Premiere Watch '07: Desperate Housewives and Brothers and Sisters

Desperate Housewives:
Well, I guess this episode was better than most of last season, but I still wasn't really feeling it. I guess I've gotten sick of these ladies and their myriad of secrets. I mean, is it wrong that I wish Edie had actually offed herself? At least now she's back to being the villain and we aren't expected to sympathize with her. I still largely despise Gabby. Susan's antics feel tired to me now. And Lynette has cancer, which is not very entertaining for anybody.

I still like Bree though. And Andrew. Their conversation brought about my favorite line of the episode, when Bree argued that admitting her daughter was a teen mother would put them on the slippery slope toward becoming white trash:

Bree: "We might as well sit on the porch and play banjos!"

Orson and Bree's bit with the "trick BBQ fork" was funny too. It would have been funnier if it hadn't been in the promos.

There wasn't a whole lot that captured my attention or imagination in this episode. That may partially be due to the fact that while I was watching, I was working of my first task for the Dunder Mifflin Infinity online game (we Watch With Kristin message board people finally got ourselves a branch after weeks of hard work!).

The new lady and her mystery aren't doing much for me yet.

I think it's weird that Mike wants a kid, seeing as he already has a kid (Zach Young) that he doesn't seem to ever talk to.

Am I asking too much to request that we have to witness no further scenes of Susan at the gynecologist's office?

Premiere Rating: 5 / 10

Brothers and Sisters:

Hmm, well this episode was okay. A lot of it felt awfully familiar. The Walkers are still pretty entertaining though.

I didn't like the webcam narration scenes that opened and closed the episode. Snooze. And I don't like that they're trying to make us think that Justin was killed in the war. Clearly the B&S people are not going to kill off Justin--and if they were, they'd surely save it for Sweeps. Come on, this isn't the first time I've ever turned on a TV set...

I was happy, however, that the episode included one of those huge scenes where everyone in the family is drinking and yelling at each other and spilling each other's secrets. This one was a doozy, with everyone getting particularly belligerent while waiting for a table at a Mexican restaurant:

• Kevin: "He's going to dump me for Shiva or a lifeguard or something."
• I especially enjoyed Uncle Saul telling Kevin to just shut up.
• Nora: "So maybe if you all could move your drunken asses, my family and I can sit down and eat a damn burrito."

Premiere Rating: 6.5 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Grey's Anatomy

One day after Addison got off to a lackluster start with her Private Practice, we got a new episode of the flagship to enjoy. And, yes, I did actually enjoy this episode of Grey's, which is much more than I can say for last May's one hour crapathan of a Season 3 finale.

The Season 4 premiere got off to a great start with each of the previous interns (except poor George) trying their hand at giving their new interns the same speech that Bailey gave them on their first day. Their "Nazi" impersonations resulted in various degrees of success, with Izzie fairing the worst and Meredith losing credibility when she hilariously went off the script: "On call room. Sleep when you can where you can...but not with anyone...especially not attendings. Sleeping with attendings: not a good idea."

After a great start, the episode lost some steam. Callie was in over her head and I don't feel sorry for her; Lexi seemed a little too perky and excited to meet Meredith; Izzie was doctoring a deer for crying out loud and then lectured her interns saying that she "did the impossible" (please just get over yourself, Stevens); and Meredith still just can't handle a relationship with Derek for, oh, some combination of reasons. But, even considering those things, this episode was better than any of the Grey's we've seen since at least last November.

Highlights and random observations:

• I'm not loving Karev's new facial hair.
• Christina: "Why is everyone so tinkly and hurt? I'm the one who got left at the alter." Tinkly? Do they have to go to the bathroom?
• Bailey: "You and Grey aren't smelling each other in the elevator anymore."
• With the addition of all these new interns, doesn't it seem like there are a ton more people working in the hospital now than there were before? It just seemed like most of them were getting in the way.
• Lexi picked a bad time to introduce herself.
• Steamy: "You want to rub up against me, you're going to have to buy me a drink first."
• Callie needs to get her head in the game. Weird comment about George being a daddy since she's not pregnant...or "maybe" is. I found it all borderline creepy, but maybe that's because T.R. Knight was giving her a look of sheer terror the whole time she was talking.
• That's one fake looking deer.
• Hey, another pregnant chick who's all alone. Maybe Karev can have this one.
• The scene with all the interns conversing around the severed arm had a lovely, vintage GA feel to it.
• Meredith: "Spiritually, Bailey's over everybody's head."
• So the Chief's wife still won't talk to him? Come on! They reconciled! That was the one even half-way positive thing that came out of that train wreck finale and now that didn't even stick! Geez!
• Ha! George thought Izzy was talking about him when she referred to "Bambi."
• Thank you, Derek, for finally sticking up for Meredith. Too bad that you were the one complaining about her for all of last year.
• Well, that was a ridiculously easy childbirth, considering the mother was out cold having an arm reattached.
• So why did Lexi change her plans and do her internship at Seattle Grace if she really wanted to go somewhere else?
• McSteamy to McDreamy: "I didn't come to Seattle for Addison. I didn't come to Seattle to be chief. I came Seattle for you, okay? I came to get you back." Hilarious.
• I liked the Alex/Christina alliance at the end and also that George found a new friend in Lexi.
• And then George goes and tells Izzie that he loves her. Well, I guess I'm glad someone does, because that girl is on my last nerve. I would like to point out that George didn't have to watch her doctor the deer. Maybe if he had, he'd feel differently.

The dynamics of the show have changed with departure of Burke and Addison and the original interns now holding positions of power. It will be interesting how the characters and show deals with this shift. Now we just have to wait and see if this season will be full of good Grey's moments (the chat around the severed arm, McSteamy's proclamation to McDreamy) or if those painful Grey's moments (Izzie and the deer, anything from last year's finale) will continue to creep in.

Premiere Rating: 7 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Big Shots

Wow. This show is too awful for words.

I probably shouldn't dignify anything in this episode with a response, but why would Michael Vartan's wife have an affair with that old guy? Come on. She has eyes.

And, why, why, why when Dylan McDermott's character tells the story of how he propositioned a hooker at a rest stop, was arrested, and then realized said hooker was a man (transvestite hookers are apparently pretty popular this pilot season), did his three best friends laugh like that's the funniest story they've ever heard? Seems to me that's the time when your best friends need to speak up and say, "Well, that's what you freaking get for picking up a hooker at a rest stop you stupid, stupid idiot!"

And I stuck around just long enough to hear Peter Bjorn & John's "Young Folks" used in a pilot for the, what, 1000th time this season?

I couldn't last very long watching this crap, especially since Without A Trace was doing an episode about victims of the war and genocide in Darfur, which made the story lines of Big Shots seem all the more inane and worthless.

Premiere Rating: 2.5 / 10 (and I think I'm being generous here...Michael Vartan couldn't even dream of bringing in his allotted 5 points when he's struggling through material this horrible.)

Premiere Watch '07: The Office

I love The Office. I absolutely love it. And I'm glad to have it back. The Season 4 premiere started out with quite a bang! Meredith came out of nowhere! And the camera shot of her flying onto the windshield was fantastically done. Luckily, she turned out to be okay, although you wouldn't necessarily know that from hearing Michael's account, during which he was channeling the Arrested Development's hyper-literal doctor.

But, the night's big news: Jam is finally officially happening. Hallelujah! We've suspected for years that they're perfect for each other, and, wow, were we right! Could they be any cuter together? And the other question is: when are we going to start hating them for being so cute and perfect? I sure don't hate them yet. Give me more Jam!

New Pammy sure has become a force to be reckoned with. She guilted Angela into planning the hospital trip and forcefully told Michael that it is not okay to be naked in your office. Go Pammy! Why do I have the feeling that someday they'll all be working for her?

The closest thing to a complaint that I have is that I don't think that the hour-long episodes of The Office work quite as well as the 30 minute ones. It's hard for anything to be consistently hilarious for a whole hour. That said, I will gladly take every second of The Office that they are willing to give me.

Highlights:

• Kevin saying that Jim and Pam go together like peanut butter and jelly. Um, did he perhaps mean "peanut butter and JAM"?
• Michael: "Yeah, it's only Meredith. Thank God."
• Michael's whole conversation with Ryan, including his admission that he was being negligent and his misunderstanding of "double jeopardy."
• Michael: "I have flaws. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. I occasionally hit people with my car."
• Michael: "I'm not superstitious. I'm only a little stitious."
• Poor Sprinkles! I can't believe Dwight shut her in the freezer.
• Stanley, Oscar, and Creed starting the race and then taking a taxi to a bar.
• Michael's idea to carbo-load with fettuccine alfredo and not drink any water before the 5K.

Premiere Rating: 8 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Ugly Betty

Starting off the Betty review with some highlight bullets:

• The telenovela sequence in the beginning was funny.
• Justin looks much more than three weeks older.
• I like Yoga: "Everyone thinks I'm the maid. Or Gayle King."
• Hmm, I could have done without the oppressive Victoria Secret product placement that never seemed to end.
• Um, I think that Amanda would prefer not to be related to her parents. They're creepy :-)
• Eeeew, Amanda did sleep with Daniel! That totally didn't even occur to me when Mark first suggested that Bradford is her dad. Gross! I love that Amanda pointed out: "That's the kind of dirty that doesn't wash clean." Poor girl.
• Santos: "Man, the hooker had her baby kidnapped and now she has Tetanus? That's a bad Monday."
• "Dadford." Ha!
• Wilhelmina: "N. I don't have the energy to say 'no' anymore."
• Wilhelmina: "Is it just me, or does anyone else see the little fashion elf?"
• Wow, Willy's too smart. She didn't fall for Claire ploy for a second. Wilhelmina should hang out with Patty Hewes--the two of them would take over the world!
• Mark: "You? I may never be able to watch The Sound of Music again!"
• Oops. Alex(is) doesn't remember (s)he's a girl now. That's interesting.
• Aww, Santos is so hot; why does he have to be the one who is dead?
• Henry looks pretty good for having just taken the bus all the way from Arizona to NYC.

Good episode. Much better in my opinion than the overly dramatic Season 1 finale. I liked the Mark/Amanda stuff, and any time Wilhelmina and Justin get together is awesome. Also, Daniel seems to be making some solid progress, which is good.

But, wow, poor Santos. The scene where it is confirmed (I already had it figured out) that he's actually dead and Hilda's daydreaming was heartbreaking. Definitely the saddest moment I've seen on TV in a while. Poor Hilda. She and Santos finally got it together and now look what's happened.

What bothered me was that in the scene where Betty was comforting Hilda, she was seemingly equating Hilda's loss of Santos with her "loss" of Henry. Not the same, Betty. Hilda has a kid with Santos and was just about to marry him. You flirted with Henry occasionally at work. Santos was brutally killed in a robbery. Henry moved away with his pregnant girlfriend. Betty has reason to be sad, but her situation is no where near as tragic as Hilda's. Move on, babe.

Speaking of moving on, didn't it seem weird that Justin appeared to be totally over the death of his father after only three weeks? I know they weren't super close, but still. He was far more upset about the craft projects at his summer camp than he was about he dead father.

Premiere Rating: 7.5 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Private Practice

Well, based on what I had heard about this episode from critics, I was expecting this first actual episode of Private Practice to be pretty bad. And I guess it wasn't horrible, but it was pretty boring and kind of grating. That is not something it can afford to be when it's on at the same time as the very entertaining Gossip Girl. If there's any justice in the world, at least half of PP's (PP, ha!) viewership should switch over to GG next week.

I found the opening scene where Chief Richard questioned Addison's decision to quit Seattle Grace and move to the holistic hippie practice to be oddly fitting. His comment, "This is not my Addison," ended up being pretty prophetic. The L.A. Addison was not my Addison either. My Addison was a hardass hotshot surgeon who, except for making the big mistake of cheating on her husband, had her shit together. She was not silly. She did not dance around naked. And that was ok! I liked her just the way she was. Why does she have to change herself in order to have her own TV show? Oh, and most annoying of all, why did she have to use the phrase "Addisoning me," three times in this episode?! Just shut up.

My problem with the other characters on this show is that (like Addison does now) they seem very much like TV characters and nothing much at all like actual people. They're mostly either whiny or kind of buttheadish. It takes talent to make me not particularly like Tim Daly, and PP did it, so I guess congratulations are in order? Those pink scrubs he was wearing certainly weren't helping. Merrin Dungey, you may have dodged a bullet here.

Parts of the episode were just kind of boring, but some parts were flat out ridiculous. Such as:

When someone's boyfriend dies, who immediately demands his sperm? Like I realize that's what they were in the process of dealing with when he died, but come on: if you're boyfriend leaves to go get some milk from the convenience store and gets killed in a robbery, the first thing you say when police show up at your door is not going to be, "I want the milk!" And then the whole thing got even more stupid when the ex-wife showed up and said she wanted the guy's sperm too. Did he have some kind of fantastic DNA code that I was unaware of? It sure didn't seem like it, seeing as he keeled over and died in his middle age. It was especially ridiculous because why would his wife, whom he left because she got older, want to have his kid? There are other men out there for crying out loud. How about you have a baby with someone who is actually nice to you? This guy was clearly not that fantastic.

And another really stupid thing was that the teen girl just happened to come to the clinic to deliver her baby on the same day that Addison showed up. Because who was she expecting to deliver her baby? No one knew Addison was going to even be there! Were they planning on letting Piz the receptionist take care of it? AND this whole thing got dumber too when it was revealed in an "oh, by the way..." type of moment that the teen's mother died in childbirth. Shouldn't a girl whose mother died in childbirth be delivering her baby in an actual hospital?! It didn't occur to anyone there might be some sort of problem? GAH!

And how dumb is it that it takes so long for them to get people from their clinic to the hospital? You'd think that if you were going to have a stroke, a doctor's office would be one of the better places to do it, but apparently you'd be very wrong.

All that said, I do still like Piz. He managed to get a moderately funny line: "You think I'm eye-candy. You have no respect for me or my midwifery skills!" I was curious, though, about who was watching the front desk while he was helping Addison deliver the baby. But, seriously, Chris Lowell, if you could find your way to Gossip Girl or Reaper or Chuck or Dirty Sexy Money or Ugly Betty or almost anything other than this tired show, I'd appreciate it.

Premiere Rating: 5 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Dirty Sexy Money

My favorite description of Dirty Sexy Money was when someone called it the drama version of Arrested Development. AD left some pretty big shoes to fill, but it looks like the Darlings could become just as kooky, immoral and entertaining as our beloved Bluths.

The DSM pilot episode was quite fun. No surprise that I loved Juliet Darling since I'm a big Samaire Armstrong fan. As Juliet, she seems to have much less "sage wisdom" than she did as The OC's Anna, but she's totally nailing her new Paris Hilton-esque character. My other favorite Darling was the Rev. Brian, who is quite the firecracker despite being a man of God! Who says, "I'm sorry Grandpa's dead," to a little girl! Yeesh!

Bullets:

• Juliet: "I'd never want to be blind, but playing blind is really fun."
• The Darlings drink even more alcohol than the Gossip Girl kids!
• $10 million a year for the charitable foundation is a pretty freaking good offer, but by the end of the episode, it doesn't seem like nearly enough.
• Karen (to her fiance): "Nick deflowered me." Yikes!
• The personalized ringtones for each member of the Darlings were funny.
• Nick: "Look, he wrote his name in just now with a crayon!"
• Anything by the Teddybears and Peter Bjorn & John's "Young Folks" are definitely the official songs of pilot season. It's getting ridiculous.
• I guess it's official: money doesn't make you happy.
• I'm pretty sure that (the future senator) Patrick Darling's wife changed mid-episode. When they got out of the limo at the funeral in the beginning, she was definitely Tom's baby momma from Desperate Housewives (Kiersten Warren, also of Saved By the Bell: The College Years...ha ha), but a different lady was talking to Dan Rather at the party. Oops. Pilot recasting strikes again?
• Nick: "Don't you as a United States Senator have to have enough courage to walk into a hotel room and hand a trannie hooker a check!"
• Nick's dad had a 40 year affair with Mrs. Darling! Oh no! I guess we should have seen that coming, especially in light of her meltdown at the anniversary party.
• I know he wants to find the killer of his father, but I really think Nick might want to turn and run away from these people as fast as he can. By the time he solves the murder, his whole life is going to be ruined.
• Ha ha--Jeremy's going to space camp.

All in all, a good start. This show definitely has the potential to be an awful lot of fun.

Premiere Rating: 7/10

Gossip Girl: The Wild Brunch

Ok. I very much enjoyed Gossip Girl's premiere last week, but this week's episode was even better! I have absolutely found my substitute for The O.C.

Highlights:

• Is it wrong that every time I hear Kristen Bell say, "You know you love me," I grin like a fool?
• The scene where Serena got out of the taxi and Dan waved at her was hysterical! Dan getting his face hit by the door was priceless. He suddenly seemed very Seth Cohen-like in that moment. And I loved the next day recap conversation about "the wave" between Jenny and Dan. It reminded me in the best way possible of Seth and Ryan talking after Marissa told Ryan she loved him and Ryan said, "Thank you." Jenny's "It was a nice wave," was just like Seth's "At least you were polite." Bring on the awkwardness, Josh Schwartz! You do it so well!
• Dan and Jenny have the oddest apartment situation. There was a big metal door that you can pull up and down between their bedrooms. Seems like that might get a little annoying.
• Blair's friends have matching Prada turbans!
• There was a very Marissa/Julie Cooper dynamic going between Serena and her mom.
• I love the scenes with Dan and the front desk guy. They're hilarious. I hope there's a scene between the two of them in every episode.
• Mrs. van der Woodsen: "I'd like to get out of here before someone throws me down and tattoos me."
• Dan: "I live in Brooklyn--not the Ozarks. No offense to the Ozarks."
• And we have another crazy fancy party, and this one is complete with female models pretending to be statues. Wow. Loved that Dan tried to talk to one of them.
• Say what you want about Chuck, but he is one snazzy dresser.
• These people's parents are across the board awful. No wonder Blair, Chuck and Nate are insufferable.
• Blair (after Nate repeats the excuse that he and Serena were just going to talk about not talking): "That doesn't sound any smarter the second time."
• The climatic five-person group talk was great.
• Is it wrong that of all the secrets Blair revealed, I was most upset that she mentioned Dan's Cabbage Patch Doll? That is a low blow! What a bitch! :-) Poor Dan and poor Cedric. [Although I'm wondering how Dan came to have a Cabbage Patch Kid, since they were popular way before his childhood, which should have been in the mid-1990s.]
• Gotta love that there was another party and another fight.
• Gossip Girl: "Some might call this a fustercluck, but here on the Upper East Side, we call it Sunday afternoon."
• An awful lot has happened with these people in less than two days.
• Jenny bought hydrangeas! Someone definitely did not learn the lesson she should have learned from the Kiss On the Lips dance debacle. She's on a slippery slope.
• Serena was left alone in a very gritty looking NYC at the end.
• And it's only the 2nd episode and we've already got Rooney in the soundtrack. That's not surprising.

This is definitely the one new show so far that leaves me wanting to see more and more. Forget middle-aged doctors having emotional crises. Forget underachieving WalMart employees who suddenly find themselves saving the world. Forget people with special abilities. As far as I'm concerned, just bring on the rich white kids who throw fancy parties and tear each other to shreds! It might be shallow, but it's just so freaking entertaining.

Premiere Watch '07: Reaper

Ok, just as it was difficult to talk about Gossip Girl without mentioning The OC, it's kind of hard to discuss Reaper without at least thinking about Chuck. Because, wow, in a lot of ways, they're almost the same show. Funny, underachieving guy who works in a huge "box" store unwittingly becomes a secret agent (or, in the case of Reaper, a secret agent demon hunter). Based on the pilots, I think I liked Reaper just a little bit better...due in no small part to the fact that the main character is played by Bret Harrison..

In sticking with the 5 points per actor rule I pulled out of my butt established yesterday, I'd like to report that Bret Harrison totally delivered his 5 points for Reaper. I love Bret Harrison. He's the reason I still occasionally watch the Grounded for Life reruns on ABC Family. I love Brad and Lily (and especially their big dance at the prom). And, of course, finding out that Bret is in Adam Brody's band put him way over the top in my estimation. Like Michael Cera, Adam Brody has exceptional taste in friends. And, to prove that I'm a real Bret Harrison connoisseur, when I watched the repeat earlier this summer, I totally recognized that it was him playing the really weird, hip hop-ish VJ on the episode of The OC when Seth and Ryan go to Spring Break in Miami.

But why did I love Bret tonight? Well, he plays the lovable slacker very well. And he can do an impeccable freak out. And he has a very expressive face. And, in the scene where they vanquished the demon, and Sock said, "I think I wet my pants," Bret actually looked down to check. Eeeeeew, but so funny!

Other great things about Reaper include Ray Wise making the Devil seem like a pretty charming fellow and a very solid supporting cast. Sometimes Sock (that nickname is awesome) was a little over the top and trying super hard to channel his inner Seth Rogen (do we all have an inner Seth Rogen, and is that good or bad?), but he delivered a lot of the episode's funniest lines. And, let's face it, I like TV that's funny, so while the demon guy bursting into flames was pretty creepy and the Zamboni thing was gross, it's the comedy that will keep me coming back.

I'd also like to mention that the directing and camera work in this episode was fantastic. The scene where the shopping cart eluded Sam's reach was particularly cool. This episode was directed by Kevin Smith, and I admit that I haven't seen much of his work, except for a little bit of Jersey Girl, but we won't hold that against him. A lot of people made career choices during Bennifer 1.0 that they came to regret (um, namely Ben Affleck). Anyway, nice job, Kevin.

Highlights:

• Sam's mom: "Sam did go to college. He went for a month, and we're very proud of him for trying. It's just that college made him sleepy."
• Sock called Sam's brother "K-Fed" just because he didn't get into Stanford. Ouch!
• Sock throwing the bleach at Sam. "You were supposed to move that with your mind."
• the Devil explaining where the portals to hell are: "Anyplace that seems like hell on earth is hell on earth--like the DMV on Union Street."
• Devil: "Oh, I forgot, you got a 600 on the SATs."
• Ben: "I take it back, Sam; that's a really evil mini-vac!"
• Ha ha, asshat. Did we all learn our name-calling from Summer Roberts? It's nice to have a friend who will forgive you for anything just because you say, "I'm an asshat."
• Sock: "You're evil."
  Sam: "So I heard."
• I loved the scene where they got all suited up to go fight the demon and then had to sit and wait for the Dirt Devil to recharge.
• Sock: "You are Neo; you're the one!"
• DMV lady: "The boss give you the vessel he thinks you can handle... you must be a real moron."
• Sam: "My parents sold my soul to the devil! I mean how crazy is that?"
  Sock: "My dad forgot to pick me up from sleep-away camp for three days."
  Sam: "That's not the same thing."

My one problem with this episode was that you could totally tell that all the scenes with Missy Peregrym had been shot at a much later date than the rest of the episode. This is the problem we run into, CW, when we recast actors months later. The camera work in the new scenes seemed different, the lighting seemed different, and the real problem was that Bret looked different. He had longer hair, there were highlights in his hair, his face was scruffier, and he looked a little bigger. It was just silly.

Other than that, pretty awesome pilot. My fave so far.

Premiere Rating: 8.5 / 10

(photo source: cwtv.com)

Premiere Watch '07: Heroes

Hmm, I had a joke all prepared for tonight's episode of Heroes. I was going to say:

"Well, at least it was better than last year's finale...but, well, that's not saying much. Heck, today's episode of Days of Our Lives was better than last year's finale."

But, here we run into a problem: was tonight's episode better than last year's finale? And were either of them better than today's Days of Our Lives? Luckily for Heroes, today's DOOL was pretty darn bad.

Here are my two main complaints about Heroes (tonight, and in general, I suppose):

There is no dramatic structure to an episode of Heroes. It starts plotlines for 10 different people, then furthers them a little bit, then, instead of providing any sort of conclusion, it just starts plotlines for 5 other people and calls it a night. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

And it's sooooooo over-dramatic! Like, could Ando's facial expressions be any more over the top when Hiro's dad fell off the roof? Umm, yep, they could have been Peter's facial expressions when he found himself chained up in the Irish truck. Come the heck on, people! Tone it down a bit; you're not in a silent movie for crying out loud. And those Latino twins...oy vey. The scene of them talking while hiding in the doorway almost made me barf.

My praises for tonight's Heroes:

Well, they begin and end with David Anders. Wow, he's hot. Even when they make him wear that ridiculous Japanese feudal warrior outfit. It takes one hot boy to rock that outfit and not look completely ridiculous. I was extremely glad when Kensei and Hiro realized they both spoke English, because I was having a hard time keeping up with their rapid-fire Japanese while being horribly distracted by David's beauty. And I was also glad to have my favorite beautiful British rogue criminal back (well, kind of anyway). What I was not totally getting was why they decided to have Kensei turn into Jack Sparrow, but whatev. It could be worse, and it lead to by far the best moment of the night (and possibly the entire Heroes series) when:

David punched Hiro in the face!!!! Oh my gosh, I've been waiting so long for someone to punch Hiro in the face just to shut him up for a while. His constant cheerfulness has become so grating... Thank you, Kensei!

Other observations:

• Nathan's politician hair is ridiculous. Oops, I spoke too soon. His politician hair was no where near as bad as his new hairdo and beard! Yikes. He looks like the uni-bomber.
• Yeah, I wouldn't go hear Mohinder give a lecture either...
• Sorry, folks, Grunberg is still not badass. Elaborate NYPD training exercise they've got there, what with the immediate fake blood, etc. Umm, if all the "hostages" and "captors" were acting, wouldn't they both be thinking, "I'm acting"?
• Claire's grades are going to suffer if she can't raise her hand in class. Some teachers give a class participation grade. Not talking is going to make her stand out for being the weird blonde who never talks.
• Ando's hair is pretty awesome today.
• Great, a weird, recurring symbol. Because we so loved that on Alias and Kyle XY.
• Someone is taking out the older generation. That's fine by me. I can actually recommend some characters from the younger generations that I could do without too.
• Think there's any way that Mr. Bennet's career in the paper business can lead to a cross-over episode with Dunder Mifflin and The Office?
• Ha, the guy from "the company" who was on Dweebs (wow, that's a random reference) has the Midas touch! That's a fun power.
• He he. Grunberg's scared of a little girl. Like I said, he's so not badass.
• Oh, great, these Spanish-speaking kids mean more subtitles to read...fantastic.
• Where is the teacher supervision during Claire's gym class? And why didn't she put her hair in a pony tail to play badminton?
• There are 9 first generation people left. Ugh, this plotline is going to take forever.
• Maya's power is making people bleed out their eyes? That one sucks.
• Hunter from The Office a.k.a. "James Van Der Beek" a.k.a. West (seriously?) can fly. That's cool. I bet he could do a back tuck off that platform without hurting himself. My sister wonders if he's related to flying Nathan, and thus related to Claire. Wouldn't it be fantastic is Claire fell in love with another one of her relatives every season?
• Ok, it's official: no one in Hollywood can do an Irish accent without sounding ridiculous. At least no one on Heroes or Days of Our Lives anyway. I have no idea what just went on in that last scene but I was too distracted by trying to figure out why that one guy looked so familiar and by the accents (the one guy said "turd" instead of "third"....just saying).

Premiere Rating: 5.5* / 10

* 5 of those 5.5 points are for David Anders being ridiculously hot, which Heroes has nothing to do with. I'd give it a 10 just for David, but I don't think that's fair, so I'm setting the maximum number of points that any one actor can earn for a show at 5. Interestingly, if Kristen Bell had been in this episode, she could have earned it another 5 points and Heroes would have gotten a 10 despite being kind of a crappy hour of television.

Premiere Watch '07: Chuck

Well, Chuck was the second Josh Schwartz pilot to debut this fall (read my take on Gossip Girl here), and--not surprisingly--it was pretty darn good too. Chuck is certainly less likely of the two to garner comparisons to The OC, but, for the record, there were several fights, a party, and a trip to a Bait Shop-esque club.

Anyway, Chuck was delightful. Namely because of, well, Chuck. What's not to love about a character who is a little bit Seth Cohen, a little bit Jim Halpert, and a little bit Ed Stevens? That's a pretty unbeatable combination in my book (see? I still subconsciously quote The OC).

But, here again, Josh has created another "nerd" or "outsider" that is just too darn adorable to be a nerd or outsider (just like Dan from Gossip Girl). I was beside myself to understand why Chuck doesn't have women lined up around the block to go out with him--his date behavior was so cute. I suppose the secret to Chuck's isolation is that he never puts himself out in the world, as he still hasn't recovered from his college girlfriend dumping him for his roommate Bryce. (Speaking of the college girlfriend, can that please be who Rachel Bilson is going to play when she shows up for a multi-episode arc? That would be fantastic!)

Of course, the premise of the show is that Chuck accidentally absorbs all of the government's intelligence secrets into his head and unwittingly finds himself caught up in the dangerous world of spies and secret agents. The spy stuff turned out to be a lot of fun too. I loved how when Bryce was trying to escape, he did everything in the most complicated way possible (sliding under the table, going through the window above the door, etc.) ...because, seriously, how many times did Sydney Bristow make things harder on herself than she needed to? The ridiculousness continued when Sarah showed up dressed in black and was able to throw Chuck's computer in the air, beat everyone up, and still easily catch the computer. I guess the CIA has begun to recruit rhythmic gymnasts.

Another way Chuck spoofed previous spy shows was in having all the intelligence people speak in as many hard-boiled cliches as possible. This was really funny at first, but my concern is that the agents may have been a little too cliched. It looks like Sarah is well on her way to sprouting more of a personality (since we saw that Bryce was her boyfriend), and I hope that at least some of the other intel people become a bit more multifaceted.

Random question: do NSA agents really run around killing CIA agents willy-nilly? That seems kind of wrong. And is Sarah even allowed to be doing any of this spy stuff in the U.S. because my understanding was the the CIA can only operate outside of our borders? And why did Bryce clandestinely download his own government's secrets? Didn't the CIA already know that stuff? Ok, I realize that hardcore fans will tolerate some loose-ends when watching spy shows (see Rambaldi's "endgame"), but Chuck should maybe make more of an effort to not lose us all right off the bat.

Like The OC, much of the charm of Chuck is in the little witty comments, such as:

• Chuck: "Pedal safe!"
• Harry: "Do you know what 5 minutes is in Buy More dollars?"
  Chuck: "I didn't know we had our own currency."
• Chuck to the 'ninji' robbing his house: "Please, not the computer!"
• Chuck's coworker hypothesizing that the break in might be some sort of "ninji vendetta" and Chuck's response: "That's super. Thanks for thinking outside of the box on that one."
• Chuck asking the LargeMart employee to get "the guy at the front who's checking receipts" to come help. (I hate it when they do that at Circuit City!)
• CIA guy: "Nice guys aren't sent government secrets."
• NSA guy: "Don't puke on the C4."

And my other favorite parts and random observations:

• Was that the clip of Ryan carrying Marissa after her overdose in Tijuana in there amongst the other pictures encoded with government secrets? It sure looked like them. Does that mean that we were absorbing dangerous secrets while watching The OC? Because if it does, I'm in trouble.
• I loved that Chuck calls his sister's boyfriend "Captain Awesome."
• Is Agent Scardino (from Lois & Clark) Josh Schwartz's new best friend or something? First he showed up in The OC finale, and now he's the dad who didn't tape his daughter's ballet recital on Chuck. He's become the Greg Grunberg to Josh's J.J. Abrams!
• How smart was Chuck to use the porn site virus to crash the computer hooked up to the bomb! See, nerds make good CIA agents.
• The episode featured some good music: "Cobrastyle" by the Teddybears and then The Shins.

Premiere Rating: 8.0 / 10

(image from nbc.com)

2007 Fall Outlook

I'm going to have a lot of television on my plate this fall. Even though three of my favorite shows ever (The OC, Gilmore Girls, and Veronica Mars) were canceled last season, there are still about a million shows that I want to watch. Actually, I'm planning to check out 23 shows this fall. Even I think that's excessive.

Something's gotta give at some point though. Right? Thankfully, Damages is going to wrap up its first season in October, but if everything on this list is still going strong by the time Lost, Kyle XY, Monk, Greek, and Psych come back, I'm going to be screwed.

I'm most excited to see the pilots of all the new shows because we've been hearing about them for almost six months now! It's go time!

The following is a list of shows that I plan on watching (or at least monitoring). I also included a ranking (high, medium, or low) of how excited I am to have each (so far unpremiered) show back.

Sunday:
Desperate Housewives (low), Brothers and Sisters (low)

Monday:

Chuck (high), Heroes (medium -- escaping "low" only because of the addition of David Anders and Kristen Bell to the cast), Aliens in America (medium), Samantha Who? (medium)

Tuesday:

Beauty and the Geek, Reaper (high), Bones (medium), Damages

Wednesday:
Pushing Daisies (high), Private Practice (low), Dirty Sexy Money (high), Gossip Girl, Kid Nation

Thursday:

30 Rock (high), The Office (high), Ugly Betty (medium), Grey's Anatomy (low), Smallville (medium), Without a Trace (low)

Friday:

Moonlight (medium), Men In Trees (medium)

Yikes. And this list doesn't include Viva Laughlin, which I want to watch because it is supposed to be ridiculous and terrible, and Big Shots, which I will try (due to allegiance to Michael Vartan) to watch at least once even though it looks awful.

Hmm. I guess it's good that I really don't have anything else to do...

Premiere Watch '07: Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl:

Well, you can't watch Gossip Girl without thinking about The O.C. At least I can't. But, to be fair, I can't do much of anything without thinking about The O.C. sooner or later. That's how much I love The O.C. Which means that any show gunning to be a replacement for my Newpsies is going to have a tough sell with me.

That said, Gossip Girl made a pretty valiant effort. There were, of course, some things I didn't like about it. Nate, for one. My sister nailed it when she said he's "too pretty and too whiny." I don't give a crap that he's "trapped" in his relationship with Blair. As far as I can tell, he deserves no better.

Blair also didn't do much for me. I wasn't initially impressed with Serena, but she grew on me. I thought Chuck was funny in a Cliff/Dick Casablancas/Cappie kind of way at first, but, no, that kid's just creepy. Somebody needs to learn that "no" means no.

Another complaint is that, in the pilot episode at least, Gossip Girl is not as funny as The O.C. was. Although technically the pilot of The O.C. wasn't all that hilarious either, with the exception of Seth Cohen, who turned the world upside down. Which leads me to...

Dan (I like Penn, his real name, better) is clearly the Seth of this show. He's the outsider who is not included in the cool crowd. The problem here is that I can't figure out why. Seth was not cut from the same clothe as the popular water polo players; he was obviously completely different and didn't fit in. But other than the fact that he's apparently not as wealthy as everyone else, Dan seems pretty much in line with the rest of the GG bunch. He's not all that weird and he's freaking gorgeous! The pay off of Serena possibly falling for Dan is a little cheapened if he's so obviously hot, isn't it?

Not that I'm complaining too much about Penn's hotness. I don't complain when someone who looks like a blend of Andy Roddick and James Franco appears on my TV screen. Or next to me in the line at Target. Or in a passing car. Or in my living room. Or anywhere.

Now, not surprisingly, a lot of what I liked about Gossip Girl reminded me of what I liked about The O.C. There was a party and a fight after all. That's one Josh Schwartz formula that goes a long way toward creating awesome television.

Another Josh Schwartz theme that surfaced in this episode was the recurring "main character staring out of the window of a moving vehicle" motif. I've documented well how much I love the scenes of Ryan in the car coming to Newport and Ryan in the car leaving Newport which bookended The O.C. pilot episode (and reoccurred in the Season 1 finale). That motif work just as well in GG with Serena nervously arriving on the train and then contentedly riding home in the cab. Josh Schwartz, I love the way you put together a pilot.

And, finally, Kristen Bell is a master of the voice over. Nobody can do snarky better than KB. Gossip Girl signs off, "You know you love me," and, yes, I really, really do.

Other random thoughts:

• I can't believe Serena's last name is van der Woodsen. That's such a mouthful.
• I wonder what the deal with Dan and Jenny's mom is. And I totally saw it coming that Rufus and Serena's mom used to date. I guess they're the Kirsten and Jimmy of Gossip Girl. I'm a little confused about the logistics of it all though. If I understood correctly, she cheated on him with Trent Ressner from Nine Inch Nails, so that was early to mid '90s probably. And Rufus still had time to marry someone else and have a kid who's about 17 now? I'm confused.
• These kids do know how to rock a school uniform. Teen Vogue would be proud.
• I guess child celebrities aren't the only ones who can get served in bars despite being underage.
• Nate's dad is a classy guy, what with whoring out his son to score a lucrative business deal and all...
• It looks like all the moms on this show are various forms of Julie Cooper.
• I'd feel so much better about life in general if The CW didn't use that Pussy Cat Doll as their spokesperson. It just drags up old, upsetting memories.
• Sometimes in life, it helps to be a good text messager.

Best lines:
Dan: "Save some trees, have a blog."
Dan: "What? When Prince Charming found Cinderella's glass slipper no one accused him of having a foot fetish! ...No, she doesn't know me, nobody knows me! "
Dan: "You'd really go out with some guy you don't know? "
Serena: "Well, you can't be worse than the guys I do know."
Dan: "This is a date? Oh, well maybe I should have worn my loafers then."
I know I'm probably reading too much into this, but the pilot made me think that Gossip Girl could totally be Chuck. At the end, he threatenly told Serena, "I know everything!" which is exactly what Gossip Girl likes to say. Hmm...
My Premiere Score: 7.5 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Kid Nation

Kid Nation:
"I'm Trying to be a Leader Here"
Wow. This show turned out to be a lot more intense than I was expecting. I'm not sure that Kid Nation's critics are going to be pacified after watching the pilot episode; some of those poor kids were pretty distressed (especially poor little Jimmy). I was kind of surprised at the direness of the conditions of the ghost town. It was a pretty intense situation for kids (or anyone) to be put in. Luckily, they had that kid who needed a haircut (ok, I realize that doesn't narrow it down very much, but I don't remember his name) to give a good motivational speech whenever things were getting out of control. And of course having the chance to win a gold star worth $20,000 always helps raise morale too.


In addition to the shaggy-haired motivational speaker, I most enjoyed the little kids with Southern accents. They were super cute. My absolute favorite was Alex, the little Asian boy who is a dead-ringer for Stephanie Tanner's friend Harry from Full House.


It's kind of mean that the producers made up a whole backstory about Bonanza city that's totally not true at all. These poor kids totally believe it and I imagine they'll be a little let down to find out later that it was all a bunch of crap.

Speaking of the producers, I think they might have over-produced this show. I was interested in Kid Nation because I thought it would be a bunch of kids left alone to come up with whatever "society" they saw fit, Lord of the Flies-style. Instead, the producers imposed a town council, the division of the kids into four different teams, an employment hierarchy, team competitions, and a reward system. Frankly, I'd be more interested to see what the kids would come up with than what reality show executives think up.

My other complaint is that sometime these kids were a little full of themselves and listening to that just takes you back to when you were a kid and had to listen to other full-of-themselves kids. And that's kind of unpleasant. Luckily, by the end of the episode, most of the kids seemed to be devoted more to the greater good than to tooting their own horns. (And, speaking of kids who were awfully full of themselves, scroll up to see my review of the Gossip Girl pilot.)

One part of the episode that I found especially amusing was when the host told them they'd be able to run stores in the town and the kids freaked out. One girl's reaction: "Wohoo! Running stores! Wohoo!" Ha ha. Let's hope these kids keep their enthusiasm, because they could be the retail workers of America in a few years...

And I have to say that I'm pretty impressed with the kids' decision to take the seven outhouses instead of the TV. Even with my 22-year-old wisdom, I'd have a hard time turning down that TV set...

My Premiere Rating: 6.5 / 10

Best TV of Summer 2007

Well, quite honestly, I didn't do much of value this summer. I did, however, watch an awful lot of television, so I figure I might as well handicap it down to a nice little "Best Of" list. Here goes:

Best Reality Show:
So You Think You Can Dance -- For the second straight summer, I've been captivated by this show's great dancers with fun personalities who hip hop, mambo, waltz, quick step, krump, cha cha, swing, jazz, and contemporary (ok, I realize those last two aren't really verbs) their way into our hearts. My Season 3 highlights: Pasha, Sara, Pasha and Sara's West Coast Swing, Pasha and Lauren's Transformers hip hop, Neil and Sabra's table jazz dance, Danny and Lacey's mambo, Pasha and Lacey's mannequin hip hop, and of course the two guys swing dancing during the auditions.

Best New Show and Best Drama:
Damages -- Yea for FX giving us a show this intelligent and this exciting and this well-made in the summer! The great thing about this show is the characters keep getting smarter and more willing to do absolutely anything to get their way. The stakes have been ratcheted up so high that the audience feels like it's all about to hit the fan at any moment. Patty Hewes steals the show (she is being portrayed by Glenn Close, after all), but many of the other characters are amazingly fascinating--and amazing flawed--from Frobisher to Katie to Gregory to Tom to Fisk.

Funnest New Show:
Greek -- It's not the smartest show and it's probably not going to change the world, but Greek is pretty darn fun and there's nothing wrong with that. The characters are varied, interesting, and mostly likable (and many seem like people you'd actually find on any college campus). Greek is funnier than you'd expect and, on occasion, actually shows physics geeks discussing physics.

Best Show I Now Realize I Should Have Been Watching All Along:
Burn Notice -- After catching a few reruns last week, I now regret not being on the Burn Notice bandwagon all summer. The show has the "fun spy" feel of Alias and its well-utilized, often comedic voice-over smacks of Veronica Mars. Congrats to USA for finally finding Jeffrey Donovan a vehicle that showcases his talent and total hotness. And I love that this USA series is doing a season-long story arc (unlike Monk and Psych which have become terminally serial).

New Show That I Totally Respect Yet Have No Desire To Watch For Any Extended Period Of Time:

Mad Men -- Something about watching this show makes me feel yucky...which is exactly what they are going for. It's intricate, sneaky, and gorgeous. And the whole thing makes me feel fantastically uneasy, much like I imagine actually having to spend time in an ad agency in the 1950s would.

Best Character:
Cliff, Hidden Palms -- While Hidden Palms was nothing to write home about (and had possibly the worst main title sequence ever), the character of Cliff was a revelation. Michael Cassidy masterfully walked the line between devastatingly charming and possibly dangerous in a tour de force performance that transcended the series. It turned out that Cliff wasn't as nefarious as we originally were led to believe, but still, he had a knack for making bad look very appealing.

Funniest Lines of the Summer:

Cappie, Greek: "We may be puking, but the Omega Chis are not used to running on puke like we are."

Gus, Psych: "Some people are just born evil...like the kid from The Omen, the Children of the Corn, Chad Michael Murray."

Ellen, Damages: "Emily Dickinson. That bitch will say anything."

Pawn Shop Guy, Kyle XY: "Ok, easy, Veronica Mars!"

Best Unintentionally Funny Moment:

"I Don't Dance" baseball number, High School Musical 2. Ok, in my opinion, there wasn't much to redeem HSM2. Trite, sappy, rather poorly acted, etc., etc. But, I am more than willing to declare the "I Don't Dance" baseball song and dance number an instant classic. Because, I mean, what makes more sense than a boy adamantly claiming that he doesn't dance while dancing his way through a baseball game? Factor in some strong, if unintended, homoerotic overtones and this scene ranks as one of the funniest moments of the summer.

Stand-out episodes:
"Mr. Monk and His Biggest Fan" Monk -- In my favorite episode of Monk this season, Sarah Silverman (who I don't always enjoy) guest stars as Monk's obsessed fan and shows us her Monk-centric dioramas complete with a Troll doll serving as Natalie. And, yes, those are Monk's pants she's wearing...

(more to come)

My Boys: Who is it?!

My Boys:
Here we go with yet another summer season finale! Sheesh. September is starting to be as crazy as May. My Boys was renewed for a third season, so at least we know that P.J. and her boys will be back at some point. I don't know if anyone knows exactly when though--hopefully we won't have to wait until next summer.

There were two episodes on finale night: the first focused on P.J. trying to balance her boys and her new Hot Botanist (Evan/Michael Landes/Jimmy Olsen). Something about the-boyfriend-not-fitting-in-with-the-guy-friends storyline smacks familiar... and I think it's because My Boys does this same storyline all the time. Oh well, Andy bought a boat and never went anywhere with it :-)

Episode 1 Highlights:

• Aww, poor Hot Botanist/Evan/Michael Landes/Jimmy. He's so cute and I totally know how he feels when telling a story that suddenly doesn't seem anywhere near as interesting as everyone else's stories.
• The scene where the guys purposely get beaned in the batting cage was hilarious! Probably the funniest scene on My Boys ever. I was a little disappointed that P.J. didn't take a turn getting beaned, but I guess it's nice to know that she's too smart to try that.

The second episode focused on P.J. preparing for her Italy trip and rapidly going from having no date to having the possibility of three (or technically six, as Stephanie pointed out). Go P.J. for suddenly getting three potential boyfriends in one day! That is a freaking coup.

My question: isn't it kind of presumptuous to try to invite yourself along on somebody else's vacation like Thorn and the baseball player tried to do? I don't think I would ever assume that someone who had planned a vacation for months would suddenly just want me to come along. But, good for Thorn and baseball player guy being so flexible that they'd up and fly to Italy with some girl on a day's notice. That displays an impressive amount of spontaneity.

Episode 2 Highlights:

• Evan: "Italy? Oh, you don't want to go there. This time of year it's all mosquitoes and fat people and that annoying accent...oh, wait, that's Michigan. "
• Bobby splashing in the lake and getting algae foot or whatever.

And then came the cliffhanger we all saw coming about a mile away: P.J. picked a date, told him she had feelings for him, and he shows up on the plane at the last second...and, of course, all of this happens off-camera and we don't even get to see which guy it is. Not only is this kind of a lazy cliffhanger, but it's also annoying that this possibly huge event in P.J.'s life (declaring her feelings for someone) didn't make it onto the sitcom about her life.

But, ACK! Who was it? In my soul I hope it was Bobby. He's so cute and adorable and if, in this context, I am ranking him higher than both Michael Landes and Jeremy Sisto, you know how much I like him. What makes me sceptical is that there really hasn't been any building of the romantic tension between Bobby and P.J. in a long time. She kind of gazed at him happily in the museum, but all the other guys were doing that too.

Cliff hangers like this are annoying because I really care for like an hour, but by the time My Boys comes back in 2008 or whenever, I imagine that I will have totally forgotten all about it :-P

Greek: This is why I freaking hate legacies!

Greek:
Initially after watching the pilot, I wasn't that fond of Greek. Partially because I was busy watching reruns of Veronica Mars, and VM does school drama better than pretty much anyone else is ever going to. Partially because everything on Greek seemed at least slightly familiar. And partially because I think it took Greek a little time to hit it's stride. Thankfully, I gave Greek another chance a couple of weeks later and after a good reference to Sydney Bristow, a great reference to Days of Our Lives, and a fantastic reference to running on vomit, I was hooked. Although still occasionally inconsistent, Greek has proved to be a delightful summer soap. Rusty and Casey are protagonists you want to pull for and the supporting characters are vibrant and often hysterical.

Greek wrapped up the first half of its first season this week with a rather good episode. It certainly was eventful with a Casey/Evan breakup, a Rusty/Jen K. breakup, Calvin's outing, Casey getting appointed president of Zeta Beta Zeta, the college (finally) deciding to crack down on the Greeks, the Cappie/Rebecca hook-up, and a guest appearance by Charisma Carpenter.

My only complaint about the episode is that (like a lot of what happens on Greek), it was a little predictable. As soon as Casey said that she thought the the journalist mole was a ZBZ, I knew it was Jen K. Suddenly it became very obvious why she was nicer than the other girls, couldn't dance, liked nerdy Rusty, warned Casey about Rebecca and Evan, etc.

And my big nit-pick about the episode was that the campus newspaper printed Jen's article about the actions of unnamed sorority and fraternity members without even putting her name on it. I seriously doubt that any college newspaper would print a controversial expose written by "anonymous." That's so wildly journalistically unsound! It seems like Dale and Rusty's physics department is legit, so what happened to this place's journalism department? At least when the A.P. picked up the story, they attached a name to it. I'm glad somebody had some journalistic integrity, although I'm still unsure why the A.P. was at all interested in this article about some nameless frat boys and sorority girls.

Sweetest Line of the Night (someone has to fill the sweetness void in Kyle XY's absence):
Rusty: Forget you? I can barely remember anything before you.

Funny Highlights:
Dale: Cover up your privates! Lord's witness coming through!

Frannie: This is why I freaking hate legacies!

Ashley: Ok, first of all, no one says "spurned."

Rusty: I love you, Electron. I think I'm drunk. Where's my big electron? Electron? Electron?
(That whole scene was freaking hilarious.)

Closing thoughts: Casey is going to be toast in a war against Frannie--that chick is scary. Now that he's been outed, Calvin should join Rusty's frat; no one there cares about anything. The Cappie/Rebecca hook-up happened fast! I wonder if this is going to be a recurring thing or if it's done. Cappie looked pretty remorseful the next day.

It was interesting that the "first half season finale" ended with a very similar scenario to the way the show started: Rusty witnesses one of Casey's boys hooking up with Rebecca. This time, he decided not to tell her. Some things haven't changed much, but happily some have: Casey and Rusty are now much closer than they were when the semester began. I'm interested to see how the siblings will handle all the crap that will surely come at them next semester when Greek returns in 2008.

Congrats SYTYCD!

Congrats to famed So You Think You Can Dance choreographers Mia Michaels and Wade Robson for picking up Emmys! Mia's bench dance (Travis and Heidi) and Wade's zombies (group number) from Season 2 each earned Emmys (in a somewhat shocking three-way tie with a Tony Bennett special).

This has me totally psyched as I am forever devoted to SYTYCD Season 2 and these were definitely two of my favorite SYTYCD numbers ever. And since I'm still peeved the show wasn't nominated for the best reality competition show Emmy, it's nice that SYTYCD is getting at least some much-deserved recognition.

Sadly, this result that is sure to make me happier than anything that happens next week when the Emmy awards for the fancier categories are presented (Boston Legal, anyone?).

Train. Wreck.

MTV Video Music Awards 2007:
Oh sweet heavens, this is a disaster.

Britney, Britney, Britney. When, when, when are you going to get your act together? Against, I suppose, my better judgement, I really thought Brit's performance tonight was going to be hot. I figured that even if she's a mess, there have to be enough smart, creative people around her that she'll literally have no choice but to rip it up. But from the sparkly underwear costume to the unattractive weave to the extremely uninspired, half-assed dancing to the barely even attempted lip-synching to the look of sheer terror on her face, this was just an absolute train wreck.

It would have been great if she'd either actually sang or actually danced. And if she'd worn more clothing! Her days of the sexy "I'm a Slave for You" abs are gone. As are her days of being able to put on a decent performance. This is not the Britney of our youth, friends.

Wow. But it's not just Britney--this whole show is like watching one huge pile of mess. The structure is insane; they keep flashing randomly to the "parties" where bands/rappers are performing, but we never really see a whole song because they just cut away again. I guess I'm way too old for the VMAs now. It's like it's being produced by a third grader with ADHD who didn't take his meds this morning.

By far the best part was the two little boy backup dancers for Chris Brown. Those two were gold! Britney definitely would have been helped out by some really cute children dancing next to her. Other than the fact that he was clearly not singing, Chris was pretty good too. His performance as a puppet was head and shoulders more convincing than anything he did on The O.C.

I also just wanted to mention that it was super classy of Pete Wentz to mention InvisibleChildren.com in his acceptance speech for Fall Out Boy's Best Group win. It was also kind of sweet how misguided he was in thanking "the real music fans out there." Oh, Pete, let's be honest, the "real music fans" didn't even make it though Britney's number...

Poor Jennifer Garner. I feel bad that she had to attend this disaster. If I had a cutie daughter like Violet, I know I'd much rather spend my time taking her to the farmers' market than dealing with this crap.

Damages: We may not like it, but we know how to play second fiddle.

Damages:
I'm late with the comments again this week, so we're going to go with another as-it-happened list:

• So, how did Patty get her apartment cleaned up so quickly?
• Because Ellen asked the police if they identified the body, I guess she didn't know the person who was trying to kill her. So, thank goodness, that appears to alleviate my worst fear, which was that Jimmy Cooper was the one trying to take her out.
• Despite not having time for her fiance, Ellen does have time to stay on the cutting edge of fashion. It's nice to see she's got her priorities in order :-)
• Hmm, Ellen's being a bit of a firecracker with Gregory (Jennie Garth's husband). It's refreshing to see her not playing the doormat for the first time in a few weeks. Ahh, but it turns out she was just acting that way because Patty told her to. I wonder when Ellen will tire of being a puppet.
• Ted Dansen rocked his scene with his lawyer. "Get me a writer and stop being an asshole... she spat at me!" Ha.
• Could the slut (Lila) with the now-dead grandfather somehow be a plant by Patty? That would be incredible. I'm not sure what the angle for that would be though...
• Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! Ted's lawyer's dream about pulling his own tooth out was disgusting! I could have lived without seeing that.
• He he. George the writer is kind of funny.
• Hmm. Dr. Roberts (Patty's husband) is kind of a bore with his never-ending talk of wine. He was never the most riveting character on The O.C. either, but he wasn't this dull.
• Patty: "We may not like it, but we know how to play second fiddle. We're bread for it. Men can't handle it."
• Wow, Slutty Lila sure is gussied up for having someone over to look at medical equipment.
• He he. George's novel does sound like crap.
• Whoooooooooa. Ted is scaring the crap out of me in the scene where he shows up at George's apartment. Ted's going to be *at least* nominated for an Emmy next year. He is killing this episode. No wonder his lawyer is so freaked out he's dreaming about losing teeth...
• Patty: "I dumbed him as soon as I got my JD. He had no ambition. He disgusted me." He he. Nice, Patty, real nice...
• Oh Slutty Lila stole David's keys! And her grandpa's not dead! Ahahaha. Someone is clearly behind this; she's coming on way too strong and David's not that great.
• Maybe Gregory should avoid hanging out in bars and walking home late at night--good things do not happen to him when he does that. Oooh, the blonde was after him this whole time! That's interesting. And Patty is protecting him. I would not have expected that.
• And, when Slutty Lila shows up at Ellen's apartment and stares creepily in, we have the confirmation that I was right and that Slutty Lila is definitely in on it somehow. What remains to be seen is what exactly "it" is.

So, since Slutty Lila is so incredible sketchy, I think she just staged this "affair." It seems to me like somebody wanted Ellen to think David was cheating on her, but now I'm guessing he really wasn't. Perhaps he was just dumb enough to let the slutty granddaughter of a patient steal his apartment keys. A faked affair would present police with Ellen's motive to kill David, making it much easier for someone to frame her for his murder. (Especially with the incriminating voice mail message from Ellen, but that could have been left for anyone.) But who wants to frame her? And why kill David anyway?

The promo for next week's episode says that it will be the week that everything will start coming together, so here's to that. Whatever happens, I'm sure it's going to be crazy exciting!

Labor Day Round-Up: Greek and My Boys

Greek:
The ABC Family promo makers sure wanted us to think that a Cappie/Senator's Daughter hook-up was coming, but I think it's probably a good thing that didn't materialize. At least not yet. Their scenes together were cute though and I especially liked the background we got on Cappie. So, apparently, he is the result of somewhat irresponsible hippie parents. Things are beginning to make sense.

Best part by far of this episode though was the Rusty/Dale roommate war. Something about it just rang true to me and probably everyone else who has ever been involved in a passive-aggressive roommate battle. I loved it.

• Rusty's "Dale Tracker" was fantastic!
• I loved Dale's comment that his class on thermodynamics and heat transfer (or something like that) was a waste: "My little sister could teach that class!" He he.
• Rusty: "Dale canceled our cable after accidentally watching three minutes of the Dawson's Creek marathon."
• Passive aggressive roommate battles over milk. I've actually heard about one or two of those before :-)
• I would seriously not want to mess with Dale, but Rusty held his own. His bringing his most annoying friend (Beaver) over to hang out was especially well played.

Could I be beginning to love Clark Duke as much as I love Michael Cera? I love Michael an awful lot, so the bar is set rather high, but Clark grows in my estimation every week. And now that Ausiello is reporting that Clark is forming a band with Kristen Bell a.k.a. Veronica Mars? Well, it doesn't get much cooler than that.

My Boys:
I love anything with Michael Landes in it. He's adorable. My one problem is that his botanist character seems to enjoy using bug metaphors almost as much as P.J. likes using baseball metaphors. And if there is one thing this show does NOT need, it's more metaphors.

Wow, so next week P.J. has to pick her Italy date, and both Michael Landes and Jeremy Sisto are choices? That's fantastic. Sign me up for one of those "tough" decisions. Although, honestly, I'm still hoping she'll take Bobby. He's just so darn cute. (Oh, seriously, the best part of this episode was Bobby's suburb doppelganger! That was hilarious.)

Kyle XY: KyleCon 2007

Kyle XY:
Break out the celebratory Sour Patch Kids...it's time for the summer season finale! Wohoo! Here's my comprehensive coverage of the episode:

• You can tell it's summer season finale time when it takes about 5 minutes of "Previously on Kyle XY" clips to get us ready for the episode.


• Emily: so has she finally officially come over to the good side or was her letting Foss go really just a trick to get him to lead Madacorp to Kyle and Jessi? I'm on the fence on this one, but I think maybe she's a good guy now.


• Wow, if you put light behind Adam's ring, it projects a rather detailed map onto the wall. Dude, that guy had a lot of time on his hands...


• The ring-map leads Kyle and Jessi to a diner where the owner confuses them for Adam and the girl in the picture, who apparently used to hang out there and play "She Could Be You" on the jukebox. Was it just me, or did the diner owner seem a little young to have so totally succumbed to dementia?


• Kyle calls Declan who realizes that Foss must be outside listening in on the conversation, which is a very smart observation for Declan. Immediately thereafter, however, Declan does the thing where he lies to Lori to protect Kyle, which is so August 2006...


• Kyle finds an engraving on the table made by Adam and the mystery girl that indicates that A loves S. So now we know that mystery girl's name starts with an S. Guesses? Sara, Sydney, Scarlett, Sofia.... hmm, yep, Sofia sounds about right.


• Next Kyle and Jessi find a mysterious cabin out in the middle of nowhere. No one appears to be around, but they do find a secret room in the basement with a door that requires them to enter a song password to get in. Kyle calls Amanda to ask if she can find the tune to "She Could Be You" for him and she's offended to find out that he's with Jessi, saying, "You're calling me for help and you're out somewhere with her? That's completely inappropriate!" Ha ha. Is it? He wants her to look up a song--what does she think he's doing? I mean, if he, say, made out with Jessi, took a picture, and sent it to Amanda with his camera phone, that would be completely inappropriate. I don't know if asking her to look up a song melody falls into the same category. Anyhow, the scene where she plays him the song and he listens to it and misses her was a lovely moment for the most chaste teenage couple on ABC Family.


• Kyle opens the door, and, lo and behold, there is Adam. I had a feeling that Adam wouldn't be that easy to get rid of, seeing how smart he was. Adam's in a coma, and luckily, Kyle developed the (odd and, at the time, seemingly irrelevant) power to communicate with people in comas just a few weeks ago!


• Where was all the smoke in the secret room coming from? It was out of control.


• Jessi manages to hack into Kyle's mind while he's trying to communicate with Adam, so she now has the info Madacorp wanted her to get. She flips her lid and runs away and a bizarre slow-motion anti-fight ensues between her and Kyle. Kyle literally flying over her to get between her and the cliff was actually crazy cool! Nice use of special effects, ABC Studios.


• Jessi jumps off the cliff and somehow disappears into the dam/river below. I'm thinking the fall didn't kill her, bionic mess that she is.

My favorite part of this episode was that the Tragers finally wised up and decided to stop ignoring the fact that almost every week Kyle does something impossible. But they have some problems figuring out what's going on, because, let's face it, without the help of Kyle they're not the smartest family in the world. I loved how Nicole and Steven resorted to looking through Josh's "Kyle File." It was nice that Josh, who's the one who always wants Kyle to be wild and weird and freaky, was the one who stood up for him, reminding everyone that--no matter what's going on--Kyle is part of their family. That was a lovely stand for Josh to take. And, seriously, that kid is not nearly as annoying as he used to be.

This plot line also brought about the funniest lines of the night (both from Josh):

"This is like a Kyle convention. Kyle 101. A symposium on all things Kyle. KyleCon!"

and,

"He sleeps in a tub! Let's start with that."

So now we face the long wait until "early 2008" when we find out what's next for Kyle and friends. Perhaps Jessi will assume the role of a legitimate villain. It would be interesting for the two 'subjects' to end up using their powers on opposite sides of this battle. I'm also hoping that Amanda comes back from her semester at music school with purple hair, an all-black wardrobe, and an artsy (and preferably foreign) boyfriend. I like her and Kyle together, but an edgier Amanda would be hilarious.

Well, I'm going to miss Kyle and his adorable face. I suppose there will be plenty of new television to keep me occupied until 2008 when Kyle returns, but I look forward to having him back.