Why did Claire think she could shoot Peter with a regular gun? Was she born yesterday?
• Eew, one Peter is enough. I don't need two.
• Ahh, Hiro, I have not missed you at all. Geez, Hiro acts like a 5-year-old. It's ridiculous. "My father left me a DVD before he died. It's about my destiny!!!!" Gag.
• Sylar: "That's all behind me now, like a long night after a bad taco."
• Wait, Maya still here? Crap.
• Mohinder: "I just hope I did the right thing." (I'm sure you didn't.)
• Hiro's dad: "In the wrong hands, this secret could destroy the world." Ok, yeah, great idea then, giving it to Hiro. If his aren't the wrong hands, I don't know whose are.
• Holy crap, this stuff is even stupider than when he was stuck in feudal Japan.
• Yep, Hiro has the precious formular for all of 10 seconds before it gets stolen. That's the very definition of "the wrong hands."
• Is future Peter shorter than present Peter?
• Wow, Mohinder just solved the whole mystery of why some people have powers in 10 minutes? The mystery his dad was working on for years and years? Please.
• Eagle Eye will never look as good as it does right now when it's held up next to Heroes.
• Eew, I so don't need to see Sylar digging around in Claire's brain.
• Hang on, if the cheerleader isn't like the other and can never die, why'd we spend the whole first season trying to save her (to save the world)? I guess that was a huge waste of time.
• Kristen Bell? Are you here? KB?
• Why does Future Peter talk like an 80-year-old Italian man?
• Now poor Grunberg's stuck in the middle of nowhere... (career metaphor?)
• I think I like Future Ando, what with stabbing Hiro and all.
• Is that Weevil?!
• Mohinder has super strength? My butt, he does.
• After one hour: Can't we call it a day? I so do not need to see another hour of this show.
• David Anders!!!!!!!!!!! Looking gorgeous as usual. With that 5 second clip of him, Heroes just bought themselves another hour of my time. Grrr.
• Mrs. Petrelli (to Peter): "You never were as smart as you thought you were."
• Oh, for crying out loud! Old Mohinder was hard to take, but New Mohinder is downright insufferable. Put on a damn shirt.
• Maya is falling for Mohinder's "I'm-not-wearing-a-shirt-and-can-climb-on-the-walls" act? She's even dumber than I thought she was.
• LOL at Grunberg going all bobble-heady in the dessert.
• KB!!!!!!!!! KB!!!!!!!!!! There she is!!
• Somebody needs to remind Hayden and Milo that their characters are supposed to be related. It's kinda getting gross.
• Nathan (sees Nikki): "Speaking of sin."
• OMG--Veronica and Weevil in the same scene!!! And she walked right past him! No, KB, help Weevil! You owe him. Or he owes you. It's hard to remember...
• Wow, watching Weevil/Peter yell at Sylar to leave Veronica/Elle alone seemed strangely fitting. If I shut off my brain just enough, it was almost like I was watching another, far superior show. It was nice.
• If Peter permanently turned into Weevil, I'd like Heroes a lot better.
• What are you supposed to do now, Elle, you ask? Find that "Peter" fellow, move to Neptune, buy him a motorcycle, and start solving crimes!
• Bet you're going to want to keep your shirt on now that your skin's melting off, Mohinder.
• Oh, thank goodness Grunberg didn't really just read the turtle's mind. I was about to turn off the TV.
• Hey, another guy who can paint the future, which is convenient because they killed off the other one of those.
• So Nathan is being haunted by Linderman now? That's just aces.
• I don't think there's been a scene with Claire yet that hasn't left me rolling my eyes.
• So Sylar's Mrs. Petrelli's kid too, huh. Trying to decide if I care. Um, nope, I don't.

Premiere Rating: 3.5/10 (and all of those points were delivered by KB, Weevil, and the 5 seconds of David Anders)

Gossip Girl: The Coronation

Gossip Girl: "The Ex-Files"

• Blair: "Where did you summer?"
  Girl: "The Adirondacks."
• Blair: "Break ups are easy. It's having to see them dating someone else that's hard. Why do you think I rub it in Chuck's face every chance I get?"
  Serena: "Because it's your twisted version of foreplay."
• Wow, Vanessa is making a killing off her run-ins with the rich. $10,000 from Chuck, a year's rent from Blair, $5,000 from Catherine...
• Dan waved at Serena again. Shades of their first date.
• Why is Chuck skulking around? Just to be mean, I guess ;-)
• Chuck: "Who'd have thought that Humphrey would be the first one to move on. They're sweet together. Did I overhear something about a lunch?"
• Wow, Lily has no willpower. She's back from her honeymoon for less than a day, and she's already going on dates with Rufus. Bart's gonna love this.
• Blair: "Lunch. As in the meal before dating."
• OMFG! Marcus is banging his step mom! I called it weeks ago! Guess that explains why he's in no rush to sleep with Blair. Catherine, however, can't seem to get enough of the boys.
• Props to Vanessa for having the presence of mind to snap the money shot of Marcus and Catherine.
• Chuck really has developed quite the interest in the Dan/Serena break up saga.
• Dan (about the pic of Marcus and Catherine): "Why can't I look away?"
• Geez, Dan, just cut Serena a break for once. Who the hell cares that she let Blair invite Amanda to lunch before she told Blair to cut it out. (Actually, I think Serena was telling Blair all along not to do it, but Blair wasn't listening. B can be a little headstrong.)
• Serena: "Just so you know, if this were a competition, I wouldn't need Blair and the posse to win."
• Wow, ice queen Blair took the Marcus/Catherine reveal hard! Because she really liked him, or because she didn't want Chuck to have the satisfaction of knowing what happened?
• Is Amanda really worth all this trouble? I think she's kind of annoying.
• Jenny: "I'm talking about you and Miss Hannah Montana on Gossip Girl."
• Wow, Jenny has to be Dan's conscience. It's not a good sign when social climber Little J is the moral compass of the family.
• LOL at Chuck poking Serena with the flower to wake her up. Hilarious.
• There's no other solution than Serena/Dan/Amanda all going out together? Really? I'd imagine that there are any number of other solutions.
• Blair: "I thought my family was twisted, but you people take the cake."
• Leave it to Blair to handle things. Noooo, Vanessa, let Blair deal with it.
• Serena: "Yeah, he likes poets, and letters to poets."
• Dan: "Well you certainly picked a winner."
  Serena: "Yeah, he's fun, non-neurotic. I thought it'd be a nice change."
• Dan missed the point (again). This time, the point was that he hurt Serena's feelings by rebounding so freaking fast and that he should apologize. He is such an asshat.
• Dan: "You should wear a bell."
  Chuck: "Kinky. I'll think about it."
• Blair (to Nate): "Hold that non-thought."
• What is Chuck doing? Why is he going to so much effort to bring back the old Serena? He needs hobbies that don't involve arbitrarily messing with people!
• Oh my God! I missed some of what Chuck was saying about the purple-ish goo. What is that stuff? And why does it burn people's hair off? And why does Chuck just carry it around?
• Serena: "Never again. From now on, everything goes through me." (Hey, I'm finally starting to like Serena.)
• OMFG--Chuck put Amanda up to it all along! Finally, his endgame is revealed, and--no surprise here--it's all about Blair. He's trying to instigate a second coming of the Blair/Serena feud. So he thinks that if Blair is knocked off her pedestal, she'll come and slum it with him. (There is precedent; after he had her humiliated last year in the two-guys-in-one-week incident, she did come to hang out with him.)
• Chuck: "I had to create a monster if I was going to dethrone a queen."
• My sister made the astute observation that all the follower girls switched from wearing headbands (Blair) to boho head scarfs (Serena) overnight. Does this mean I have to change Headband Monday to Headscarf Monday? Because I'm not cool with that.
• Serena putting her head scarf around Blair's neck was bizarre. Perhaps it was a hint that she's supposed to be wearing a scarf now too?
• Chuck: "Hey, look who's back on top. I wonder how that happened? Wait, now that I think about it, I know exactly how that happened."
• Wow, Serena is no joke. She rules with an iron fist. Awesome.
• I can't say I'm heartbroken to see Dan Humphrey get shunned.
• Gossip Girl: "Bow down or bow out."
• Holy moly, the politics and power plays of Gossip Girl put Machiavelli to shame! They really played up the theme tonight, and the whole show can be viewed as a modern day tale of intrigue in a royal court (a la The Tudors and the myriad of other royal court dramas). Amazing. Tour de force episode.

It's Headband Monday... (off-white with a bow from Forever 21):

(Gossip Girl photo: cwtv.com)

Greek: Star-Crossed Lovers

Greek:
"Gays, Ghosts and Gamma Rays"

Some highlights and observations:

• Casey's dream was both romantic and educational!
• Casey's fishing for Ashleigh to suggest that she get Max to help her was pathetic.
• Max's hair looks even worse than normal at times in this episode. But in other scenes, it looked okay. He needs to be more diligent about his hair maintenance routine.
• Casey: "Well, I'm big on second chances. Actually, I'm big on third and forth chances too."
• Of all the would-be TV couples in the world, right now I'm pulling for Casey and Max more than anyone else except for Blair and Chuck. Which is kind of funny, because while Casey does have her Blair-esque moments, Max is basically the anti-Chuck Bass.
• Rusty and Ben trying to crack the password was funny, esp. Rusty's prognosis that it would take him "between 2 hours and never."
• Wow, Max and Officer Leo in the same episode! (Unfortunately, Leo's character on Greek alternates between pushy and boring.)
• Of course Calvin has never been to a gay bar, he's 18! He shouldn't be in any bars!!!
• Max tutors football players too? Poor Casey.
• As soon as Joshua Whopper was mentioned, I guessed that he was really Cappie, which turned out to not be the case. I don't feel too bad though, because Rusty thought so too. I'm confused though. If Rusty got an official list of all the active members of Kappa Tau, shouldn't both Cappie's real name and Joshua Whopper's name have been on the list? So by process of elimination, shouldn't Rusty have been able to figure out what Cappie's real name is? It seems unlikely that the official list wouldn't have had the name of the fraternity president on it. Sorry if I'm thinking about you too hard, Greek.
• Ashleigh: "Oh, he's cute! Weird. But cute!"
• Rusty: "You're not joshing me?"
• Rusty: "Margaret Thatcher was one whopper of a prime minister, huh?"
• Dale helping Rusty study the info on the active Kappa Taus was funny.
• Dale: "What kind of parents name their kid Fairy?" (Did I hear that correctly? Ha.)
• Dale eaves dropping on Casey's conversation about liking someone on the honors physics floor was great. Rusty's expression when he caught him listening was hilarious.
• Casey: "I like Max."
• Rusty: "I should warn him. You date like Sherman's March, Casey. Scorched earth and broken spirits left in your wake." (Now try to imagine someone saying something like this on 90210, and you falling off your chair in surprise.)
• Dale (throws his headphones): "Max? Really? The guy's a freaking loser!"
• Max: "Dale, maybe you can answer me this: why do they always put the environmental awards on the wooden plaques?"
• Dale: "Nobody likes a show off, Max."
• Casey: "I don't get it. I asked him to tutor me; why didn't he just tell me he had a girlfriend?"
• The Kappa Taus (esp. Heath and Beaver) reading the gender studies literature was the funniest they've been for a while. I think it was the funniest KT moment since Beaver read The Great Gatsby aloud.
• Come on, Casey, stop being dense. We could all see the dead girlfriend reveal coming a mile away, but she kept yammering and making herself look very self-centered.
• Wait, Casey ran over Rusty's cat, and last week she was bellyaching about him crashing her car into a mechanical horse? That's like an extremely black pot calling a steel gray kettle black.
• Ashleigh will make a great campus tour guide! Yea for her finding her part-time employment calling!
• This is a little random, but how awesome is Amber Stevens as Ashleigh? She would be a shoo-in for my favorite character on Greek if I didn't already adore Dale, Rusty, and Calvin so much.
• Fancy astronomy lab they've got there.
• This was a good episode, but I didn't love it as much as I loved last week's Casino Night episode. At least we found out what Max's secret is. My horrific event theory from last week turned out to be on target. (I did a lot better at figuring this out than I did at figuring out what "bing" meant.) I'm not sure why his girlfriend dying makes him not want to talk about working for NASA though. I don't understand where NASA fits into the timeline.
• Casey and Max were so cute together! It will be interesting to see where they go from here. What will they talk about now that Casey doesn't need Max to teach her something (card counting, astronomy)? Seeing how this is Greek, it seems likely that Casey's new relationship will hit some major snags soon enough. I'm also excited to see how Cappie and Evan react to the new couple. And I'm holding out hope that super sweet Max doesn't turn annoying like Casey's other love interests have been known to do.

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Gossip Girl: When the Lights Go Out

Gossip Girl: The Dark Night

Hmm, well, I think the main story here was what Chuck said to Blair in his attempt to seduce her. Holy heck, that exchange was hot. Mercy.

But B and C getting caught making out by Marcus wasn't so great. And I know Blair is ruthless and says whatever she needs to say, but I was shocked when she told Marcus that she thought Chuck was him (although upon a second viewing, it did sound like Chuck used a British accent! Come the hell on, Chuck!). I love Blair, but if she had stuck to that story, I would have lost some serious respect for her. Obviously, she knew it was Chuck; he's shorter and hotter than Marcus, and she's certainly kissed both of them enough to be able to distinguish between the two. And pretending that you were almost tricked into having sex with someone (which seems an awful lot like rape) just isn't a good thing to do.

At least Chuck finally realized that he was "blocked" not because he just wanted to sleep with Blair but because he wants to be with Blair (I kind of thought he already knew that, but I guess he forgot). So does Marcus kissing Blair at the end signify that he's taking her back? No surprise here (as I am an ardent Chuck lover), but I've had my fill of Lord Marcus. And his crazy stepmom.

Speaking of the crazy duchess, I thought she told Vanessa that if she couldn't have Nate, she'd kill him. We know that Vanessa doesn't take bribes (see the whole video tape incident of early 2008), so I figured she must have threatened something pretty awful to get V to back off. In actuality, she just threatened to tip off the FBI about Nate's dad's whereabouts. That's certainly a nasty thing to do, but Nate should never have told her where his dad was. Also, I wouldn't have a problem if Mr. Archibald was dragged off to the slammer, so it's not that great of a threat in my opinion.

As for Dan and Serena: guess what, they're still "in love" but breaking up anyway (for the same reasons as always). I don't know why Dan can't just make an effort to better deal with the Fabulous Life of Serena van der Woodsen and the perks it entails. But, unlike those poor Team Dan and Team Serena girls they ran into in the park, I've given up on trying to figure out this situation.

• How clever of the Gossip Girl soundtrack people to play Santogold's "Lights Out" in an episode about a blackout.
• Blair's hosting another party?!
• Marcus: "You're a delicate little flower; nothing like that tart Keira Knightley."
• Should Catherine be parading Nate around in fancy stores in the city? Couldn't people see them? I thought they were going to be sneaky.
• Dan's imaginary new friend "Clyde."
• Sorry, even with a cougar duchess thrown into the mix, I still have a hard time paying attention to Nate and Vanessa.
• Even Dorota reads Gossip Girl?
• Oh no, Blair's tipping the duchess off about Vanessa. Ha.
• Random flight attendants fly in from Tokyo just to have sex with Chuck? I'm trying to decide if I'm surprised about that or not...
• The little Team Dan and Team Serena girls were funny. ("How can you get back with Serena again? Don't you know she's just going to lie to you again?")


• Blair: "And for the record, whatever you're planning with Nate, my bedroom floor's off limits."


• Serena: "Who was that?"
  Chuck: "The whiff of the Far East."


• Serena: "You are not using Blair as sexual Drano!"


• Chuck: "Congrats on you and Humphrey. Water always finds its own level."


• Yea Margaret Colin!!! I just love her. (And according to Ausiello, she's going to get Clueless' Mr. Hall as a love interest? He's sweet and all, but no Eric Close.)


• Smart Nate now realizes that the duchess and Blair are setting him up. He's getting good at sniffing out the schemes of others.


• Dan reading the "should they or shouldn't they" threads on the Gossip Girl site.


• Dan: "It turns out most people think I'm an ass, but a passionate minority hold I'm just an idiot."


• Blair: "Marcus tells the funniest story about Harry running naked across their lawn."


• Blair's dress is lovely.


• Chuck: "Have sex with me."
  Blair: "What?"
  Chuck: "Just once, that's all I need."
  Blair: "You are disgusting, and I hate you."
  Chuck: "Then why are you still holding my hand?"


• Catherine: "I don't like sharing my toys, especially if I've paid for them."


• The duchess holds Nate's hand in a room full of people? Someone needs to teach her the definition of sneaky.


• Nate actually thinks "She's giving me money!" is an appropriate excuse in this situation?


• Catherine: "Blair, have you seen Nate?"
  Blair: "Um, no, it's a blackout."


• Dan: "Do you think there's like a box that says 'open in the event of a Serena van der Woodsen emergency'?"


• Gossip Girl: "I hope you kept the receipt for that tiara, B."


• Rufus' date, Claire, is quite youthful.


• Next week, what I would most love to see is Anne Archibald finally proving that she is actually a mother by charging in and declaring that for no amount of money will she whore out her only son. I won't hold my breath though.

It's Headband Monday! Today I wore this tri-colored silk one:

(Gossip Girl photo: cwtv.com)

Dislike of the New 90210 Unites People

Interestingly enough, today on Entertainment Weekly's PopWatch blog, Jennifer Armstrong's post about the new 90210 says almost the exact same things that I've been saying about the show (here, and especially here). Right down to the fact that the 90210 writers should cheek out Greek to learn how to write wittier dialogue (which is what I was just talking about).

In related news, I would love to work for Entertainment Weekly.

Greek: Casino Night

Greek:
"Let's Make a Deal"

Greek has sneakily become one of my favorite hours of television each week. Unlike other forays into the teen/young adult soap opera, it has likable characters (90210) and witty dialogue (Secret Life of an American Teenager), and it doesn't take itself too seriously. All of which combine for a fun TV experience.

I think this episode of Greek was even more fun than usual, because--seriously--who doesn't love a good Casino Night episode? And, since I'm now borderline-obsessed with counting cards, it was educational too! Seriously, though, props to Greek, because after watching the movie 21, I can attest that not all card counting themed shows/films are enjoyable (that movie was 2 of the longest hours of my life...).

I loved, loved, loved the team of Casey, Rusty, Ashleigh, and Max. (Unfortunately, pairing them all up for one storyline left Cappie and Rebecca alone in their subplot and Frannie and Evan alone in theirs, which isn't ideal.) And even though Max adds yet one more guy to Casey's ever-expanding list of love interests in the second semester (what is it up to now? 20?), I love them together. Personally, I'm now okay with her stepping out of the Cappie/Evan box, and Max is so sweet and smart. And he is not yet nearly as annoying as both Evan and Cappie have become.

But what is the deal with Max? At the end when he was talking to Casey and got spooked when she suggested they go to Dobbler's, it seemed like he might be agoraphobic. That would fit with the fact that he doesn't seem to leave his room very much at all. But, he did leave to go to the Casino Night, and he didn't seem to be upset at all while he was there until the very end (not immediately after Casey hugged him, but soon thereafter). So, I feel like there's something else. And it would also have to explain why he left/got kicked out of NASA. I'm stumped. Maybe the problem is not so much an actual psychological disorder/phobia as some really bad experience he had that has left him emotionally vulnerable. Maybe I'm giving this too much thought.

As for Evan, I don't think he made the wrong choice signing away his freedom to get his trust fund. If he signs and then breaks the rules, the consequence is no more trust fund. If he doesn't sign, the consequence is no more trust fund. So, it seems to me that the logical course of action is to sign the contract and bleed the darn fund dry until the day he decides he actually wants to "go off the map" (whatever that means). No need to forgo the money now because he hypothetically might want to break the rules later. At least that's the way I see it.

Just for the record: there was no Dale in this episode.

Best quotes (and my other thoughts):

• Rusty: "When I was 16, I borrowed her car for my DMV test, and I ended up in a grocery store parking lot, and I ran over one of the coin-operated horse rides."
• I can't believe Ashleigh's just getting her credit card bill now. I also didn't know that such things as "charge cards" still existed.
• Dino appears! And the writers included a cute shout out to the fan confusion regarding Dino:
  ZBZ girl: "I thought Evan was the president of Omega Chi."
  Frannie: "No no. Dino's always been president; Evan's the pledge educator. You need to pay more attention."
• Rusty: "Two hours. That's all I need."
  Casey: "Rusty, two hours was all you needed for your driver's test, remember?"
  Rusty: "I knew you'd bring that up!"
  Casey: "It took four produce men and five quarters to get my car off that horse!"
• Theoretically, Casey could drive Rusty to the store so he could shop for supplies.
• Ashleigh: "42! I got double blackjack!"
• The Chambers family is a real trip.
• Does anyone think that the writers might ever try a romantic Rusty/Ashleigh relationship? I think it might work, and it would be interesting.
• Max (to Rusty while Casey is in the room): "Hey, I got your note. Sorry, I'm car-less. Also, sorry about your sister; she sounds terrible."
• Casey: "Do you own anything that doesn't look like you want to climb a mountain?"
• Casey's 1960s-inspired dress and hair combined for one of her best looks.
• Betsy is hilarious.
• Betsy: "I don't need alcohol to have a good time. I'm high on life."
  Max: "Cherish every moment."
• Calvin makes a good pit boss.
• Ashleigh's evil nerd almost-boyfriend is back! I like it when shows bring back the random characters that they discarded (if it makes sense).
• Ashleigh: "He said polymers are about as interesting as a dirt sandwich.'
  Rusty: "A dirt sandwich that's found in almost every adhesive--"
  Max: "--and lubricant on the planet! Stupid knuckle-dragging astrophysicists!"
• Calvin: "So which ones to we mark?"
  Rusty: "The twos, threes, and fours, so that when he thinks he's getting a high card, he's getting a low one, baby!"
  Calvin: "Don't call me 'baby.'"
• Ok, so I'm thinking there might be a reason we don't see too much of Dino. He's kind of a dork with the constant "It's almost midnight" announcements.
• Rusty writing "sucker" on his arm in the invisible marking ink was awesome.
• For a while I thought Cappie would throw the game so that Team Casey would win.
• Where is Ashleigh going to find a job working 25 hours a week at $20 per hour? Or one working 2 hours a week at $250 per hour? I can actually think of one occupation that makes you that kind of money, but it's not legal... (Also, she's forgetting to factor in taxes.)
• Next week is going to be great if Dale thinks Casey like him!

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Premiere Watch '08: Fringe

Fringe: Pilot


J.J. Abrams*, I'm ready for a new Alias. Lay it on me!

And, wow, Fringe presented the kind of pilot that only J.J. can deliver. Brilliant. A truly skillful combination of drama, action, mythology, humor, and evocative cinematography.

The foundation of the show is very Alias: a female agent in a powerful government agency unwittingly unlocks and gets sucked into a secret world a la Alice falling down the rabbit hole. What sets Fringe apart is the initial introduction of the "fringe science" concept, which opens a whole new and humongous can of worms: flesh melting chemicals, telepathic communications, earthquakes on cue, children who don't age, etc. A cornucopia of strange occurrences that are out of the reach of conventional scientific thought. Also known as a world that J.J. Abrams should have a lot of fun playing around in this season.

Alias and Lost certainly delved into the fringe (prophecies, moving islands, time jumping, etc.), but those shows introduced the stranger elements more gradually. Fringe unabashedly presented its sci fi elements right from the get go, which I appreciate. It's just that four years from now, if I'm going to be debating how islands move when you spin a wheel, how a constant works, if polars bears can travel through portals, how injecting the Passenger with green goo causes her to write secret info, why Irina's name is on the Rambaldi artifact, how Sydney fulfilled Rambaldi's prophecy, etc., etc., etc., then I'd like to know that now.

J.J. has promised that this show won't get bogged down in long-term mythologies, but with evil corporations and secret government groups and mind-bending realities, the traps have been set. We'll have to wait and see how it all goes down. Personally, I look forward to finding out.

Other thoughts:

• The opening scene was very reminiscent of Lost. I wonder if there were as many convicts and con artists on that flight as there were on Oceanic 815.
• Eew, at least no one barfed up goo on Oceanic 815. Eeeeeeeeew, or melted! Yuckkkkk.
• The opening credits montage is cool. The music is kind of A Beautiful Mind-esque.
• As soon as John told Olivia he loved her, I knew he was going to end up dead. This isn't the first J.J. Abrams pilot I've ever seen...
• Wow, the 3-D graphic that floats in the middle of the shot with the name of the location is super cool! An innovative update on Alias' black screen with flashing white letters.
• Whoa, the plane can land itself on autopilot. That's cool.
• Abaddon! He seems angrier on this show than on Lost. Less creepy though.
• The background music is very Lost--I kept expecting to see someone opening a hatch or something.
• After Olivia told John that she loved him, it was cemented that he was going to get killed, and two minutes later, he blows up. Yep. J.J., I know your tricks... Oh no, wait, he's just been exposed to some horrific chemicals and put into a drug-induced coma. Eeeesh. It's beginning to look like Sydney's Danny got off easy...
• Sorry, I'm not sure I'm going to buy Pacey as a guy with an IQ 50 points north of genius...
• Why do people keep calling this poor lady "honey" and "sweetheart"? It's offensive.
• Dr. Bishop: "I thought you'd be fatter."
  Peter/Pacey: "You thought I would be fatter? Excellent first words. Perfect."
• So the U.S. government and John's family don't mind that some institutionalized guy came in and took a slice out of him?
• In the face of this kind of horrific terrorism, why isn't everyone in the government running around like Olivia, panicked and following weird leads? Everyone else seemed awfully calm considering the 200 dead people on the plane.
• So why did Pacey go a bit crazy a couple of years ago?
• Peter/Pacey: "Right, because after 6 hours, that's when they're really dead."
• If I had a dollar for every time a female character on a J.J. Abrams show was put in a big tank of liquid with electrodes stuck on her head...
• Pacey: "Yeah, because bootlegging smack in the basement is just the picture of normalcy."
• How does she ask specific questions when her brain is hooked up to her boyfriend's brain if her consciousness is being ripped open by the drugs? I feel like she should have been given more instructions.
• I hope they don't need to get a conviction in a court of law for this chemical guy. "I saw him in a drug-induced state while my consciousness was connected to my solidified boyfriend's" is not going to hold up in court.
• Security's a little lax in the FBI apparently... Peter/Pacey can just wander into the room where the guy accused with killing 200 people is sitting? And beat him up?
• Ha ha, Peter/Pacey threatening the chemical guy was awesome. "No, you can't do this."
• Yea, a blood transfusion! Those are always fun! (See Sark in Alias' 1x21).
• Oh no!!! Olivia saved her boyfriend only to find out that he was a bad guy working with the chemical guy! I didn't see this one coming... Nicely played, J.J. I was seeing his character as a purely Danny Hecht figure, but he's actually kind of a mix between Danny and the Iceman. Very interesting.
• Nice chase scene.
• John's last words: "Ask yourself why Broyles sent you to the storage facility"? Dude, when you're dying, just spit out the important stuff--don't ask critical thinking questions; there's no time! (Honestly, I was a little confused as to why she was sent to the storage facility too, but I thought that was because I wasn't paying enough attention.)
• Well, I did end up being kind of right about John, because he's dead now...
• After John died, I totally expected as scene where Olivia storms into Broyles' office and demands to join his unit in the vein of red-haired Sydney barging into Sloane's office with the circumference, but it never happened. Instead she went to talk to Peter/Pacey to get him on board. Not that I blame her for going to see him; he is easy on the eyes, and she'd had a rough day.
• The show is certainly going to set up a will they/won't they situation with Olivia and Peter. I think it will be interesting to see how well that works. On Alias, it worked very well with Sydney and Vaughn (until the ill-advised post-Super Bowl episode ruined it) because they were agent and handler and thus unequivocally not allowed to get involved with each other. Olivia and Peter would seem to have fewer obstacles: he's not officially in the FBI, so there are no anti-fraternization rules.
• Oh no, another evil corporation, Massive Dynamic. How Darma Initiative/Hanso Foundation.
• "How long has he been dead?" "Five hours." "Question him." Awesome.

On a scale where Alias' flawless, world-rocking pilot episode scores a 10, I think Fringe falls only a little bit behind. In fact, it probably have scored higher if I'd never seen the Alias pilot and this was my first sojourn into the J.J. world, which seems so fresh and exciting the first time you jump in.

Premiere Rating: 9.0/10

*When I refer to J.J. Abrams, I mean him and the entire team of talented people who work with him.

(photos: fox.com/fringe)

Premiere Watch '08: Privileged

Privileged: "Pilot"

After seeing some very sub-par clips from Privileged on the CW's YouTube account over the summer, to say my expectations were low for this pilot is an understatement. Fortunately, parts of the pilot were re-shot, rewritten, re-edited, or something, because I was pleasantly surprised by the final product that aired after 90210 on Tuesday night.

I think the best news to come out of the Privileged pilot is that Michael Cassidy is still all kinds of adorable. Unfortunately, his character here (Charlie) seems to be more like The O.C.'s Zach than Hidden Palms' Cliff. I'll take Michael Cassidy any way I can get him though.

Also being fairly adorable in this episode was JoAnna Garcia as Megan. I've been a fan of JoAnna's since seeing her in Reba, and I think it's fun to see her playing someone so different than Cheyanne (which is the nice way of saying that Cheyenne was dumb). I'm not really sure, however, why they made JoAnna dye her hair brown for this role (I'm assuming she did that for the show and not just because she felt like it). Can blondes not be smart, CW?

Highlights and other observations:

• Charlie: "Megan, you're sounding newscastery again."
• Any job Megan gets in journalism (at least at this stage of her career) isn't going to allow her to rake in the dough, as they were implying she would be doing if she got the writing job.
• Megan: "Everybody loves Lucille Ball, but nobody ever does anything about it."
• Debi Mazar is awesome.
• At least Megan was able to dye her hair back to brown quickly.
• They really seemed to be pushing Megan as "quirky." She's not that quirky.
• I had numerous problems with that taser scene, which was my least favorite part of the episode. First of all, I don't find someone getting tasered to be all that funny, and secondly, the whole scene didn't make a lot of sense: Megan has to go introduce herself to the girls while they're asleep? That huge house and the two spoiled girls share a room? Sage sleeps with a taser in her hand?
• Hmm, so Megan's from this area. And doesn't want her family to know she's back. That's kind of interesting.
• I thought that Charlie was supposed to be Megan's boyfriend, but I guess not.
• Megan (in response to Sage's suggestion that Jay Gatsby was gay): "Interesting theory. The man does own a lot of shirts." (Between this reference and Greek's Gatsby-themed episode, The Great Gatsby is getting a lot of play lately in the teen soap genre.)
• Why is Megan so surprised that Charlie has moves? How could Michael Cassidy not have moves?
• Megan: "But with great power comes great responsibility--shout out to Uncle Ben."
• Hey, just when you think that everything's about to be wrapped up in a nice bow, Lilly appears. That's a nice dramatic touch.
• Megan: "Is there any other Annie worth mentioning?" (Not the one on 90210, that's for sure.)
• Sage inviting Lilly to the party was definitely a Blair Waldorf move.
• The soundtrack was pretty good with Kate Nash, Ingrid Michaelson, The Bird and the Bee, and Nellie McKay, among others. No "Time to Pretend" though, which is a bummer, because it's not living up to my prediction of it being the "Young Folks" of the 2008 pilot season.

All in all, the show was enjoyable, but I wouldn't say that I was left with an overwhelming desire to see more. Also, the episode seemed like a long hour of TV, which probably isn't a good sign.

More importantly, if anyone knows any rich people who need tutors for their granddaughters, I'm totally up for the job.

Premiere Rating: 6.0/10

(photo: cwtv.com)

90210: Bowling Up a Storm

Well, when I promised that I'd come back this week to watch 90210, I hadn't realized that Fringe and Shawn Johnson's cameo on The Secret Life of the American Teenager were going to be airing in the same time slot. Ahhhhhh! Cue panic attack. I did finally crack this Tuesday night puzzle, and the way it worked out, I ended up watching 90210 live. Go figure.

After this episode, however, I'm not going to promise that I'll be watching next week. I'm losing patience with this show; I'm completely not captivated by any of it. I'm vaguely interested in the Kelly/Mr. Matthews stuff, and that may get more interesting next week if Brenda gets thrown into the mix. Let's hope so, because these high school kids are sleep-inducing.

Comments:

• Naomi does look about 40.
• Real life ages of Mr. Matthews (Ryan Eggold) and Kelly Taylor (Jennie Garth): 23 and 36. That's veering into Nate and Duchess Catherine's territory. Not to mention that to play a parent on a teen soap, I think you only have to be about 13 years older than the kid.
• Oh, man, Naomi's denim jump suit (with shorts) is hideous.
• Ryan's such a cutie volunteering at the juvenile detention center every day.
• Pretty sure that "family night" was uncool in Wichita too.
• Kelly: "Doesn't it freak you out that I have a child?"
  Ryan: "Doesn't it freak you out that I am a child?"
• So Kelly's kid's dad is a guy from high school with lots of history with her, they lost touch, got back together, had the baby, had issues. Sounds like Brandon to me, but Jennie Garth concurred with me in an interview that the father will will be whoever (Brandon or Dylan) agrees to guest star on the show first.
• I'm impressed that Silver can bowl at all considering how skinny she is.
• Wait, we're watching a bowling montage? Has it come to this? Weren't we watching blow jobs in the parking lot just last week? Is there no middle ground?
• So, on Thursdays Naomi goes to night clubs and on Fridays she goes bowling? I find that hard to believe.
• Evan: "So, anyway, I'm going to save most of that emotional goodness for my audition for The Hills."
• First The Virgins, now Vampire Weekend. At least the soundtrack is enjoyable.
• So, to help Naomi deal with seeing her dad cheating on her mom, the other girl runs and gets the guy who cheated on Naomi to talk to her? It doesn't seem like that should work.
• Hmm, Ryan seems to have some money-related demons.
• If Silver didn't want to get caught sleeping in her car, she might have driven it a little further away from Dixon's house.
• I think Naomi looks as old as her mom...
• Wow, tour de force acting here from Dixon in the scene he reveals that he too had a rough home life ("You think I don't know what it's like?"), and I'm only being marginally sarcastic about that.
• Ugh, I'd be okay with telling Dixon's parents about my rough home life, but I wouldn't want to that annoying Annie girl to know...
• Eew, another terrible pair of shorts on Naomi!
• Naomi has a sibling? I'd forgotten about that... where is he/she?
• Wow, Kelly's mom really is a piece of work...
• Marissa's lifeguard station!
• Can they write Annie off this show? No? It's worth a try.
• In next week's promo, Mr. Matthews is looking a little homeless.

Gossip Girl: A Royal Scandal

Gossip Girl:
"Never Been Marcused"

I've been getting crazy excited all week for tonight's new episode of Gossip Girl. I've read in multiple sources that episodes 2 and 3 of the second season are amazing. And, wow, episode 2 did not disappoint.

Before we get to the episode, I want to announce that I've decided to institute Headband Mondays in honor of GG and Blair Waldorf. I rocked a lovely dark purple band with a cloth flower on it today. Who's with me?

This episode was hilarious. Even though the promos ruined the Marcus's-stepmom-is-Nate's-girlfriend-reveal, it was still so much fun to watch the full extent of the scandal reveal itself. I actually liked Serena again while she was reacting to Blair's foot-in-mouth moments and trying to keep Blair from realizing the full awkwardness of the Blair/Nate/Catherine/Marcus situation. Her efforts were in vain, however, because Blair walked right in on the truth of the matter (which took the form of Nate and Catherine sprawled on the floor of the library) and uttered, "Oh my effing God," the phrase made infamous by Gossip Girl promotional materials. Leave it to Blair Waldorf to walk in on a horrific situation and immediately figure out a way to use it to her benefit.

There were some downright classic lines in this episode. So many, in fact, that I just want to watch it again and again on a continuous loop ;-)

Standouts and observations:

• Doesn't Serena feel slutty having to cover up her bra with her Grandpa's coat from the '70s?
• S and D broke up for "many reasons"? Really? Can someone name one? I guess I remember some of the reasons that they broke up for the first time in last season's finale, but the reasons they broke up for the second, third, and fourth times were completely lost on me.
• Blair: "He's a lord, and I love him."
  Serena: "OK...but, Blair, 'love'?"
  Blair: "Like very much--and not just because Tom Hanks gave him a Kleenex at Lady Di's funeral."
• Blair: "Squash? I'll squash you."
• Blair called Chuck "Basshole" to his face ;-)
• Hey, Nate's had parental supervision all this time? Who knew?
• Why did Serena bring a big box of chocolate-covered strawberries to eat on the Jitney? Is that typical Jitney behavior? Because, where I come from, we don't eat chocolate-covered strawberries on the bus...
• Eew, I hope Marcus isn't sleeping with the duchess too. (OK, thankfully he's not.)
• One problem: if Marcus is the stepson of Catherine, why did they not seem to notice that both of them (and her husband/his father) were all at the White Party?
• Chuck: "Which is why I have to get to know him. No one is that perfect. Once I get him outta the way, I'll have a clear shot with Blair."
  Nate: "Oh, you know it's love when you start talking like an assassin."
• Ohhhhhhh noooooooooooooo, it's Vanessa...
• They turned their storage space into a cafe? Do they have the necessary permits and licenses for selling food? This is pretty stupid; how much storage space did they have?!
• Yea! We get to see the squash match!!! Chuck Bass working up a sweat and panting! Between that and all the stealthy scheming, there was a big smile on my face throughout that whole scene...
• Hey, you know what the irony of all this Blair-wants-to-be-British stuff is? Ed Westwick really is British. He could be rocking the British accent too.
• Doroda: "But those are your friends!"
  Blair: "Then invite strangers!"
• Serena: "Well, if you can't find common ground with a dictator, I don't know who can."
• Is Chuck selling his club and giving the money to Mrs. Archibald?! Awwwww! What a good friend he is.
• Ugh, Nate's talking to Vanessa. That really is a last resort.
• Wow, I'm super impressed that Nate figured out the Chuck loan situation so quickly! He's not usually this smart.
• Whoa, quite the classy/boring shindig Blair and Doroda threw together.
• Blair: "Dan! Come meet the lord!"
• Oh, Vanessa's homeschooled. That explains so much. Like why she's always around. And never doing anything school-related.
• I don't think I even listen to Rufus when he talks at this point. At least not when he's talking to Vanessa.
• Gossip Girl: "What's this? Chuck's date and Blair's date are mother and son? And Nate and Blair are exes? And Nate and the mother are in a book club? Now there's a novel plot twist."
• Blair: "She made Waldorf rhyme with Spears! I may as well have gone commando and held my party at Nyla's Burger Basket."
• Um, at the rate Dan and Serena are going, Jenny's never going to get picked up at the train station.
• Nate: "But when the best version of the situation is that I'm going to become Blair's father-in-law, I think it's just time to move on."
• I thought Dan spent all summer making out with random girls? Based on the pictures, it seems like he spent an awful lot of time with Jenny.
• How did Nate think he was going to fix this all by himself? He's 17-years-old after all.
• Blair: "Oh my effing God!"
• Jenny: "Someone must think that his life is pretty fascinating..." (That's what I was saying last week!)
• Blair's smart keeping Serena in the dark regarding how she got the duchess to like her.
• Blair: "I think she recognized part of herself in me. Or rather, I recognized someone in her."
• "New York, I Love You" by LCD Soundsystem! Yea!

When Gossip Girl says, "Welcome home, Upper East Siders," I gotta say, I'm glad to be back.

Holy next week's promo, Batman! (Summary: There's a black out during a party, and Chuck says to Blair, "Have sex with me," and she says, "You are disgusting," and he says, "Then why are you still holding my hand?")

(photo: cwtv.com)

Premiere Watch '08: Bones

Bones: "Yanks in the U.K."

So how excited was I when--for the first time in history--an episode of Bones aired that was not directly conflicting with the airings of one, two, or three of my favorite TV shows? Even better, the two-hour premiere of Bones was filmed on location in jolly old London.

There was a lot of like in this premiere episode, although I'll admit to tiring out a bit and losing some of my attention span during the second hour. These two-hour premieres are kind of exhausting. I guess I need to start getting back into prime TV-watching shape, because there will soon come a day when I'll be expected to plow through at least 3 hours of television a night. Petering out after 1.5 hours will not be an option.

Although I am an ardent London-lover, I think my favorite part of the episode was the goings on back at the Smithsonian. How adorable was that Clark guy, who--try as he might to avoid it--kept getting sucked into the personal sagas of the other lab workers? And then, of course, there was John Francis Daley, whom I love and adore. Who would have guessed that pathetic Sam Weir would now have two doctorates at such a young age?

Highlights and Funny Quotes:

• I'm calling BS: British tabloids wouldn't censor out the heiress' boobs in the picture. The British tabs do not have any qualms about printing pictures of boobs.
• Hodgins: "British slime--so much more proper than American slime."
• I thought the Jeffersonian had top-notch security; how did Grayson get in?
• Dr. Wexler: "But I shall check my diary to see if I killed her."
• Cam: "But he is some kind of god...the best kind."
• How come the ex-spouses never seem to want to sign the divorce papers?
• Uh oh, a British bad boy royal named Harry...this is trouble ;-)
• Why are they driving a car in London in the first place? Take a taxi or the tube. And, honestly, I don't remember ever seeing a London's street so uncrowded.
• Booth: "The royals hate bastards."
  Bones: "Only the ones who don't make king."
• Grayson throwing Hodgins into the garbage truck.
• Angela and Sweets' discussion about his anecdote about the Ninja Turtle toy and the neighbor boy. Sweets: "You're the gay neighbor boy."
• Hodgins: "Did Angela's ex get off okay?"
  Cam: "Whoa, sorry?"
• Booth getting headbutted. What is this, Shameless?
• They are spending an awful lot of time at pubs and cafes next to the Thames. How did I miss those when I was in London? (Well, I guess it was January...)
• Booth: "No, it doesn't make sense. People don't kill someone with a bone symbolically, even in England."
• Can't Angela and Hodgins stay together and work on trusting each other? Does this have to be a now or never thing? Slow the break up train down, people. (I hate it when TV shows rush a break up like this.)
• Grayson: "I heard you broke up with the small, angry man."
• Clark offering to take Grayson to the airport and saying, "I just want to work at a regular lab." (I liked Clark; he was funny.)

Premiere Rating: 6.5/10

Premiere Watch '08: Greek*

Greek: Crush Landing

*Tech- nically, last night's episode of Greek was not it's premiere. Unfor- tunately, when Greek did premiere it's fall series last week, I was in the midst of a complete computer breakdown, and no blogging was getting done. Also, it's so hard to figure out what season it is on Greek anyway. Did it just premiere it's 2nd season? Is this just season 1, part 3? I'm sure I could find out if I really wanted to, but instead I'm blogging this episode and calling it a day.

Just a quick note on last week's episode: Dale stole the show (shocker). Calvin is also quite funny, and the Rusty/Dale/Calvin odd trio makes for some entertaining TV.

Also, it bugs me to no end that we're still supposedly in the second half of the second semester of the school year that started in real time last summer. This has been the most eventful school year ever.

Anyway, last night's episode: Not a bad effort. I liked the Casey/Ashleigh/Hotness Monster interactions and also enjoyed Rusty's identity crises. I'm glad he got himself sorted out (it made me smile when was already up and dressed when his alarm went off the next morning).

Oddly, or not oddly, Cappie is back to being Super Immature Cappie, who pops up every once in awhile until Sage and Wise Cappie turns up. That kid is kind of hot and cold. I've seen nothing to suggest that Cappie isn't perfectly emotionally capable of sensitively helping Rebecca through her parents' divorce, but he sure ain't doing it. He's helped plenty of people through plenty of problems over the past couple semesters, but now he's worthless. Is he just having an off night, or does it somehow involve who he's helping? In next week's promo, Rebecca implies that, were she Casey, Cappie would be perfectly capable of being the serious, helpful boyfriend. Let's hope she sticks to that rationale and we get rid of Rebeppie (Cabecca?) for good.

Also, Evan is now totally back to being all kinds of sleazy. Remember those four episodes where he was the sweetest guy in the world? Ahh, those were the days...

I always scream bloody murder when Dale isn't in an episode, and I'd like to expand that condemnation to now include episodes with no Calvin.

I'd also like to raise a question: how many boyfriends/love interests does Casey need in one semester? Holy cow. By my count in the spring semester, she's had: Evan, Cappie, the 16-year-old, Junior from Wildfire, the Mr. Purrfect guy, and now Hotness Monster. I mean, good for her, but doesn't that seem a little excessive?

Highlights and observations:

• Ashleigh: "I have a lot of nice things in here, and I don't want blood on them."
• Rusty: "Can't talk, Cappie. I'm late for class."
  Cappie: "Are your pants already down there?"
• Hmm, an RA who hides in his room...I had one of those too, actually.
• Rebecca: "I have new respect of Chelsea Clinton."
  Cappie: "Me too! Now that she's grown into her face, she's foxy."
• Drew Collins: "I have a favor to ask you. Please save me from having to read about the pregnant man by telling me your life story."
• Dale: I'm about to regurgitate if this RA doesn't show up soon."
• Sorry, this Max character is a way better RA than mine was. (And Max is pretty darn cute...it's too bad the actor is still rocking his Swingtown hairdo.)
• Cappie: "Your skipping classes, you're avoiding schoolwork... It's like you're a real, live boy."
• Casey: "I believe that's a case of the flip flop calling the sandal black."
• Ashleigh: "Maybe we can share him. I'll take the top half--wait, let me think that through."
• Max: "Is it too hard for you?"
  Rusty: "Not really."
  Max: "Well, that's pretty arrogant."
• Ashleigh: "Tell you what, I'll wear flats if you take out your chicken cutlets!"
• Dale: "Oh, well, I used my last bottle of chloroform when I was on Murder, She Wrote."
• Casey: "Ash likes to keep little mementos too, don't you?"
  Ashleigh: "I keep things that mean something to me--objects, not ex-boyfriends."
• Ashleigh: "Yeah, we've seen each other through good times and bad. Like that time you hooked up with that 16-year-old! Oops!" (Ha, go Ashleigh!)
• Dale (after describing Samir's failed attempt with the "dynamite"): "But I ended up getting in with this clothes hanger. I mean, it really couldn't have been easier."
• Wow, all of a sudden Dobbler's doesn't serve alcohol underage people.
• I think Max is Rusty's sole mate.

Premiere* Rating: 6.5/10

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Premiere Watch '08: 90210

90210: "We're Not in Kansas Anymore" and "The Jet Setters"

Da da da da, da da da da (clap clap). Well, 90210 is back, or rather, the new 90210 is here. But is that a good thing? Let's discuss...

The show is all right. It's certainly not the complete disaster that it fairly easily could have been. It's also not a life-changing or ground-breaking foray into the teen soap world like The O.C. was. I also remember the original 90210 as having more of an edge.

One flaw I'm noticing out of the gate for the new 90210 is that is seems a little light. As in, the stakes don't seem that high. After two episodes into The O.C., Ryan had been in and out of the juvenile detention center a couple of times, there were several ass kickings, a house was burnt down, and the main character was abandoned by his family, among other major developments. During two hours of 90210 tonight, we had a couple break ups, a couple shoving matches, some groundings...nothing too heavy. Even on Gossip Girl, everything certainly feels important, even if it's ultimately not that big of a deal. People on Veronica Mars were freaking murdered. The point is, how long are we going to care about the relationships of high schoolers if nothing much else is going on?

One way to make us care about characters (no matter what their doing) is to make them ridiculously charismatic. The Seth Cohens, Chuck Basses, and Dick Casablancases of the fictitious world don't need to be involved in great story lines for us to love them. We just love them already. On the new 90210, there were a few characters with the potential to be lovable (Mr. Matthews, maybe Ethan, Silver), but I don't think any of them quite got there yet.

I'm nervous that many of the main characters (Annie, Dixon, Naomi) didn't give me much to like about them at all. Annie was over-the-top. Dixon was bland. Naomi looks like she's 35 years old.

The new 90210's ace in the hole: Jessica Walter. She's freaking hilarious, and any show could use a Lucille Bluth (and, let's face it, that's who she was playing).

I think the most interesting aspect of the pilot episodes was trying to piece together the back story of the original 90210 characters. I'm no doctorate-level 90210 historian, but I can remember some of it. Tonight's interesting developments: Silver is the child of David's dad and Kelly's mom (they got married during the original series) and Kelly has a 4.5-year-old son. The conversation between Brenda and Kelly seemed to suggest that the child's father is Brandon, which is a shocker since Kelly ended the original series with Dylan. So, I guess we're to believe that after the show ended, Kelly continued to flip flop back and forth between Dylan and Brandon, neither of whom ultimately stuck. My theory is that the new 90210's producers think they have a better chance of getting Jason Priestley to do a guest appearance than Luke Perry.

I think we could have done without both episodes tonight. I think the first one would have stood on its own quite nicely. However, I'll be watching next week to see how episode 3 goes.

Other observations on episode 1:

• I'm having some problems understanding Dixon a la Chris Brown's The O.C. season 4 cameo. I did get "Sucks. Bites. Blows." though.
• Jessica Walter is so awesome. I think she's considerably nicer on 90210 than she was on Arrested Development.
• Is MGMT's "Time to Pretend" the "Young Folks" of 2008 (in terms of ubiquitous plays in pilot episodes)? I hope so!
• Navid is cool. He's fast-talking like a journalistic Cappie.
• Hannah Zuckerman-Vasquez does the morning news... Mr. Matthews: "What is that girl, like 30?" (ha!)
• Mr. Matthews is adorable. (The actor was on one episode of Veronica Mars as Logan's real secret half brother.)
• The Kelly Taylor I remember would never have been a guidance counselor.
• Silver is amusing.
• Speaking as a former Writing Center instructor, I can diagnose Naomi as having a serious case of writing anxiety ;-)
• So which student is the hot teacher going to have a illicit affair with? My guess is Naomi (and I wouldn't have been too surprised if it was already going on).
• Grandma: "I say it was racially motivated!"
• It's nice that Annie and Dixon really seem to crack each up...because they might not end up with any other friends.
• It's gotta be beyond awkward to run into your (current) English teacher at a bar.
• Aunt Becky used to date a guy who lived in a tepee? Now he sounds like an interesting character.
• Grandma: "I won't tell the rest of the story, because I don't remember it."
• Silver: "Yeah, well, that's what blogs are supposed to do: cause problems."
• Since when do you have to read your term paper in front of the class? What would that take, like 15 minutes?
• Whoa, Dixon is already going to a dark place with his tipping Naomi off that Ethan is cheating via text message.
• Sorry, Annie's singing performance was just scary.
• Told you Dixon's revenge text was hasty.
• Dude, Naomi's crazy mom and Annie's dad have a son together! And she's all indignant about it. Even though he never knew about it. Not sure why she's still so mad.
• Was that Marissa's lifeguard station on the beach?

Episode 2:

• Grandma: "I need to finish my memoirs before my friend does. We've slept with all the same people!"
• Wow, Harry actually told Aunt Becky that he has a secret kid! Normally, it takes months for that kind of news to drop.
• Mr. Matthews: "Well, you're too easy. Anyone ever tell you that?"
  Kelly: "Not lately."
• These kids do actually remind me more of kids than the Gossip Girl "kids" do. They also seem more kid-like to me than The O.C. kids ever did, but that could be because I'm (shudder) getting older. Eek!
• It's Brenda! And Kelly and Nat are happy to see her! Really?
• So porn producers don't mind if their sons take their pigs and let them loose never to be seen again?
• So, Annie isn't allowed to have any more dates on school nights, but she's allowed to go hang out by the pool with Ethan right now? Come on, parents!
• My new guess for the student/Mr. Matthews hookup is Adriana.
• Anyone else getting a Mean Girls vibe from this Silver/Naomi "we used to be friends" stuff?
• Why did Annie take a match box from the San Francisco restaurant? What is this, 1947?
• A Kelly/Mr. Matthews/Brenda love triangle perhaps? We haven't seen anything like that before...
• Frankly, I think that Dixon not being allowed to text message is a good idea.
• Poor Ethan and his "pentapus."

Premiere Rating: 6/10

(photo: cwtv.com)