SYTYCD: Almost There

So You Think You Can Dance: "Top 8 Performance Show"

So, what's the deal with there being a 6-person finale next week? I don't like the sound of that at all. They should have shown us one fewer week of auditions (which seemed endless this fall) so they could have had an extra week of the actual contest. Or we could have not had that "everyone dances in their specialties and no one gets kicked off" week. It was kind of nice at the time, but not worth screwing up the finale over.

There was no Ashleigh during the intros. Uh oh, her arm's in a sling. She dislocated her shoulder earlier in the day. That sucks. Ok, but we can vote for Ashleigh even though she's not dancing?! I know it's not her fault that she's hurt, but how is that fair to the people who are dancing tonight and opening themselves up to mistakes and criticism?

Kathryn and Ryan (Doriana Sanchez disco):

• The featurette: Aw, crap! I was hoping Kathryn would get super popular partner this week like Russell or Jakob. And not have to do something lame like disco. And maybe not have to go first.(BTW, has Kathryn ever gotten to do a contemporary partner routine? She and Legacy did a jazz routine once, but that's all I can remember.)
• The dance: Wow, Ryan's pants are hideous. They're black and have silver sparkly swirls on them. Wow, Kathryn's black dress just got ripped away to reveal a really skimpy sparkly number. Looked like there was a flubbed lift there towards the end. Well, it was fun enough, but I don't see lots of people voting for it.
• The judging: Adam loved it and thinks Kathryn could not look more beautiful. Mary's trying to pimp Kathryn for votes too. Nigel thought the style suited Kathryn and that her outfit is hot. Nigel thinks Ryan was too stiff and they show a recap clip of Ryan looking absolutely ridiculous. Mary disagrees and says that the in disco style you're supposed to be stiff.

Mollee and Jakob (Jason Viennese waltz):

• The featurette: Son of a bitch! Jakob's going to pull Mollee through to the darn finale. According to Mollee, the winners of all of the other SYTYCD seasons have gone onto spectacular things. Has anyone heard from Sabra since she won? I know the other winners have been around, but I'm not sure I'd necessarily deem their follow-up work to be "spectacular."
• The dance: Seriously bland costuming. So, I'm convinced: Jakob can make anyone look good. Not really getting the "Mollee's lost her mojo and Jakob's helping her get it back" story line here. Especially since Mollee was grinning in the beginning.
• The judging: Adam could have watched it for two more hours. Season 5's Kayla is sitting behind the choreographer. Mary says Jakob's partnering work was fantastic. If I had a dollar for every time I've heard Mary say, "You were there for her every step of the way," I'd be a very rich girl. If Lil C gets ridiculed for overusing his thesaurus, Mary could sure stand to borrow it. Nigel thought they had a constant flow of movement that was beautiful.

Ashleigh comes out to chat instead of performing a solo. She could have done a solo just with her legs/feet or something. Poor Ash is sad that she can't dance tonight.

Ellenore and Legacy (Travis Wall contemporary):

• The featurette: The dancers are married assassins who were hired to kill each other (so it's Mr. and Mrs. Smith). This dance is dangerous.
• The dance: Nice jump/catch lift there. Ellenore's outfit is pretty awesome--and holy moly so that leg extension she just pulled off was amazing too! Whoa, Legacy just cleared the table with a flip! So did either of them end up "dead" at the end of the dance? I don't think so. Legacy was trying to strangle Ellenore, but she was sitting on him and looked ok. This is not my favorite Travis choreo ever, but I definitely enjoyed it. It was interesting.
• The judging: Adam (paraphrase): "I appreciate any choreographer who understands the close relationship between dancing and murder." He thought they murdered the routine. Mary: "Oh, come on, Adam, it wasn't that good. ...Of course it was!!!" Um, worst fake out ever. They agree that Travis used the couple he had very well. Nigel thinks this routine might get Travis an Emmy nomination (like the last table routine got an Emmy nom for Mandy Moore). Uh, personally I think Travis has showed better routines this year, Emmy voters, but whatever. Maybe Emmy voters just love tables? I've heard stranger things.

Jakob's solo: Wearing a hoodie and short bike shorts. Definitely an interesting look, and it kind of distracted me from the dancing. I'm sure his dancing was superb as always, though. Cat (to Jakob): "We have to stop meeting this way."

(Ashleigh) and Russell (Shane Sparks hip hop):

• The featurette: Shane: "This is not a lyrical routine. This is a street hip hop routine." Hells yeah! Um, who does Russell have to dance this with? Shane's assistant Rachel. Russell's making quite a career on this show out of dancing with non-contestants.
• The dance: Russell has no problems whatsoever with street hip hop. His moves are great and his expressions are classic. Russell should give classes on hip hop facial expressions; he comes up with literally the best faces ever.
• The judging: Adam was disappointed that he didn't get to see Ash do more hip hop. He says that Russell's performance level was very high. Nigel starts talking about Shane's Season 2 routine for Benji and Donyelle and said that Donyelle "had a lot of booty to shake." Wow! That was uncalled for, creepy old man! Shane and the other audience members looked uncomfortable. Nigel (to Russell): "I have a feeling we're going to see you in the finale, sunshine."

Mollee's solo: For a second there, I thought this solo was going to be really awesome, but then she seemed to trade in dancing for a lot of wiggling that approached looking stripperish. Super classy.

Kathryn and Ryan (Jason cha-cha):

• The featurette: Wow, a disco and a cha-cha. Those are big vote-getters.
• The dance: Kathryn's dressed for Moulin Rouge. Kathryn looks pretty much like a natural at this style to me. Nice routine; not my favorite SYTYCD Latin ballroom number ever, but it was quite good. And that end pose/lift was awesome! The crowd loved it.
• The judging: Adam says that was one of the best ballroom routines on the show. Adam says Kathryn is surging. Keep selling her, Adam! Vote, people, vote! (I might have to break down and break out my voting phone tonight.) Mary says the whole floor was on fire and the routine was on fire from beginning to end. Mary said Kathryn made it look effortless and she looked like a genuine ballroomer. Mary says there's only one thing left she can do, and gives them two first-class tickets on the Hot Tamale Train. Mary's going to be in Jason's "Burn the Floor" show in January. Nigel: "Kathryn went everywhere she should have gone."

Legacy's solo: Dancing to Chromeo's "Fancy Footwork"--hell yeah! That's so much better than last week's Jordin Sparks or whatever that was. He has a prop phone. Cat: "Who is it?" Legacy: "It's America."

Ellenore's solo: Dancing to James Brown's "I Got the Feeling." The song's great, but I'm not sure her routine totally went with it. Travis tweeted that Ellenore has some sort injury and I'm thinking that may have played a role here.

Russell's solo: RUSSELL IS DRESSED LIKE SANTA AND KRUMPING!!!! Just give him the damn SYTYCD title now. He krumped right on out of his shoe and then put it back on, mid-dance! Then he pulled an adorable teddy bear out of his Santa sack and sat on the chair with the bear on his lap to end the solo! Too freaking cute to stand!!!

Jakob and Mollee (Joey Dowling Broadway):

• The featurette: In this number, Jakob is the mastermind and Mollee is "ditzy and doesn't really know what's going on." Well, no kidding.
• The dance: Jakob needs to lose the trench coat--it's ruining his lines. Ok, there we go. Mollee's little green outfit is cool. I pity anyone who has to do side-by-side leaps and leg extensions with Jakob. I'll continue my tradition of saying that any non-Tyce Broadway routine was better than the usual SYTYCD Broadway routines though.
• The judging: Adam thinks Joey did a fantastic job, and that the dancers gave a good performance. Adam says the best thing that happened to Mollee was that she got Jakob--uh, duh. Adam thinks Jakob is one of the best dancers they've ever had on the show. Uh, Mary, Ellenore could have matched those leg kicks. Nigel says Joey Dowling is a beautiful woman. Uh, relevance? Can Nigel get through a minute without making comments on people's appearances?

Kathryn's solo: No props or gimmicks, just lovely dancing. And she didn't rely on fancy tricks or pop-tart shimmies. 1-888-836-7607

Ellenore and Legacy (Napoleon and Tabitha hip hop):

• The featurette: Um, didn't Legacy do hip hop last week? And, come to think of it, he did contemporary last week too! So he did the same two styles of dance two freaking weeks in a row! He can do other things, folks, we don't have to coddle him. In this routine, they're portraying aliens. Because Nigel loved that so much when Jason and Caitlin did it last season.
• The dance: These outfits don't look alien-ish to me. Um, in my opinion, this routine was weak. Kinda looked like I could do most of this choreo (aside from Legacy's tricks). Shane's street hip hop routine kicked this hip hop routine's ass. Legacy's post-dance antics might have saved them though; he was cute.
• The judging: They take a long break to talk in alien language. Adam says it wasn't his favorite routine of the night because it didn't push them. He says the dancing was "good. It ain't bad, but it ain't great." Ellenore says something in her alien language and Mary says, "I had a feeling she was going to say that." Mary was left a little disappointed, and she doesn't think the costumes were helping. Nigel insulted NappyTabs, but tried to make it sound like he wasn't insulting NappyTabs. And he and Mary think that their dancing was not always together. (So, did NappyTabs really just screw the pooch on this one--which, frankly, I would believe because I'm rarely impressed with their work--or did this get watered down to accomodate Ellenore's secret injury?)

Ryan's solo: I'll say this solo was better than last week's solo because at least he's wearing ballroom-appropriate clothing and using ballroom-appropriate music, but it sure wasn't anything special. And then when he was supposed to give his phone number, he said for vote for #1, who is Ashleigh, and fought back tears. Thanks for that sweet, selfless display, Ryan. Now Ash and Mollee will make the finale and one of the more-deserving Kathryn and Ellenore will get the boot. Aces.

(Ashleigh) and Russell (Nakul Bollywood):

• The dance: Russell with assistant Alicia. Wow, Russell's got glittery purple parachute pants. Well, Alicia's darn good, as you'd expect. Russell's making it work too. He kind of abandoned his awesome facial expressions part of the way through though and just went with an omnipresent maniacal grin.
• The judging: Adam says that Russell "blew joy out of every pore." Mary gives Russell props for having to dance with three different partners in the last couple of days. She says he nailed the steps and made it look like so much fun. Nigel says even though Russell was dancing with a Bollywood specialist, his eye went to Russell because he's magnetic.

For the recaps, they showed practice footage of Ashleigh doing the two routines. Too bad they couldn't have figured out some way to show us more of that. I'd feel better about people being able to vote her through to next week if we at least had a general idea of how she would have done in these routines.

Let's not lose Kathryn in the shuffle, folks! Please!

Overall, most of the routines were good tonight, but there wasn't much that was OMGWOW!

My favorite routines: Russell's hip hop, Kathryn and Ryan's cha-cha, and Ellenore and Legacy's contemporary

My Top 6 is Russell, Jakob, Kathryn, Ellenore, Legacy, and... well, I have a bit of a problem with voting someone through who didn't compete, but I'd gladly send Ashleigh through instead of Mollee if that's what it comes down to.

Nigel says that now it doesn't matter about technique and that we should vote for who we love. Well, then, that would be Russell.

SYTYCD: Now We're Talking!

So You Think You Can Dance: "Top 14 Performance Show"

The play-by-play:

• Is it just me or did Victor do literally nothing in his intro dance?
• Almost all of the girls are wearing hot pants. Except for Karen, who has on sort of a wrap dress. I guess she's trying to be a little more frumpy since we're not voting for her because we're intimidated by her sexuality, according to Nigel. Couldn't be because we just don't like her, huh?
• Cat is wearing a sparkly silver-ish Grecian strapless dress.
• No, we don't want to see a 9-year-old Nigel! Stop wasting my time! Just bring out the dancers!
• Adam makes a botox joke about Mary.
• Mary does look gorgeous tonight.
• Ha! Adam's child pic is pretty funny.
• I know Travis choreographed a routine for this episode, and I'm guesses it's for either Mollee and Nathan (redemption for last week) or Russell and Noelle (further proof of the awesomeness of Russell).

Ashleigh and Jakob (Tabitha and Napoleon hip hop): I was guessing that these two were headed for a hip hop. They will, at least, probably be better served with a NappyTabs hip hop routine than they would have been by a more hardcore Dave Scott, Shane Sparks, or Lil C number.

• The featurette: It is cool that we get to see videos of the dancer's favorite childhood performances. Jakob used to be a little "chunky." Awww! Jakob's doing the "Bye, Bye, Bye" dance in his archive footage! Haha!
• The dance: Wow, Jakob is good at this--not sure why I'm even remotely surprised by that. Ash is doing pretty well too--eons better than her husband did at hip hop last week. Half this dance looks like the same moves that were in "Bleeding Love" but without the briefcase. Nevertheless, I'd say it was one of the better NappyTabs routines in a while.
• The judging: Nigel knows so many people who have suffered due to the wrong people seeing their texts. Nigel has no doubt that Jakob's going to make it into the Top 10. Nigel thinks Ashleigh's style was really good tonight as well. Mary: "What a shocker...another bad relationship on So You Think You Can Dance." Adam thinks that Jakob is about as sure of a bet for the Top 10 as ever there was on SYTYCD.

Karen and Kevin (Spencer Liff Broadway): Eesh! These two were in the Bottom 3 couples last week, and this week they have to do Broadway? That's a bit harsh.

• The featurette: Ha at the video of little Kevin dancing. One of Kevin's most memorable dance performances was a Michael Jackson tribute number, during which he broke down and really thought he was Michael Jackson. Karen and Kevin had a much harder time with the routine than Spencer expected.
• The dance: Well, it's not the most dynamic or engaging routine, but I rather like both of them in this. Some of Kevin's facial expression choices are confusing me though. I definitely like Karen a lot better in this than I do when she's relying so heavily on being sexy.
• The judging: Nigel didn't like Karen's performance as much as usual because she didn't get to bring the sexiness to it (Nigel and I are on opposite pages). He thought Kevin's performance was worse. Mary thinks Kevin looked awkward in the in-between transitions. Adam points out that it's amazing that Kevin can even get through it, being a hip hopper. Adam enjoyed watching Karen dance without pulling out the tigress. So Adam agrees with me, and is thus back in my good graces.

Noelle and Russell (Eddie Simon fox trot): Are you kidding me? Russell has to do another fox trot?! That's what he did with Melanie in the first week! Boooooo! What's the boy have to do to get a Travis Wall contemporary routine? (So this means Mollee and Nathan get Travis' routine tonight, if my calculations are correct.) If they're going to make him do more ballroom, at least change up the style: samba, cha cha, jive, mambo, rumba, tango, paso doble, whatever.

• The featurette: Vintage video of Russell singing!! Awww! Aww, and there he is doing Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean"! So cute!
• The dance: Russell looks a little stiff maybe, but that might be what you're supposed to do in a fox trot for all I know. They did some really flashy turns there in the middle; very nice. The routine looked like it kind of ran out of steam in the middle-end part, but, overall, it was rather entertaining.
• The judging: Nigel says Russell's vastly improved at the fox trot over the past few weeks. Nigel says his "rise and fall" was really there and he commends his fouette pirouette, which I also loved. Mary says that Russell didn't look worried, and there's a lot to be worried about in a fox trot because it is so slow. Mary says Noelle's footwork and knees and feet were absolutely correct. Adam says the fox trot is the second most deadly dance aside from the quick step.

Channing and Victor (Tyce Diorio jazz): I thought we'd been getting away without much Tyce lately...

• The featurette: Victor: "I was a brat. I was the kid who would get lost in a department store." Victor's turns in the old routine don't look that bad to me. The routine is about two curious blackbirds coming out to play. Arg--Tyce is acting even Tyce-ier than usual.
• The dance: Wow, there's a big bird cage made of rope on the set. That thing is cool. Channing's looking good tonight. Parts of this routine are really cool; other parts aren't as exciting. Overall, I rather liked it, and thought they danced it quite nicely.
• The judging: In practice Channing pecked Victor in the head and he had to get 5 stitches above his eye! Nigel says this is the first routine where Channing looked like she was enjoying herself, and that made it a lot more interesting to watch. Nigel says Victor's always been at a high level, but he's kind of stagnant so he needs to push it a bit. Adam says the weirdness of this rendition of the song kept him out of the number a bit, but that it was well danced and well choreographed.

Kathryn and Legacy (Tony and Meredith paso doble):

• The featurette: Kathryn's mom owned a dance studio. Legacy was a rebellious child. Legacy's dad bribed him with $5 to do a '70s dance at a house party. In this dance, Legacy is an admiral in the navy who comes into port to see his Kathryn, his concubine, who is angry with him.
• The dance: Um, why isn't the navy admiral wearing a shirt? What kind of navy is this? Kathryn looks very good. Her flowy skirt is helping. I thought Legacy is handling this routine well too. Ooh, very nice! I quite liked that routine/performance! It was dramatic, but not quite as over-the-top dramatic as the paso Jeanine and Brandon did in last season's finale.
• The judging: What? Now we have to wait until after another commercial break to hear what the judges think? Nonsense! Nigel: "How many admirals do you know who are walking around like that?!" Adam: "If he's an admiral, I know a lot of people who want to join that navy!" Nigel says Kathryn certainly wasn't being juvenile in her dancing this week and says that she was "absolutely magnificent." Mary says Kathryn played that just right. Mary says some of the technical aspects weren't there for Legacy, but he nailed the character of the paso perfectly. Adam says Kathryn "killed it" and "just destroyed out there." Adam says that Legacy's stamina has grown a lot since Vegas. Adam: "You are no longer a break dancer; you're a dancer."

They interrupt the show to give us an update about the Dizzy Feet Foundation.

• Can you imagine how pumped SYTYCD is going to be when one of these Dizzy Feet kids makes the show?!
• Debbie Allen! I miss Debbie Allen. And Mia! I kinda miss Mia too!
• We meet the nine kids with Dizzy Feet scholarships and then see some other cute kids as well.
• Dude, I can't go to this Dizzy Feet gala! I don't live in L.A.! If it's really the "can't miss dance event of the year," televise it, darn you!

Ellenore and Ryan (Travis Wall contemporary): Ack, I was foiled! These two "pulled" the Travis routine. I guess the producers don't want Ryan in the Bottom 3 anymore because they'll have an increasingly hard time justifying keeping him around? (Ballroom solos typically don't play that well on elimination night.)

• The featurette: Ryan's grandparents were professional ballroom dancers. In his first dance performance, he was a bunny, ha! Look--Travis' helper is Season 3's Jaimie (of the Hummingbird Routine)!! Travis is flipping out during the practice.
• The dance: Aww, it's to "Your Ex-Lover is Dead" by the Stars (which was featured on The O.C. back in the day). I'm hooked already; this song is great! Loved the routine (as followers of my Travis love would expect). I adored the "surprise meeting" aspect to it. Ellenore looked great. Ryan was good, but he looked a little ballroom-stiff (his extension was a bit lacking at times).
• The judging: Nigel says they benefited from a brilliant Travis Wall routine. Nigel says this routine was his favorite of the night. Nigel says Ryan was the best ballroom dancer who has ever done contemporary (on the show). Uh, I'm going to have to consider that claim. Mary says Travis just hasn't taken a wrong step in this season (which is good since I think he's only choreographed two routines so far). Mary and Nigel say that Ellenore can transform into any character she's given. Mary says Ryan has broken so many barriers for ballroom dancers in this competition. Adam says SYTYCD has "just kicked in right now." Adam says Ellenore was ridiculous.

Mollee and Nathan (Laurie Ann Gibson pop jazz): Is it just me, or do Nathan and Mollee always get to close the show or go near the end, while Karen and Kevin and Ashleigh and Jakob always have to go first or at least early?

• The featurette: I think we've already met the "kiddie versions" of Nathan and Mollee. Mollee was wearing a lot of makeup for a child--she looks awful child pageanty in the footage. Oh, Laurie Ann is going to eat these two for lunch!
• The dance: Lady Gaga. The routine/dancing is good, but I'm not totally blown away. That probably has more to do with how good so many of the other routines have been tonight and less to do with this one. I'm a little burnt out. The first 10 seconds of this routine when they jazz sprinted across the stage were easily the best part.
• The judging: Nigel commends their commitment to this dance. Uh, did Nigel just say that "only in dancing" are you "underpaid, underappreciated, and overworked"? Seriously, Nigel? I know there are a lot of people in a lot of other professions who would beg to differ. Nigel says Nathan needs to start to grow some more because other (less technically proficient) dancers are rising to his level. Mary said Mollee was "just perfection" and so was Nathan, but the performance didn't give her chills. In the future, Adam wants them to find more nuance to their chemistry, and that point makes a lot of sense to me. We like these guys, but we haven't really been given much reason to like them other than the fact that they're cute.

Overall, tonight's performances were muuuuuuuuuuuuch better than the ones we saw last week. There literally wasn't a routine tonight that I didn't at least like, and it's hard to pick just three favorites. I'll go with:

Kathryn and Legacy's paso doble
Ellenore and Ryan's contemporary
Channing and Victor's jazz

but I can't rank them amongst those three. And I also really liked Jakob and Ash's hip hop and Russell and Noelle's fox trot. Eesh! Who is going to be in the Bottom 3 this week? Looks like Kevin and Karen, but aside from them, I don't know. The judges don't seem to know which other couples are headed for the Bottom 3 either.

In any event, bravo to SYTYCD tonight! In my opinion, this was easily the best performance show of the season so far.

Gossip Girl: Ripping Off Saved By The Bell

Gossip Girl: "The Last Days of Disco Stick"

So, as I was watching Dan's hip hop treatment of Snow White, I was struck initially by how insanely horrible it was. Then I was struck by how oddly familiar it seemed. I realized that Gossip Girl's horrendous re-envisioning of the classic fairy tale with hip hop beats and garish, brightly-colored costumes was extremely similar to a re-envisioning of Snow White done with hip hop beats and garish, brightly-colored costumes on Saved By The Bell. In 1992. What's more is that SBTB's Snow White was better written and better acted. (I'll admit that Elizabeth Berkley is no Kanye, but the "kiss me, mama" joke is at least funny. There was nothing funny about GG's version.)



Ok, so we've known for awhile now that Gossip Girl is not what it once was, but I didn't think it had come to plagiarizing Saved By The Bell. And, if the people in charge of GG had to plagiarize SBTB, why of all things would they decide to steal the Snow White hip hop remix?! They should have taken the plot line about when Jessi's dad brought them all to his hotel for his wedding and Jessi tried to sabotage it because she thought her future stepmom was too young. Or the time they all got locked in the mall with the thieves! Or, during Saved By The Bell: The College Years, when Zach faked an illness as part of a scheme to break up Kelly and her professor boyfriend and the clinic ran a whole lot of medical tests on him, which led to this exchange that still makes me laugh:

Kelly: "You've been through a lot today."
Zach: "And a lot's been through me!"

Ahh, Zach and Kelly...

Anyway, If Dan makes it in to Tisch's playwriting program thanks to his rip off of a Saved By The Bell episode from the early '90s, Tisch should seriously consider suing Gossip Girl for libel or slander or defamation of character or something.

Here's a list of my other thoughts (which, let's face it, is really just a list of other things that annoyed me):

• Oh, God, don't make me watch Dan Humphrey's swagger walk. Gag.
• Blair looks dangerously close to wearing leggings as pants! What is going on?! Leggings are not pants!!!
• Poor Leighton has to stand around and wait for 15 minutes while Ed gets his lines out.
• Dan is a COMPLETE idiot if he doesn't see how this threesome thing is going to blow up in his face.
• "Bitches of Eastwick"? That seems like kind of a low-blow in the week after Eastwick's cancellation.
• It seems like half everyone's life is taken up by trying to find Jenny a date to one function or another.
• Hey, Serena, when one is trying to not flirt with one's boss, it's best to not wear backless mini dresses to work.
• Serena hasn't felt like this about anyone since Jude Law in Alfie? She feels like this about Tripp? Not Dan? Not greasy-haired Aaron? Not Carter? Not that con artist guy whose name I forget? Not Nate? Tripp? Why?
• Drug deals happen via mini sailboats in Central Park? Really? That seems like so much extra work.
• Didn't Jenny learn her lesson last year when Rufus had her ass hauled off to jail? Guess not.
• It's true: Nate has been in love trials and did have an affair with a married person.
• What the hell does Nate's mom want with Tripp? Mrs. Archibald's been MIA for a very long time.
• Why would Olivia be Snow White instead of Blair? The whole point of Snow White is that she has pale skin and dark hair.
• So are we seriously trying this Nate/Serena thing again? The GG writers always try to start it up, but then it immediately stops.
• Why are the dwarfs all taller than Snow White?
• Please stop making us relive the threesome.
• How does Nate's mom know that Tripp's wife staged the fake drowning? And why would she feel the need to tell Tripp?
• Well, dummy, this is why you shouldn't invite your boyfriend's best friend join you in a threesome.
• Did Hilary Duff use to be a singer? Or at least a "singer"?
• Thank you, Chuck, for finally putting an end to this madness. Chuck must be so exhausted; all he does is go around fixing everyone else's childish messes. Now if only he could rush down to NYU and fix this mess of a Snow White production...
• This Snow White thing is horrendous. "Painful" is the word that comes to mind. There is no way people are laughing at this. Unless they're laughing at this...as in they're laughing at horrendous it is.
• Stop making us relive the threesome!
• No way this helped Dan's chances of making it into the playwrighting program.
• Wow, Nate looks moody at Tripp barging in on his one-on-one time with Serena.
• SERENA!!! He's still married!!!!! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
• Ha ha, "Poker Face" is about Cyrus. (Wait, why was Cyrus playing poker with a student-age Lady Gaga? Oh nevermind.)
• Too bad Cyrus didn't make an appearance in this episode. He would have helped.
• How does "take a walk" equate to "go make out in my office"? Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid Serena.

Used to be, if I started watching a show, I'd watch it until the bitter end no matter what. These days, for whatever reason, I have a much quicker hook. I've already cut out Grey's Anatomy, Fringe, Heroes, FlashForward, etc. Gossip Girl is now officially on notice.

STYCYD: America Finally Gets A Vote

So You Think You Can Dance: Top 16 Performance Show

The play-by-play:

• Cat's got a snakeskin-esque knee-length black dress with long sleeves. She has paired the dress with smokey eyes and future hair.
• Ashleigh's pants during the intros are heinous.
• The Season 5 dancers are in attendance. Can't say I missed them all that much. They're in the midst of their tour.
• It's Jason! He's still such a cutie.
• Wow, I want to go to this Dizzy Feet party--Mary and Dmitry are going to do the samba!
• Also in attendance tonight is Dominic. I'm sorry, but his hair is just not looking good these days.

Karen and Kevin (Maria Torres hustle):

• The featurette: What?! Karen says she and her husband (whom she auditioned with but then got cut in Vegas) decided to get a divorce. So I guess we're lucky that they're not the married couple that made it into the Top 20; that could have been really awkward.
• The dance: The beginning seems more waltz-y than hustle-y. It picks up a bit in the middle. It looked a bit rough in places; other places looked good. Kevin did a nice jete. I feel like Kevin's always seems to have his back to the camera for some reason. The exit out of that final lift was not smooth at all.
• The judging: Nevertheless, Adam loved it. He says he just saw Kevin for the first time. He thinks it was "amazing" and "fantastic." Mary says Karen looked like a hustle queen out there. Lol at the replay of Kevin's face when they did the death drop; he looked absolutely terrified!

Ashleigh and Jakob (Mandy Moore jazz):

• The featurette: One of Jakob's best friends is Jeanine. Ha at the home video footage of them when Jakob had poofier hair but Jeanine looked exactly the same. Prop alert! This dance involves a cane.
• The dance: Ashleigh's wearing very similar pants to the ones Janette wore during Wade's criminals piece last season. They both wear them well, but those pants are terrible. Jacob is terrific. This was a very nice routine; it never quite got to epic level though.
• The judging: Adam points out that there was a cane mishap; Nigel didn't notice it. Lol, Jakob denies that any cane mishap occurred. Adam is astounded by Jakob's jumping ability and flexibility. Mary loves and adores both of them. Nigel says this routine comes up to the Table routine with Neil and Sabra, and Nigel kind of makes it sound like that routine was the only good routine Mandy ever choreographed.

Pauline and Peter (JT and Tomas quick step):

• The featurette: Peter volunteers to teach special needs people to dance. Wow, these two are getting hung out to dry tonight: they "drew" the quick step. At least there's a cute story to this one: Peter is a Navy serviceman and Pauline is a hula dancer.
• The dance: Not sure why a Navy serviceman and a hula dancer are doing the quick step, but whatever. These two absolutely look their parts, and they look adorable. The quick step itself was probably not great, but they gave it a heck of a try considering that it is completely alien to their styles.
• The judging: Adam really liked the performance. Mary says they pulled off the quick step due to their performance, but some of the leg actions and positions weren't quite right. Nigel points out some more technical flaws, but says he doesn't care because it was a fabulous performance. Nigel thinks this was the first time someone put a story put to a STYTCD quick step, and I'm skeptical about that claim, but too lazy to research it.

Kathryn and Legacy (Andy Blankenbuehler Broadway):

• The featurette: Kathryn recently went on a mission trip to Costa Rica. Legacy loves soccer. Score! A Broadway number not choreographed by Tyce!
• The dance: Kathryn is looking amazing in this. And Legacy's doing a good job of keeping up too! I liked this routine sooooo much better than the typical SYTYCD (Tyce) Broadway routine.
• The judging: Adam says he wasn't getting enough character out of Kathryn but that the dancing was adorable. Mary thought the routine was adorable, but that they lacked a little bit of choreography. Ok, the judges are harshing on Kathryn, but I thought she was fantastic. I don't get it. Nigel thinks she looked childish. Um, maybe that had something to do with the jean shorts/sneakers combo.

Channing and Victor (Stacey Tookey contemporary):

• The featurette: Lol, Channing makes lawnmower racing sound so exciting... Oh, look, it's another contemporary routine about a toxic relationship.
• The dance: Poor Channing had to do a lot of falling down/thrashing around the ground in this one. Victor got to do some too at the end. It was nice to see someone lift Channing without looking like he was about to lift a piano. Rather lovely all around, I'd say.
• The judging: The judges like this new partnership. They commend the quality of movement, without being deeply touched. Do you think Cat wakes up in the middle of the night yelling "1-888-83676-0_"?

Ellenore and Ryan (Lil C hip hop):

• The featurette: Ellenore has ancestors of 6 different nationalities. They are having some trouble finding Ryan's hip hop swagger.
• The dance: Why are there so many robbers on SYTYCD? Aside from toxic couples, robbers might be the most represented group of people. Uh, this doesn't really look good at all. Not sure if it's the dancing or the choreo or the heinous costumes. Ryan doesn't look like he knows what he's doing. He's also looking at Ellenore a lot, and I'm not sure if he's supposed to be doing that or if he's lost and needs help.
• The judging: Adam called Ellenore a "weird, funny girl." Uh, thanks? Adam says Ryan is "the most transformed dancer of the night"--well, sure, but not in a good way. Mary says Ellenore is too covered up; has she been possessed by Nigel? Mary points out that while Ryan may have done okay for a ballroomer, we're getting to the point in the competition where that's not going to be good enough. Finally, Nigel speaks the truth and says it was not good at all. Nigel: "You were just dancing, and you really can't do that in hip hop."

Mollee and Nathan (Gustavo Vargas salsa):

• The featurette: Something America doesn't know about Nathan is that he goes jet skiing...and perhaps there's a reason we don't know that; it's not particularly interesting. Ugh, I do not want to see "sexified Mollee" at all.
• The dance: This looks rough. You can tell Mollee's not a salsa dancer. She looks completely lost. I can't decide if Nathan's off too or if she's throwing him off.
• The judging: Adam says that routine exposed all of their weaknesses. How does Adam know that Mollee and Nathan are "fan favorites"? The fans have never gotten to vote yet! Mary says she could have gotten over the mishaps, but the feel and the style weren't there at all. Nigel says they didn't feel the music, missed connections and lost their chemistry. So much for all of Mollee's perkiness--she can barely manage to muster up the spirit to mug for the camera when they flash the phone number.

Noelle and Russell (Sean Cheesman Afro-jazz):

• The featurette: Russell is also an artist. In this dance, Russell is a frog and Noelle is an African princess.
• The dance: Can I get a "hell yeah!" on shirtless Russell? Russell is just too good. I don't know if Noelle's quite got the style--she looks a little stiffer than I would think you should be. The assisted flipping they did was really, really cool.
• The judging: Adam's on my nerves tonight. He's too focused on being cute and not focused enough on giving an actual critique. It's a problem when you're waiting to hear from Mary Murphy so you can get some substance. Mary says Russell is the king of Afro-jazz and says he's the first king on the Hot Tamale Train. Nigel takes another swipe at Russian folk dance! Aren't we over that by now? That's so summer of 2009.

My favorites:
Russell and Noelle Afro-jazz
Legacy and Kathryn Broadway
Victor and Channing contemporary

The judges single out Ryan and Ellenore and Mollee and Nathan as the couples in trouble. Geez! Even now that we're finally allowed to vote, the judges are still trying to boss us around!

I agree with the judges that Mollee and Nathan should be in the bottom three couples, but I suspect that the teeny boppers will save them so it's hard to predict who else will be dancing tomorrow night besides Ryan and Ellenore. Maybe Karen and Kevin and Channing and Victor, just because there was more fuss made about the other couples?

SYTYCD: The Top 20 (Kind Of) Compete

So You Think You Can Dance: Top 20 Performance/Elimination Show

I don't really appreciate that America doesn't get any kind of say in who goes home this week. I know the World Series messes up the schedule, but they could have done the regular competition last night and the results tonight. The judges just picked the Top 20--if America wasn't going to get a say until next week, the judges might as well have just picked the Top 18 right off the bat.

The play-by-play:

• Cat is wearing an Asian-inspired red mini dress with 1940s hair and red lips.
• Billy Bell became very ill so he's out of the competition. (I heard he broke his hand, but Nigel's really hitting the word "ill" hard here.)
• Additionally, Noelle had an accident and her leg is in a massive brace thing. And apparently she gets a free pass this week. Interesting. In Season 3, when Jessie didn't dance during the performance show, she still had to dance for her life the next night (even though Pasha, her partner, received enough votes to be safe) and ultimately went home. They are employing entirely different rules now.
• So choreographer Melanie has to sub in again! She's the only person who has ever had to do that on SYTYCD, and she's had to do it twice now!

Channing and Phillip (Jason Gilkison jive):

• The featurette: This is not the most dynamic pairing ever. Oh dear, Phillip does spoken word.
• The dance: Well, SYTYCD couldn't do its Michael Jackson tribute, but they do get to use "Rockin' Robbin" by The Jackson 5. Channing looks hot in her feathery outfit. This performance was not bad. It didn't look entirely effortless though; they looked like they were thinking pretty hard about everything.
• The judging: Adam liked it, Mary says it was "not bad" (I think that's the exact phrase I just used) but SHE. WANTS. MORE. Nigel wants Channing to get her weight over her toes more so she can bounce.

Ashleigh and Jakob (Tyce Diorio Broadway):

• The featurette: Oh no, Jakob got saddled with Ashleigh! BTW, Ash couldn't dance for 6 years due to illness and injury. Oh no, Jakob got saddled with Tyce! Tyce says Ash and Jakob need "to find that man/woman thing."
• The dance: Why is Ashleigh's dress looking navy when Jakob's wearing a lot of black? Wow, Jakob can leap like nobody's business. Well, I liked Jakob, but I could take or leave Ashleigh on that one.
• The judging: Jakob is sweating up a storm. Adam says that Jakob is amazing and it will be hard for Ashleigh to keep up with him. Mary thinks Ashleigh was phenomenal and that she didn't think Ashleigh was capable of dancing as well as she just did. Mary to Jakob: "Everything you do is just kind of perfect!" Nigel calls Jakob one of the most gifted dancers ever on the show (and he adds that Billy Bell was too). Nigel goes so far as to say that Jakob will go very far in the competition and will take Ashleigh "to the finals as well" is she continues to dance well. Um, I hope not?

Ariana and Peter (Tabitha and Napoleon hip hop):

• The featurette: Napoleon and Tabitha are sooooooo annoying. The dance is about androids.
• The dance: Peter can to some b-boy style tricks. There is an awful lot of head banging in this routine. Too much, I'd say. Apparently, androids act as though they're at a grunge rock concert in the early '90s? The dancing also wasn't really the best display of hip hop ever.
• The judging: Adam says they weren't dancing similarly. Then he does a Lil C impression. Mary loved the beginning but thought it was sloppy in the middle. Nigel was disappointed by these two for the first time. Could it be because this was the first time he's had to watch them do a NappyTabs routine (not counting the group routine in Vegas)?

Noelle and Russell (Tony and Melanie fox trot):

• The featurette: Hahahahaha! Melanie has to dance with Russell! This is going to be classic! It's not every day you see a krumper try the fox trot...
• The dance: Melanie looks hot, and Russell is so debonair! I loved it! I think they should make Melanie dance with someone every week.
• The judging: Adam can't believe how fantastic Russell is. Mary takes her hair off to Russell. She says he did a respectable job. Nigel says Russell's rise and fall wasn't good, but his lines were.

Bianca and Victor (Travis Wall contemporary):

• The featurette: Bianca's living in L.A., and the only family she has with her is her little dog. Victor says he is very colorful. It's Travis!!!!!! YEEEEEEAAAaaa!
• The dance: Victor's got really nice lines. Very cool lifts and, uh, tanglings. Travis has done it again! Awesome, awesome routine. What was interesting is that the male/female dynamic in this was very reminiscent of the relationship in the Bench Dance that Travis performed with Heidi.
• The judging: Adam says Bianca's head and knees are good, but her shoulders and toes need work. He loved Victor. Mary loved them both. Nigel says that they were the most connected partners so far. And, of course, everyone loves Travis. (Let's do a SYTYCD: All-Stars, folks!)

Karen and Kevin (Tony and Melanie cha cha):

• The featurette: Karen is from Venezuela. Kevin is a model.
• The dance: Ha ha ha! they're dancing to the Glee version of "Push It." Karen's outfit is very skimpy. I don't think Kevin quite has this down. He looks uncomfortable. Karen did ok, but I was distracted by her dress. The dance seemed slow.
• The judging: Adam says Karen looks "aaaRUUUgaaa!" and those who know him know that's not really his thing. Mary said Kevin was rhythmical and sexy but not sharp enough. Shocker, Nigel's "gaga" over Karen. He thinks Kevin danced it quite well.

Ellenore and Ryan (Sonya Tayeh contemporary jazz):

• The featurette: Ryan likes to work out. Ellenore's parents were dancers. The dance is about two angelic creatures: a bad one (Ryan) and a good one (Ellenore).
• The dance: The style of movement in this is very prototypical Sonya. Ellenore is good. I wouldn't say that was one of the best routines in SYTYCD history, though. I think Ellenore oversold it in the featurette a bit. It wasn't as good as "The Garden."
• The judging: Adam says they just became two of the most exciting dancers on the show. Mary thought the chemistry was crazy. Nigel says Ryan totally took him by surprise.

Well, that was ominous. Cat just said the judges are going to have to send two dancers home tonight and they cut straight to Pauline and Brandon, who appear to be dressed for a waltz.

Pauline and Brandon (Jason Gilkison smooth waltz):

• The featurette: Pauline likes photography. Brandon is a hip hop dancer who just showed up. Ugh, poor Brandon: he's a hip hopper who just got called in and now he's got to do a waltz.
• The dance: I'm not a waltz expert, but Pauline looks gorgeous when she turns in that flowy dress. The part where they were actually in a hold and waltzing looked a little rough, but everything else looked lovely.
• The dance: Brandon's only been here for a day and a half!!! Adam thinks they did a great job in a difficult situation. Mary liked their chemistry, considering how little time they had to work on it. Mary begins a sentence to Brandon with "if you continue on..." so that sure doesn't bode well for him. Nigel says it wasn't strong enough in his opinion.

We are just tearing through these performances tonight!

Kathryn and Legacy (Dave Scott hip hop):

• The featurette: Goofy caveman hip hop.
• The dance: This is good. And a very strong argument for sending NappyTabs packing. Kathryn was rather good for a non-hip hopper.
• The judging: Adam loved it. Mary screams "Yabba dabba do!" and the continues to shriek for quite a while. All three judges heartily commend Dave Scott. Yes, that's what good hip hop choreography looks like, folks.

Mollee and Nathan (Doriana Sanchez disco):

• The featurette: Did they seriously pair up Nathan and Mollee?! Whyyyyyy? There's no reason to isolate the two young ones--Chelsie Hightower was young when she was on the show and she did fine dancing with Mark. But my real reluctance about this pairing stems the fact that I like Nathan but am annoyed by Mollee. And to make it worse, they're making them do disco! Nathan looks ridiculous in that white outfit. Nathan plays the piano and the trumpet.
• The dance: Something looks off to me about Mollee's arm movements. Nathan's still great. They pulled off some very cool lifts quite well. I liked her doing splits while Nathan pulled her across the floor.
• The judging: The judges commend them both for their energy and spirit.

My favorite dances of the night:

• Bianca and Victor's contemporary
• Russell and Melanie's fox trot
• Kathryn and Legacy's hip hop

Now the judges are going to pick two guys and two guys to dance solos. They will be judged on everything the judges know about them from all season.

Dancing will be: Ariana, Brandon, Pauline and Russell.

RUSSELL?!?! WHAT NONSENSE IS THIS?!? So, theoretically, he could be sent home tonight for his fox trot, while his partner (Noelle) got injured and gets to go straight through to next week without even having to dance! Perhaps if Russell had known about this loophole, he would have faked an injury! Hell, if I were a dancer on this show, I'd plan to develop some sort of "injury" as soon as I drew the quick step.

Also, Ashleigh doesn't have to dance for her life tonight? I think Pauline is getting a little screwed over.

Ariana's solo: Wearing kind of a frilly purple dress. She did a nice, powerful solo.

Russell's solo: Russell has one heck of a buck krump face. He dances with such aggression and passion. If the judges kick him off tonight, they won't be able to make it out of the building.

Pauline's solo: Opens with some nice pirouettes. It had nice energy, but there wasn't too much else going on. It kind of looked like a ballroomer's solo.

Brandon's solo: I think he's hip hopping to a John Mayer track Interesting choice. It was pretty but rather low-key. After the sheer force of nature that was Russell's solo, poor Brandon doesn't have a chance.

This group seems really big on making little heart shapes with their hands.

The girls: Ariana is cut. Nigel says she's a remarkable dancer but that they'd like to see more love in her eyes. If I were her, I wouldn't be looking at the judges with love in my eyes right now.

The guys: Holy crap! Nigel just scared the crap out of me when he told Russell they hope he will keep learning new styles of dance. What a dumbass thing to say--of course Russell will continue to learn new styles since he's staying in the competition. What else is he supposed to do? Pull "contemporary" out of the hat and flat out refuse to do it? Krump while his partner is doing a mambo?

But, anyway, Brandon is going home. Nigel says he'll talk to FOX and the powers that be and try to get a rule exception so that Brandon can try out for the show again next year. (Typically, once you make the Top 20, you can't try again in another season.) That's really only fair, because Brandon really didn't make the Top 20 and only stepped in a the last minute to help out. His experience wasn't a typical Top 20 experience; he didn't have the opportunities to prepare and practice that everyone else did, so it would really suck if this 2-day experience precluded him from having the chance to participate more fully in the future.

Seriously, why did they put Russell in the bottom two? Based on tonight's performances, in addition to Brandon, I would have ranked Peter, Kevin and probably Phillip all below Russell. Aside from the stupid comment about hoping he'll continue to learn new styles, Nigel didn't even give Russell any actual constructive criticism or advice. He certainly didn't get the "show more passion" line. I'm guessing the judges just wanted to see him krump? Or rally his supporters for the future? I don't know.

Let's hope that SYTYCD will get a handle on what they're doing after the World Series is over. These fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants rule/format alterations aren't working very well.

Greek: A Cyprus-Rhodes Thanksgiving

Greek:

"The Wish-Pretzel"

It's Thanks- giving on Greek! There is a long and storied history of great Thanksgiving-themed television episodes. My favorites include The O.C.'s epic "The Homecoming" episode, Gossip Girl's solid season 1 Thanksgiving episode, the episode of The Cosby Show where Cliff had to keep going out in the rain for groceries, the fantastic Thanksgiving episode of Now and Again, the episode of Gilmore Girls where Lorelai and Rory ate four (three?) Thanksgiving dinners, and the list goes on.

While it's a little odd to see a Thanksgiving episode a month or so early, I really enjoyed Greek's Thanksgiving effort. Beaver, Wade and Heath were hilarious. Evan was gorgeous. Dale caused some trouble...what's not to love? Oh, that's right, the ending. Sorry, folks, but I've been unequivocally on Team Evan ever since he stopped hitting other people's sweet little brothers with paddles. I fell off the Cappie/Casey bandwagon a couple of mini-seasons ago when I grew tired of their longing stares. I still like them both though, so I figured I'd be okay with their pairing, but when they kissed at the end of the episode, I realized I wasn't. It will be okay though; I'll get over it. (As long as Greek doesn't force the Evan/Rebecca pairing. I will seriously barf.)

The highlights and my other observations:

• Rebecca: "You could pay me to stay longer, but I don't have an electric bill."
• So Casey's going home and Rusty's not? Ha ha ha! Their parents went to Maui and Casey didn't know about it because she doesn't listen to her mom's or Rusty's voicemail messages.
• Hey, if Casey wants to sleep with someone, she could just sleep with Dale. Just throwing that out there... (Actually, now that Dale's back to his Christian ways, I guess he's abstaining again.)
• Geez, Evan's so cute. And that shirt is really working for him.
• Evan: "I'll drive! Get it?"
  Cappie: "Well, that'd be funny if you still had your car."
  Evan: "Yeah. You should drive."
  Cappie: "Yeah, I will."
• Evan's not doing so well with his attempts at golf puns lately.
• Rebecca: "You really do think that your life is a romantic comedy, don't you?"
• Wow, the KT house is the place to be! Wade, Beaver and Heath are all still there!
• Yes, it's okay for you to try for the grant, Rusty.
• If Rebecca has a rain machine, how can she even hear the creepy house noises?
• That's nice of Casey to volunteer by delivering Thanksgiving meals to the elderly.
• Ha ha at the KTs totally misinterpreting the clue about the pool table.
• Cappie: "'...I'm hiding under the trash can in the smelliest room of the house.'"

  Heath: "The bathroom!"

  Wade: "The kitchen!"

  Beaver: "Could be anywhere."
• There are an awful lot of people in the lab on Thanksgiving! I know they're science geeks, but this is ridiculous! There are like 30 people in that room. It's Thanksgiving!
• How did Cappie not know that Heath is graduating? I've know that for months.
• Beaver: "You didn't know, Cap? I thought you knew everything. I'm so disillusioned right now."
• Heath: "And if anyone's secretly gay and wants to declare their love for me, that would be the time."
• Cappie had Evan's phone number filed under "LAME-bers" in his cell phone. Ha!
• I knew that Cappie bailing on Evan would send Evan right to Casey! YEA!
• Yeah, I really don't think that Rusty would want Evan showing up to his Thanksgiving dinner.
• Beaver, Cappie and Wade's reactions to Heath's suggestion to steal all of the Omega Chi's underwear were hilarious.
• Beaver: "You don't want to prank the Omega Chis. It's like Bizarro Cappie!"
• Beaver: "You used to live for risk! And Shoots and Ladders!"
• Ha ha ha ha!!! That guy put on Ashleigh's hideous cloud cardigan!!!!
• Casey: "Well, looks like all he took was that one shirt. What an odd choice!"
• Noooooooooooo, Casey! Don't push Evan away! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! OH, I am so saddened by this turn of events! Wrong choice, Casey! Wrong choice...
• Rebecca: "I chased him for three blocks before I realized we're doing Ash a favor by letting him keep that shirt."
• Heath: "No Omega Chi is stepping foot in this house without getting pounded! ...by my fist! ...in the face! I don't know..."
• Aww! The KT's Thanksgiving meal is like the one in Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving! How adorable is that!
• Aww, poor Evan.
• Aren't there lights in this lab? Dale and Rusty are working in the dark! Rusty better get that bulb to light up, or they're not going to be able to find their way out of the room!
• The fractured state of Rusty/Dale hurts my heart.

Sometimes I am so in tune with the powers that be at Greek that I think they read my blog--like when they randomly bring back and ruthlessly mock Ashleigh's heinous cloud/rainbow sweater that I've made fun of on numerous occasions (such as here and here). But then they go and put Casey back with Cappie, and it's clear that they're not listening to me at all :-P

Uh oh, the preview for next week makes it look like they kill somebody or something. I hope it's not Fisher! Or Beaver! Or Dale! Or Heath! (Oh no, it totally could be Heath since he's graduating and presumably leaving the show anyway!)

I'm bummed that next episode is the finale of this mini-season. I'm going to miss my favorite college kids.

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Greek: A Four Pack of Disaster

Greek:

"Fight the Power"

I liked this episode (although, to be fair, do I ever actually not like an episode of Greek?), but I've had more than enough of this whole "the ZBZs are fourth, and it's a big disaster" story line. But of course I'm going to like an episode that featured this much Evan/Casey interaction as well as a healthy smattering of Dale.

Highlights and my observations:

• Ashleigh: "Look at the happy faces on all the children!"
• Beaver: "It's harder than it looks. You have to stop drinking at the end of the snore."
  Heath: "Or you get penalized."
  Beaver: "Ha, you just said penalized!"
• Beaver: "You're on the moon right now, aren't you! You're a hologram!"
• Evan: "Fore!"

  Ashleigh: "We get it, we're number four. You don't have to rub it in."
• Evan: "You know, some people appreciate my sense of humor."
  Ashleigh: "Some people appreciate Crocs."
• Evan: "Oh, and watch out for those sand traps! ...That wasn't funny at all."
• Lana messing with Rusty is pretty entertaining.
• Cappie: "Again, can you just assure me that we're not having sex with Spitter tonight?"
• Good for Cappie for leaving money on the table instead of dining and dashing. (That would probably be a bad thing to do at an establishment that they frequent.)
• Except for Evan and Calvin, these Omega Chis are a bunch of jerks.
• Hahahaha! Ashleigh's dress has a lobster on it! I kinda love it.
• I can't believe everyone in the sorority sits down and eats dinner at the same time! Does that actually happen anywhere in real life (in sororities)?
• Ashleigh: "And then I introduced her to tweezers, and she stole my boyfriend."
• Rusty: "I never watched so many episodes of one TV show since that Joan of Arcadia marathon with my parents."
• Rusty is kind of acting like he recently sustained a head wound.
• Rusty: "Oooh! That whale just ate that whole seal!"
• Ok, Calvin, let's just kick that Grant to the curb. I'm totally over him. Calvin needs to hook back up with Heath before he graduates.
• DALE!!!!
• Can Rusty please date Lana? Because that would be all kinds of awesome.
• Frown-y cupcakes! I think being fourth is worth it if the ZBZs get free baked goods!
• Lana: "I don't date guys with issues."
  Dale: "Someone without a college degree shouldn't be so choosy."
• It is kind of curious that the Omega Chis put up with Evan when he was super rich and very mean, but now that he's nice and poor, they're planning a mutiny.
• No wonder the Gamma Psis are the new number one sorority--they've got a bowl full of chocolate bunnies in their living room!
• Ha ha, Dale at a strip club.
• Dale: "Hi, I have a friend of mine I'd like to introduce you too! His name is Jesus, and He pays much greater dividends than those dollar bills in your underpants."
• This is quite a fancy party.
• Rebecca: "What was that? Do you have something against mid-fielders?"
• Oh HELL nooooooooooooooooooo!!! DO. NOT. START. ANYTHING. WITH. EVAN. AND. REBECCA! I will LITERALLY barf!
• Rusty: "Are you growing up?"

  Cappie: "You shut your damn mouth!"
• I think Rusty has lost his darn mind. He seriously seems like he's been concussed recently.
• Katherine: "My policy on parties is basically a 5-minute walk-through, but I rather enjoyed the caricatures this evening and he captured my likeness, so I stayed a little longer."
• This Natalie girl (the Gamma Psi president) kind of cracks me up too. The Gamma Psis seem like an entertaining bunch. I'd rather watch them than Rebecca and the annoying ZBZ pledges.
• Dale: "Why was that dollar bill wet?"
• Now Rusty has a head wound! He finally has an excuse for how strangely he's acting.
• Dale: "Jesus knows how to party! The dude makes His own wine."
• It's nice to see Dale back to his old prostelytizing.
• Ha ha at Cappie, Rusty and Dale doing shots of sparkling cider.
• So Rusty really can't date Lana now that Cappie doesn't want her anymore?
• Dale: "Oh no, I think I see where this is headed."
• Ashleigh: "And they sleep where they poop. You can't trust a bunny."

And--what has it been now?--nine or so episodes after Casey dumped her boyfriend for him, it looks like Cappie is finally going to get around to try to get with her in next week's episode. Ugh, I want to like the prospect of Casey finally getting with Cappie, but I'm just so tired of him. I feel like we've had at least four different versions of Evan so far during the run of Greek, but Cappie has remained basically the same this whole time. Not that it's a bad thing that Cappie hasn't veered from jerk to sweetie to paddle-hitter to depressed guy and then back to sweetie--it means that Cappie is actually the more stable of the two. But it also means that we've had an awful lot of exposure to Cappie's shtick. And, while I still find him funny, I've grown tired of his overall act. (And Evan is just so cute!)

So are we headed for the re-pairing of Cappie and Casey, to be followed by her drifting towards Evan due to a combination of Cappie's Cappie-ness and Evan's sweetness (in other words, a complete repeat of what happened during their freshman year)?

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Gossip Girl: Toast Disasters

Gossip Girl:
"Enough About Eve"

So Chuck kissed a dude, and this episode was still kind of a snooze. It's like it's a new rule that at least two of Gossip Girl's plot lines per episode have to be almost painfully dull (Serena/Nate/poker and Vanessa/Dan/Olivia). I was even frustrated with Blair's shenanigans, because I had a hard time believing that everyone cared so much about who gave the speech at a freshman parents' dinner. I'm surprised that NYU could even get people to go to that dinner, let alone that it would spark epic battles over who got to speak at it. I don't know, I just think that if Blair's going to let her ambitions screw up her relationship with Chuck, she might as well be aiming a bit higher than giving the toast at a dinner for NYU parents. (Neither of Blair's parents even attended, which is a disappointment because I love Margaret Colin and John Shea, and Dorota wasn't even there.) Seriously, is anyone going to remember the stupid toast a week from now?

Also, have any of these students who "go to NYU" (or Nate who "goes to Columbia") ever actually gone to a class?

If the whole "Chuck kisses a boy" thing was a stunt to get ratings, it doesn't look like it worked.

One good thing about this episode was that Gina Torres a.k.a. Anna Espinosa of Alias turned up as Vanessa's mother. Unfortunately, the uncoolness of being in a Vanessa storyline tempered the awesomeness that is Anna Espinosa a bit. Here's a reminder of how great she can be. (The video's in German, but who cares: Anna tries to hit Sydney with the arm of a mannequin! Ha!)

Highlights and my observations:

• Chuck: "Bad dream? Don't tell me it was Charade again. I know how terrifying you find Walter Matthau."
• Aww, Chuck is so sweet holding Blair when she told him her dream was "All About Eve."
• Why wait to have Tripp run for Congress? Because he's only like 25 years old?
• Don't worry, Nate has an idea. Oh, I feel so much better now.
• There was a cover story on Vanessa on the cover of the NYU paper? Are you kidding me? Gag.
• Jenny (to Dan): "People like you more when they meet our family." THEY DO?!?! I'm sorry, but meeting Rufus would not make me like anyone better.
• Serena's dress does not really same day-appropriate. It looks like a party dress.
• I cannot believe people actually care who gives the toast at the freshmen dinner. I cannot believe people want to go to that.
• They were playing Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros' "Home" very quietly in the background during Vanessa's phone call. That song was easily the highlight of this whole episode. I'm a big fan of that song. They should have just canned all of this toast nonsense and these poker shenanigans and just played that whole song.
• Uh oh, Vanessa's lying. I thought she didn't lie.
• I didn't know poker could make for such boring television.
• Oh, nice work Serena and Nate. I told you that you should never feel too confident in one of Nate's plans.
• By far the coolest thing about Vanessa ever: her mother is Anna Espinosa (Gina Torres) from Alias. If Anna Espinosa is really supposed to be Vanessa's mother, Vanessa should be a whole a lot cooler.
• Oh, that Nate! Such a little sneak! There's no way Nate came up with this plan on his own. This was definitely Grandpa Vanderbilt's idea.
• Why is Olivia asking Vanessa why Dan doesn't want her to meet his parents, when Dan's standing 20 feet away from her right now!
• Ha ha! Dan just set the kitchen on fire.
• Ha ha, a kiss from Chuck Bass is #27 on the Tribeca Scavenger Hunt.
• Geez, Chuck's haircut is amazing. He looks super hot. I cannot get over it.
• Wow, this distinguished alumni isn't very upstanding. He had the "important job" of picking the speaker and he traded it away for a kiss from Chuck Bass? (Although, I can't say I really blame him...)
• This is quite a fancy freshmen dinner event.
• Why did Olivia change out of that pretty purple dress and into that way too tight orange thing? Ick.
• Chuck: "Keep up, Bambi."
• Wow, Serena can't even follow Nate's grandpa's scheme. It's not that complex, S. If she can keep up with all of Blair's schemes, she should be able to follow this one.
• Geez, Vanessa, piss off the few people left who can still tolerate you. Nice going.
• If Carter thinks Serena's going to give a flying crap about him in three years after he goes away to work on the oil rig, he's got another thing coming.
• Oof, that's rough. Vanessa just got a lecture on being a good person from Anna Espinosa! Ha!
• Rufus: "Dan, was that Blair on the P.A.? She really should have run that speech by someone."
• Damn, Chuck looks hot. It's distracting!
• Yeah, I don't believe that Blair's never going to manipulate Chuck again. Chuck should kick her ass to the curb.
• At least now we get to here some more of "Home"! It's helping to make all of Vanessa's screen time easier to stomach.

(photo: cwtv.com)

Greek: Truth & Comic-Consequences

Greek:
"The Dork Knight"

Strong episode: there were some interesting Cappie/Casey/Evan developments, and I always love a Rusty/Dale/Calvin road trip.

Highlights and my observations:

• Rusty: "So that's when I said, 'Oliver? I barely know her!'"
• Dale: "It's practically expected for me to be loose with my morals and my genitals."
• Haha at Casey stalking Evan and Cappie and making Ash hide behind park benches with her.
• Ashleigh: "Do you even take classes here anymore?"
• Evan: "You know what they say, cleanliness is next to godliness, and you don't want to piss off God!"
• Wow, Evan looks hot in his cleaning outfit.
• Rusty: "She already has friends in New York. What, do they sit around Central Perk? Talk about what to name Rachel's baby?"
• Dale: "As an atheist now, I say, 'Do 'em if you got 'em.'"
• Yea! It's Fisher! It is nice not to have to rely on that Taco Bell commercial to get my Fisher fix (although he is rather good in that commercial).
• Fisher: "So, what do you want to do, girlfriend? That sounded weird, didn't it?"
• Clueless! Fisher has never seen Clueless?! WHAT?!
• "Chambers maid"
• Well, I thought Evan's cleanliness "joke" was cute :-)
• Ha ha, Cappie says he and Evan are vigilante crime fighters.
• Evan is really good at acting like he still hates Cappie.
• Oh no! This Evan/Cappie "fight" started out cute, but now there are frat brothers involved and there is punching and biting! Not good.
• Ashleigh: "I think Clueless is one of the greatest movies in the history of movies!" (You and me both, Ash.)
• Aww, Fisher didn't like Clueless. What a loser ;-)
• Dale: "Vampira69 just told a Twilight joke that would make your ears bleed!"
• Dale: "Dude, comic book conventions are just crawling with hotties! Everyone know that."
  Rusty: "Yeah! No, they don't."
• Casey: "I'm like the worst detective ever."
  Ashleigh: "Oh, stop. Remember Inspector Gadget? He needed a dog and a 10-year-old girl to solve anything."
  
• Is there really an Ohio River Comic-Con?
  
• Poor Calvin. The more he hangs out with Rusty and Dale, the sorrier I feel for him. Nevertheless, I'd totally love to hang out with Rusty and Dale.
  
• Couldn't Cappie and Evan tell Casey they're friends again, but not tell her about the secret society? They could make up some other reason that they became friends again.
  
• Ashleigh says this "seems like the longest semester ever."
  
• Cappie: "Do we just play around it?"
  Beaver: "Like putt-putt? ...Yeah."
  
  
• Cappie: "Ohh, you sucking suck sucker!"
  
  
• Cappie: "Hey, why are kittens called 'kittens'? They're little cats; shouldn't they be called 'cattens'?"
  
  
• I loved how Beaver and Cappie's statistic-laden contraception conversation made Casey think they knew about the walkie talkie.
  
  
• Lol, Calvin's favorite show used to be Leopard Boy. "His mom is human, but his dad is leopard. He solves his mysteries at this posh Caribbean resort."
  
  
• Oh NO! Vampira69 is Sheila! Noooooo!
  
  
• Oh, Rusty... His interaction with the green girl was not smooth at all.
  
  
• Even the contraception PSA with Cappie and Beaver was entertaining.
  
  
• Wow, go Casey! She's in Amphora now!
  
  
• Uh oh, now Casey has to do the Amphora emotional purge. That could get sticky.
  
  
• Look at Calvin's Leopard Boy hat!
  
  
• Calvin's face when he saw Sheila in the outfit was hilarious.
  
  
• Aww, Casey still feels guilty about her role in breaking up Cappie and Evan.
  
  
• Sheila: "Sounds like somebody could use a little self-esteem."
  
• Cappie: "Goonies really does hold up."
  
• Rusty: "Jordan told me to get a life in front of 300 people who live in their parents' basements."
  
• Ok, this Cappie/Casey/Evan friendship is great and all, but surely they all realize that it's going to come crashing down on them the second Casey gets back together with either Cappie or Evan.
  
• Dale: "I was clinging to this notion of me as a sexy, atheist super villain, but that's not me. I mean, I'm sexy, but I'm not an atheist, and I'm not a super villain."
  
• Ha at Calvin singing the Leopard Boy theme song.
  
• Fisher: "Leg warmers are not gloves!"
  
• Poor Ashleigh's arm warmers are taking a beating this season! Rebecca already made fun of them.
  
• Aww, good for Dale. Even though Greek plays his faith for laughs 90% of the time, it's nice that Greek at least acknowledges that some college kids are religious.
  

(photo: abcfamily.com)

Gossip Girl: Marry Me, Lil

Gossip Girl:
"Rufus Getting Married"

I'd say this was by far the best episode of Gossip Girl so far this season. Unfortunately, that's more a commentary on how sub-par the other episodes have been rather than the excellence of this one. Still though, I think it's impressive how watchable this episode was, given the large amount of Rufus/Lily drama it contained. (I've been over the two of them since the season one finale when they decided they loved each other and she married Bart anyway.)

Highlights and my observations:

• I'm sorry, Dan, but your "say hi to Godzilla for me" IM joke was not nearly that funny!
• How does Blair know she hates Nate's new girlfriend? Has she even seen Nate in months?
• Since when does Vanessa not like Georgie? I thought Vanessa was Georgie's great champion.
• Blair: "Do you happen to know what the Swahili is for 'mind your own beeswax'? No reason, of course, it just might be useful on a safari sometime."
• Blair: "Trust me, Nate, I know women, and none of us are that nice."
• Hey, look, it's Jenny and Eric, just wandering around the apartment in a pack as usual. They are like the chorus in Greek drama--they don't really factor into the plot much and just pop up occasionally to say something that advances the story.
• Dan: "You've been running? With jeans on? That didn't chafe?"
• No, Serena, don't waste your time trying to get Rufus and Lily together. I, for one, could not care less anymore. Just let it go.
• Vanessa: "...and C, even though I tried to defend you, you're a full-on crazy person."
• Georgina: "That was just pathetic! Haven't you ever tried to get somebody to dump a celebrity before?"
• Rufus: "I knew I let you kids watch The Parent Trap too many times."
• Holy crap, Chuck is one hot masseuse!
• Blair's voice when she said, "Hey, where are you going? I have tension!" sounded extremely reminiscent of Cher Horowitz in Clueless when she said, "Even Fabion, my masseuse, said I had a lot of tension in my back." Like so reminiscent that it was either a direct send-up or borderline plagiarism.
• Vanessa's wearing a lot of jewelry for a long afternoon of Photoshopping.
• When Rufus and Lily see each other, they piss each other of in a matter of seconds, but then they both look at a photo, and suddenly they're in love again and everything's perfect. Uh, that's because the photo doesn't talk back, people! This detente is going to last for like 5 minutes.
• I still don't understand how Jenny can rule Constance with that hair!
• Oh, Jenny's used to making dresses in one night. Not sure Lily's going to want to wear whatever she comes up with though.
• I liked Serena calling the Constance girls "new mean girls."
• Georgina got Poppy deported? Was Poppy not an American? Whatever, thanks for that belated explanation...
• Dan: "Turns out, she was dating Orlando Bloom behind my back."
  Georgina: "It is amazing how far down that guy's Star-O-Meter has gone."
  
• Chuck: "I'm getting sick of being your travel agent. This ticket's the last, and it's one-way."
  
• I like Serena's dress, but it looks like she needs to give it a hard tug upwards.
  
• Jenny's dress is not my favorite.
  
• If Rufus is never happier than when he's with Lily, he must have been one tremendously depressed dude during pre-Lily. He sure doesn't look happy to me when he's with her.
  
• I'm not sure if that dress is Jenny's best work. It's definitely not her worst work though.
  
• Nice, Lily. Snap at the one child of yours who doesn't already know what a loser you are.
  
• Oh, yeah, Bree did mention that her BFF cousin was jilted at the alter. I remember that now, but I still don't care.
  
• Scott sure travels light. He came all the way from Boston without a bag or a jacket or anything?
  
• This is great; you just find out your son is alive and you just ignore him while you continue your previous conversation.
  
• One way or another, this Rufus-and-Lily-getting-married thing is going to make Serena and Dan's eventual wedding really awkward.
  
• Vanessa's an "all's well that ends well kind of girl"? Really?
  
• Yeah, Bree, please leave. And if you happen to pass Vanessa on your way out, take her with you.
  

Once again, Georgie proves ridiculously easy to get rid of. This time Dorota and the doorman took care of it! And, is flying Georgina off somewhere with the doorman really vengeance on Georgina? It seems like more of a punishment for the doorman to me...

But, seriously, Georgie liked Dan enough to go up to New England to hunt down his secret half-brother and bring him back, but then she's just going to drop the big news and skedaddle? I was expecting her to completely lose it and lock Dan up in the closet of her dorm room and make him wear funny outfits (a la Jan Spears on Days of Our Lives) or something. Frankly, I'm disappointed.

I had expected that Mercy would have gone belly-up by the time that Georgie's last episode aired, freeing Michelle Tractenberg up to make a swift return to GG, but so far Mercy hasn't been canceled (probably because there's no one from The O.C. on it) so I guess NYU will be Georgina-free for awhile.



(photo: cwtv.com)

Greek: Helper-ish Friends

Greek:

"Lost and Founders"

I've got a major blogging backlog, so just the highlights:

• Evan to the rescue! He's wearing a striped shirt and no tie! He looks so casual.
• "Evan Keller"
• Still no Dale?!?! What the hell, people? Come on.
• Make up a story, Rusty. Say Jordan's not there because she had a family emergency or something. Think on your feet a little.
• Ashleigh literally looks like she's dressed as a sailor for a Halloween party. Is that going to impress the alumnae? I wouldn't give money to somebody in that get-up.
• Rusty told the professor that Jordan had a hair dryer accident! Lol. Nice work, Rusty.
• Ash: "Look at the plus side, at least we'll both know what you're doing."
• Lana: "Are you warming up to using that line on a 16-year-old?"
• Cappie: "Friends are fun. I think Plato said that...or Elmo."
• Serving shirtless can't be part of Evan's job description.
• Rusty's glare at Grant (when he was telling Jordan you don't need to go to college to be a photographer) was pretty funny.
• Ashleigh looks far less ridiculous in her wood nymph costume than she did in that sailor outfit that was supposed to be real clothes.
• Casey: "She mentioned she has an 8 a.m. class she hates, but who can blame her? Brains don't work that early."
• Maybe Jordan needs a faculty advisor--it shouldn't be Rusty's job to get her into a different major.
• Casey: "So how do you two know each other?"
  Lana: "Fight club. Damn, I broke the first rule."
  Cappie: "And the second rule."
• That Lana is kind of hilarious. In fact, she and Cappie together might be too funny.
• Ahahaha! Nate is Doris' "helper-ish friend." That sounds creepy.
• Lana: "What does a helper-ish friend do?"

  Cappie: "Besides making a great meal out of hamburger?"
• Cappie's getting some decent mileage out of his Plato/Elmo joke.
• Ha ha at Evan trying to warn Casey about Nate after a conversation consisting of just "Where are you from?"/"Baltimore."
• Ok, "Steven Hawking and the naughty science girl" is about the creepiest thing ever. Poor Calvin.
• Eesh, Nate is skeazy. Casey really knows how to pick 'em, huh?
• This whole episode makes Evan look like a tremendous judge of character.
• Just let Jordan drop out already! I can't take anymore of her!
• Please no more of this Rusty/Jordan stuff. It's excruciating.
• Yea for Cappie and Evan coercing Nate into confessing.
• Cappie: "I still say he's doing the old lady."
• Not only was there no Dale, but there was also no Beaver or any of the KTs other than Cappie and Rusty. Also no Fisher.

(photo: abcfamily.com)

The Big Bang Theory: Some Like It Goth

The Big Bang Theory:

"The Gothowitz Deviation"

Since I enjoyed reading The Big Bang Theory's fancy article on NYTimes.com today, I decided to blog about tonight's episode, which was hilarious as usual.

Highlights and my observations:

• Sheldon: "While I subscribe to the many worlds theory that posits the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons in an infinite number of universes, I assure you that in none of them am I dancing."
• Sheldon: "Dear Lord, are you still going to be here on french toast day?"
• Sheldon: "I can't be impossible; I exist! I believe what you meant to say was 'I give up! You're improbable!'"
• Sheldon: "Ohh, Penny, it's as if the Cheesecake Factory is run by witches!"
• Ha ha ha at Howard in the goth outfit! He's kind of cute as a goth :-)
• Leonard: "They're going to get beaten up at that club."
  Penny: "They're going to get beaten up at Walgreens."
• Holy crap! That's totally Mickey (Molly Morgan), Stephanie's friend from middle school on Full House! And, yes, I recognized her instantly.
• It's been quite the fall for guest appearances by Stephanie's friends--first Duckface was on Glee, now Mickey is on TBBT. Now we just need Marla Sokoloff, Andrew Keegan and the guy who played Harry Takayama (Nathan Nishiguchi) to show up somewhere, and we're set!
• Leonard: "You can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat."

  Sheldon: "Actually, it turns out I can."
• Lol at Sheldon using the spray bottle on Leonard.
• Mickey pressuring Howard to get a tattoo is reminding me of when Gia and Mickey tried to get Stephanie to smoke in the bathroom. Mickey never seems to be a good influence on anyone, does she? (To be fair, she did end eventually side with Stephanie over Gia on Full House. However, then Steph and Gia became BFFs and Mickey disappeared, so I don't know what the lesson is there.)

Oh, and speaking of TBBT, look at this! How adorable! That Sheldon doll looks exactly like Jim Parsons (to the extent that a crocheted doll can look like an actual person). Unfortunately, I don't think my crocheting skills are quite up to that level yet :-(

(Photo: CBS)

Glee: Chenoweth Schools the Kids

Glee:

"The Rhodes Not Taken"

This episode was fantastic. I didn't realize how much I like Kristin Chenoweth until she showed up on Glee playing April Rhodes, the most talented singer in the school's history who quit school a few credits before she graduated. Of course I adored Pushing Daisies, and she was fantastic in it (and very much deserved her Emmy award), but there were so many things I adored about Pushing Daisies that I'm not sure I was fully aware of how much I liked Chenoweth.

Chenoweth was great on Glee. She was hilarious, and she pulled off three absolutely show-stopping numbers. I'm thinking she's going to follow up her Emmy for Best Supporting Actress with one for Best Guest Star.

Highlights and observations:

• We're back to "Don't Stop Believing." Ooh, but with Quinn instead of Rachel. This version wasn't working as well, even before Quinn had to take a vomit break.
• Puck: "That Rachel chick makes me what to light myself on fire, but she can sing."
• This waiter is a six-year senior so he can stay in Vocal Adrenaline because he's the only one who can do the triple flip! Ha! I knew there was some funny business going on with that group.
• Sometimes my bangs do that weird flippy thing that Emma's bangs are doing right now, but I don't try it. And I try to stop it from happening.
• Eew, this newspaper kid is gross. Trying to blackmail Rachel into showing him her bra.
• Oh, Finn is crafty! Very good manipulative strategy.
• Emma: "...and two months later, Versace was dead."
• Wow, April's got a nice house! And she's an alcoholic. And she's a squatter.
• Chenoweth's looking good. Her hair looks very nice.
• Will: "We'll get you sobered up and find you some underwear. It's not too late for you."
• Sorry, kids, I'm pretty sure Chenoweth can kick Rachel's butt ;-) (And I love Rachel.)
• The juxtaposition of April and Rachel singing the same song is really cool.
• Lol at the glee kids' stunned reaction to April's performance.
• Will: "You draw a lot of attention to yourself and they're embarrassed enough as it is."
• Lol at April's efforts to win the kids over. Especially showing Mercedes and Tina how to steal groceries by holding them between their thighs.
• Finn: "You know what we should do?"
  Rachel: "Elope?"
• Ha! Kurt's looking rough.
• Kurt (to Emma): "Oh, Bambi, I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy."
• Emma says Kurt "looks like an 11-year-old milkmaid."
• Emma's a buzzkill, let April stay in glee!
• April: "These high school boys are a lot hotter than they used to be."
• Wow, April and Wow are show-stoppers. Their rendition of "Alone" is fantastic. Those lucky bingo players!
• Kurt: "Maybe Quinn is lactose intolerant!"
• Puck: "I bet you thought Burt and Ernie were just roommates."
• Wow, what a look of devastation on Rachel's face.
• Sue! She's been MIA in this episode.
• What is with these costumes?
• Ha at the country line dancing. They're good. But I'm thinking that Chenoweth could probably make pretty much anybody look good.
• Invitationals are very well attended.
• Will: "And, hey, there's always Branson."
• Kurt: "You were right, Mr. Schue. April would massacre Mariah in a diva-off."
• Kind of a lengthy intermission, huh?
• This April-less version of "Somebody To Love" ain't bad either. And Rachel sure picked up the choreography fast.
• Yea for Mercedes! I don't understand why she doesn't get more of the solos.
• Good episode! Lots of singing.

Song list: "Maybe This Time" (April and Rachel), "Alone" (April and Will), "Last Name" (April and New Directions), "Somebody to Love" (New Directions)

(photo: fox.com)