Chuck: A Buy More Christmas

Chuck: "Chuck Versus the Santa Claus"

Just the highlights:

• The Buy More-ians commenting (and betting) on the outcome of a car chase reminds me of first season Alias.
• These elf outfits the poor Buy More employees have to wear are awful. Poor Morgan in the yellow tights!
• Ellie: "So my present to my fiance is a ticket to death?"
• Chuck: "This store has a very strict no-bravery policy."
• General: "It's an electronics store, not Basra. Get it under control, Major!"
• Carl Winslow from Family Matters!!!
• That is a terrible picture of Ned.
• Ellie: "A lot of people get by with 9 toes."
  Jeff: "I'm getting by fine with 8!"
• Jeff: "Yes, I'd like to speak to Prisoner 20158 a.k.a. Mom."
• Why doesn't Ellie have the bracelet that her dad gave her mom when she gave birth to Ellie? Maybe she doesn't want it because she doesn't like the dad?
• Ned: "You've been a really good friend to me, Chuck, so I'm going to let your girlfriend go."
  Chuck: "NO!"
  Jeff: "Ouch!"
  Lester: "It's going to be a cold Christmas at the Bartowski house!"
  Buy More girl: "Oh no he didn't!"
• I knew this hostage negotiator was going to be in the Intersect. Saw that one coming for miles.
• Oh no, Fulcrum is all over this situation. Ugh.
• Oh no, now Fulcrum finally knows that the Intersect is in Chuck's head!
• Ned doesn't find anything suspicious about all the boys huddling up and putting their hands in the middle and saying "break!"
• Oh poor Lester! He took quite the kick!
• I knew Morgan would save the day. He usually does, despite is reputation for being a do-nothing.
• Where's Casey? Why was Sarah in the tree lot alone with the Fulcrum guy? Casey went in there with her. Is he easily distracted by a good Fraser fir?
• I guess Sarah doesn't have much confidence in the CIA being able to keep Fulcrum from breaking an agent out of their detention facility, huh? If the situation is that bad, maybe they should just beef up their security.
• The reunion between Big Mike and Carl Winslow was adorable.
• Oh, poor Morgan.
• Doesn't Sarah notice the look of sheer terror that Chuck keeps giving her? She's not a very perceptive spy...
• Whoa, this episode was actually kind of heavy.
  

The bad news: no new Chuck until February 22nd?!?! That's kind of harsh, especially since Chuck has been flat-out tearing it up this season.

Privileged: Hidden Palms Reunion! (Seriously?)

Privileged: "About the Ripple Effect"

Raiding the cast of Hidden Palms, are we, Privileged? Does that seem like the best idea to anyone? Anyone? I'm all for employing Michael Cassidy, but I would have quit there. Now we've got Cliff's mom playing Megan's mom. And then there's the dude who was the AA sponsor guy on Hidden Palms hanging out in Lily's hair salon! Enough. If Johnny (Oliver from The O.C.) shows up, I'm turning this off.

Observations:

• Lily got married!? Holy heck.
• Sage: "Oh, you are an assortment of nuts."
• Rami: "I don't think he's that cute." (Me either.)
• Since it seems like all the existing magazines are folding or laying off workers, it's probably not the best time for Will's dad to be trying to start a new magazine (esp. one that sounds boring and like something Betty Suarez would come up with).
• Hey, look, it's Little Franco! (His name is Dave.) I can tell he's a Franco: he's a cutie and has an array of James-like mannerisms.
• Little Franco (about Titanic): "I loved that movie!"
  Sage: "You probably don't want to tell that to everyone."
• Is there a way that we could write Megan out of this show? Because she's driving me flippin nuts.
• Mandy and her no-crap attitude are kind of fun. She refuses to put up with anyone's B.S.
• Little Franco plays the French horn!
• Little Franco: "Hey, you know how when you play it, you stick your hand in the open end? Well, I used to hide Starburst in there..."
• Aww, Rose, forget about the cook guy; don't make Little Franco sad!
• Dude, Megan don't touch the restaurant's mints! Don't you remember the story Rory Gilmore told about the article she read about people touching the mints after they had gone to the bathroom but not washed their hands?! Urine mints, Megan! Eew!
• Charlie: "I'm not your problem, buddy! ...You do have a problem, and it's you."
• Yes, Charlie is so much better when he's not being whiny and pathetic.
• I gotta agree with Megan's mom's opinion about the philanthropist magazine being a snooze.

(photo: cwtv.com)

Gossip Girl: A Wedding and a Funeral

Gossip Girl:
"O Brother, Where Bart Thou?"

Today my sister saw this in the Wall Street Journal:

"Stayin' alive. Buried in the tax law is a powerful incentive for many wealthy people who care about their heirs to stay alive at least until the dawn of 2009. The basic federal estate-tax exclusion, now $2 million, is scheduled to soar to $3.5 million next year. Thus, if someone survives until Jan. 1, an additional $1.5 million of that person's estate will be sheltered from the federal estate tax, where the top rate is 45% both this year and next."

So, do we think that the real reason Chuck Bass is so upset is that he would have gotten an extra $1.5 million tax free if Bart had just held off on succumbing to the fatal automobile accident for one more little month? Or is it because his unclassy skank of a step-mother marries people she doesn't love for money? A mixture of the two, perhaps?

I now hate both Rufus and Lily more than I hate Vanessa. Vanessa! Rufus is just smug and self-righteous and whiny. Lily is a terrible person. What the hell was she even thinking blaming CHUCK for Bart's accident (in the scene in Bart's office)?!? (She said that Bart wouldn't have been driving to the party if Chuck hadn't called him.) WHAT IN THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HER? Why would you say that to a grieving teenager? And then she freaking slapped him!!! Like I said last week, slapping a kid during his father's funeral just is not okay. Evil, crazy woman.

Poor, poor Chuck. The boy is not handling this well (as we would expect). Yea for Blair for doing her best to stand by him. And hurray for one of those two finally having the balls to say "I love you." How much better is it that she said it in a situation like this instead of as a ploy to get him in bed? Unfortunately, grieving Chuck is a hard nut to crack, and he could only accept her comfort for a short period of time. (Don't fall asleep when you're on Chuck-watch, Waldorf.)

Highlights and observations:

• Wow, so Bart's already dead, huh? No long, drawn out coma storyline or anything?
• Eric: "We know that's gin in your coffee cup."
• Lily: "We're doing comfort food! Nobody's comforted by a tuna tower!"
• Eleanor!
• Cyrus: "Because, my dear, in the midst of death, we are in life!"
  Eleanor: "Genius."
• Oh, so Dan's been a rock for Serena these last few days, huh? Speaking of rocks, Serena's wearing a whole mineral collection around her neck! At least she's not displaying her typical amount of cleavage to go to her step-father's funeral.
• Oh, Rufus is waiting for Lily this time, huh? So he's not going to start bedding random 23-year-olds a week from now?
• Oh, my freaking gosh, Chuck killed me in the first scene with the PI in the bar. He looks devastated.
• Do Dan and Aaron need to stand together? Awkward.
• Eric looks tiny compared to towering Jenny in her heels. At least Jenny's gothic, all-black wardrobe is finally appropriate.
• Blair: "Am I going to have to stick my finger down your throat? Nate will hold back your hair."
• Wow, Chuck is crazy mad at Dan! It's too bad Rufus didn't show up--I'd like to see him feel some of Chuck's wrath too.
• Is Jenny going to get kicked out too? I'd love to see Chuck turn on her now.
• Here's my proof the Ed Westwick would kill as a vampire. (He's even got the dark circles under his eyes.) No one should ever doubt my casting decisions again.
• Oh geez. Now we have to listen to whiny Rufus' stupid song?
• Blair: "I'm not maternal. I've just been spending too much time with Cyrus, and I'm turning Jewish."
• Eleanor really wants to get married in an outfit Jenny made? She must not have seen the dress Jenny made for Penelope to were the the Snowflake Ball...
• Geez, just go away, Aaron! Even Serena wants you to leave now.
• Ok, was Jonathan always this much of a dork? Is there a point to him coming back? I mean, it's nice that Eric has someone who cares about him, but I don't really care...
• Why did Blair and Nate leave Chuck alone upstairs?
• No, Nate, Blair should not just let Chuck go; he's a freaking wreck. Nice to know that Nate's still worthless in a crisis. Jenny dodged a bullet here.
  
• Blair: "But I am me and you're you. We're Chuck and Blair. Blair and Chuck. The worst thing you've ever done, the darkest thought you've ever had--I will stand by you through anything."
  Chuck: "And why would you do that?"
  Blair: "Because I love you."
• Aww, poor Blair; she started to cry when Cyrus told her he loves her.
• Blair: "Only a masochist could love such a narcissist."
• No, Lily, there are no subtle nuances to what you did (loving Rufus and marrying Bart anyway). You just suck.
• Nice use of an accent by Dan when he said "going off to Buenos Aires with Aaron."
• Jenny: "You still have feelings for her, right? Okay, do you think you can put them into words and speak to her out loud?"
• Geez, I hope Chuck takes every cent of Bart's money away from Lily. She is so beyond unclassy. Going away with Rufus the day after her husband's funeral? I think even Julie Cooper waited a little longer than that after Caleb's funeral to hook back up with Jimmy.
  
• Hmm, so Lily's mom wants the truth out there? Interesting. Because she knows it will break up Rufus and Lily?
• Dan: "I carried the garment bag."
• Blair's dress for the wedding is gorgeous. Probably because Jenny didn't make that one.
  
• Wow, Dorota looks fantastic! It looks like she got to wear one of Blair's headbands.
• I hope Dan beats smug Rufus and his turtleneck the hell up.
• Don't burn it, Chuck! You don't have to go public with whatever info is in the document, but I'd keep it around just in case.
• Awww, the scene with Blair holding Chuck was the sweetest thing I've ever seen.
• Biggest. Eye roll. Ever. I was hoping so much that Lily's big secret wouldn't be that she had Rufus' love child. Who couldn't see that coming from about 300 miles away? And, frankly, if you're Gossip Girl, it's embarrassing that the new 90210 beat you to this storyline.
• Oh no, the previews indicate that Chuck's going to continue to spiral out of control. I just hope the poor kid doesn't fall of the roof. There's no reason for him to go all Cassidy Casablancas on us.
  

Headband Monday: I wore the blue one with criss-crossed ribbons. Probably should have gone with black though since it's the color of mourning and poor Chuck is in pain.

(photo: cwtv.com)

Gossip Girl: Nastia and a sequined Chuck

Gossip Girl:
"It's a Wonderful Lie"

Two weeks between new episodes of Gossip Girl is rough. It was such a relief to have it back.

The big news of the episode for those of us for whom watching gymnastics is a way of life was that Nastia Liukin made a cameo. The big news for those of us for whom watching Gossip Girl is a way of life was that this episode was pretty fantastic.

Nastia's cameo: For a second there, it looked like she was about to land herself a Bass, but then Blair showed up to abruptly shove her aside. Only Blair Waldorf would have no qualms about pushing away a five-time Olympic medalist... As far as cameos go, at least Nastia's was decidedly less creepy than poor Shawn Johnson's appearance on The Secret Life of an American Teenager. And at least no one did cartwheels down the hallway after Nastia left.

Fantasticness: The Chuck and Blair scenes were awesome as usual. The Chuck, Blair, and Dorota scenes were crazy amazing. And I think I even enjoyed the Nate/Vanessa/Jenny/Mean Girls story line too.

Favorite quotes and observations:

• Chuck: "Who's in the lead to play the Man With No Future?"
• Serena: "Dan Humphrey, the scourge of high society, is going to the ball!"
• Jenny: "Otherwise I'll start thinking about my future, and then there'll be a Jenny Humphrey-sized hole through my wall."
• Vanessa's such a dirty liar.
• No way can Jenny make a whole dress in one day. She must be the fastest little sewer in the history of the land.
• Lexi: "You know, I feel inspired to shop at the Gap!"
• Eew, Nate and Vanessa are kissing now? Um, Nate really does get around at a pretty fast clip.
• Ha ha ha, Gossip Girl captioned the picture of Nate and Vanessa kissing with "Ew ew ew!" That's what I said!
• Bart really is going to die soon--he's making nice with everyone!
• Serena, I can see your boobs again.
• Not loving this dress Jenny's making at this point.
• Jenny (to Vanessa): "Are you really that desperate?" Yeppers, Jenny, she is. Are you really that surprised?
• Chuck is playing the piano!!!
• Blair: "If you like your date, I get your limo for a month."
  Chuck: "And if you like yours, I get Dorota!"
• Chuck (to Dorota): "I take my breakfast in bed."
• OMG, how amazing would a spin-off sitcom with Chuck and Dorota be?
• Geez, Lexi is annoying. She's even more annoying than Vanessa.
• Serena: "Can't she just vote?"
• Ahh, good, Bart's back to being an ass. Now we won't feel so bad when he bites the dust.
• No, Blair, no. Aaron is NOT hot. Not hot, Blair!!! And what happened to Blair's "wait until you're in love" philosophy that she was spouting just a few weeks ago?
• Blair: "Don't you know that Chuck doesn't like his fruit pre-picked!!!"
• Blair and Dorota picking Chuck a date was hysterical. Poor Dorota joined Facebook groups.
• Blair's party dress is fabulous.
• Eew, whose friends like having conversations with other people about their friends' sex lives? ("Aaron told me that tonight's the night with Serena...") Gross! Way too much information. (BTW, if the dude runs to tell his ex-girlfriend that his current girlfriend said she wants to sleep with him tonight, isn't that weird on several levels?)
• I feel like Lily should be getting a big "I told you so" regarding marrying Bart right now.
• Wow, soooooo much of Serena's boobs are on display, I don't think that anyone's even going to notice Vanessa's see-through dress.
• Serena seriously needs to learn to not dress like such a skank. It's become an embarrassment.
• I'm glad Little J still dresses like the Wicked Witch of the West occasionally.
• Vanessa likes Nate better than she liked Dan? Really? Him?
• OK, you can just see the outline of Vanessa's legs. It's not that bad. It would be one thing if she were wearing underpants with dolphins on them or something, but she's not. This is no where near the Nair-tini incident.
• Wow, when did Nate get so preachy? I'm sorry, in this scenario, Vanessa looks much worse than Jenny. I mean, the see-through dress was not that bad. And why's Nate so shocked--Jenny pulls crap like this all the time!
• Blair: "But she's me. Only less--I gave her that headband!"
• Ok, we're at least finally getting some kind of explanation of why Rufus let Lily go on her wedding day. Which is nice, because it made zero sense at the time. The explanation doesn't seem to make a ton of sense either though.
• Luckily for Vanessa, Nate is really fickle.
• I think Blair's wearing the necklace Chuck gave her for her birthday last year. I love that necklace. I hope Erikson Beamon's Target line includes something similar.
• How can you say no when a boy in a sequined tuxedo jacket asks you to dance?
• Oh no, is Chuck going to blame himself for Bart's accident since he told him to come to the party?
• "Bart's been in an accident." Well, that's the worst kept secret of the year.
• Next week's promo: Wow, grieving Chuck really does look like a sexy vampire. And what the hell is wrong with Lily? You don't slap your step-son right after his father just died, no matter what he says to you. Have some compassion, van der Woodsen.

(Is it just me or in the above photo of Chuck and Blair, do they not look like they're auditioning for roles in the sequel to The Other Boleyn Girl or some other Renaissance courtesan romance?)

Headband Monday: white band with the bow.

(photos: cwtv.com)