Gossip Girl: Toast Disasters

Gossip Girl:
"Enough About Eve"

So Chuck kissed a dude, and this episode was still kind of a snooze. It's like it's a new rule that at least two of Gossip Girl's plot lines per episode have to be almost painfully dull (Serena/Nate/poker and Vanessa/Dan/Olivia). I was even frustrated with Blair's shenanigans, because I had a hard time believing that everyone cared so much about who gave the speech at a freshman parents' dinner. I'm surprised that NYU could even get people to go to that dinner, let alone that it would spark epic battles over who got to speak at it. I don't know, I just think that if Blair's going to let her ambitions screw up her relationship with Chuck, she might as well be aiming a bit higher than giving the toast at a dinner for NYU parents. (Neither of Blair's parents even attended, which is a disappointment because I love Margaret Colin and John Shea, and Dorota wasn't even there.) Seriously, is anyone going to remember the stupid toast a week from now?

Also, have any of these students who "go to NYU" (or Nate who "goes to Columbia") ever actually gone to a class?

If the whole "Chuck kisses a boy" thing was a stunt to get ratings, it doesn't look like it worked.

One good thing about this episode was that Gina Torres a.k.a. Anna Espinosa of Alias turned up as Vanessa's mother. Unfortunately, the uncoolness of being in a Vanessa storyline tempered the awesomeness that is Anna Espinosa a bit. Here's a reminder of how great she can be. (The video's in German, but who cares: Anna tries to hit Sydney with the arm of a mannequin! Ha!)

Highlights and my observations:

• Chuck: "Bad dream? Don't tell me it was Charade again. I know how terrifying you find Walter Matthau."
• Aww, Chuck is so sweet holding Blair when she told him her dream was "All About Eve."
• Why wait to have Tripp run for Congress? Because he's only like 25 years old?
• Don't worry, Nate has an idea. Oh, I feel so much better now.
• There was a cover story on Vanessa on the cover of the NYU paper? Are you kidding me? Gag.
• Jenny (to Dan): "People like you more when they meet our family." THEY DO?!?! I'm sorry, but meeting Rufus would not make me like anyone better.
• Serena's dress does not really same day-appropriate. It looks like a party dress.
• I cannot believe people actually care who gives the toast at the freshmen dinner. I cannot believe people want to go to that.
• They were playing Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros' "Home" very quietly in the background during Vanessa's phone call. That song was easily the highlight of this whole episode. I'm a big fan of that song. They should have just canned all of this toast nonsense and these poker shenanigans and just played that whole song.
• Uh oh, Vanessa's lying. I thought she didn't lie.
• I didn't know poker could make for such boring television.
• Oh, nice work Serena and Nate. I told you that you should never feel too confident in one of Nate's plans.
• By far the coolest thing about Vanessa ever: her mother is Anna Espinosa (Gina Torres) from Alias. If Anna Espinosa is really supposed to be Vanessa's mother, Vanessa should be a whole a lot cooler.
• Oh, that Nate! Such a little sneak! There's no way Nate came up with this plan on his own. This was definitely Grandpa Vanderbilt's idea.
• Why is Olivia asking Vanessa why Dan doesn't want her to meet his parents, when Dan's standing 20 feet away from her right now!
• Ha ha! Dan just set the kitchen on fire.
• Ha ha, a kiss from Chuck Bass is #27 on the Tribeca Scavenger Hunt.
• Geez, Chuck's haircut is amazing. He looks super hot. I cannot get over it.
• Wow, this distinguished alumni isn't very upstanding. He had the "important job" of picking the speaker and he traded it away for a kiss from Chuck Bass? (Although, I can't say I really blame him...)
• This is quite a fancy freshmen dinner event.
• Why did Olivia change out of that pretty purple dress and into that way too tight orange thing? Ick.
• Chuck: "Keep up, Bambi."
• Wow, Serena can't even follow Nate's grandpa's scheme. It's not that complex, S. If she can keep up with all of Blair's schemes, she should be able to follow this one.
• Geez, Vanessa, piss off the few people left who can still tolerate you. Nice going.
• If Carter thinks Serena's going to give a flying crap about him in three years after he goes away to work on the oil rig, he's got another thing coming.
• Oof, that's rough. Vanessa just got a lecture on being a good person from Anna Espinosa! Ha!
• Rufus: "Dan, was that Blair on the P.A.? She really should have run that speech by someone."
• Damn, Chuck looks hot. It's distracting!
• Yeah, I don't believe that Blair's never going to manipulate Chuck again. Chuck should kick her ass to the curb.
• At least now we get to here some more of "Home"! It's helping to make all of Vanessa's screen time easier to stomach.

(photo: cwtv.com)