Premiere Watch '09: The Office

The Office: "Gossip"

Can you believe that The Office is now in its sixth season?! This show has proven to have some impressive staying-power, especially considering most of the action takes place in the same florescent light-lit office suite. It just goes to show you how much mileage a show can get out of a lot of really well-crafted, entertaining characters.

The Office started off Season 6 with a solidly funny premiere episode--it was not the funniest episode ever, but it definitely packed in a lot of laughs.

Highlights:

• Jim: "So, technically, they are doing Parkour, as long as Point A is delusion and Point B is the hospital."
• Andy: "Back flip, gainer into the trash."
• Oscar, Meredith, and Kelly debating whether the interns are dating during their lunch break.
• Dwight: "Stanley is way past the middle of his life, especially considering his height-to-weight ratio."
• Oh nooooooooooooooooo! Stanley IS having an affair!
• Michael: "Do people often say they're going on sales calls and then go some place else? Because that's not cool."
• According to Michael, Angela's fake, rich, older boyfriend owns a Quiznos on the Turnpike.
• Andy: "Who told you that? ...Did you run into someone from my high school?"
• Oscar: "If you resisted Brad Pitt a little bit, he would still need to get to you?!"
• Oscar: "What exactly is my responsibility here? To comfort insecure, heterosexual men? That cannot fall to me."
• Dwight: "...and one of you will make a great mother."
• Pam: "Why would that come into your brain?"
• Creed: "If I can't scuba, then what has this all been about?!"
• No matter what you may have heard, Oscar is not the voice of the Taco Bell dog.
• Dwight: "You told people that I use store bought manure when I've showed you where I get my manure."
• Lol, they thought that Jim was a J. Crew model. He actually does look like one.
• Michael: "Hey, what up, Cynthia?"

All in all, The Office's season is off to a good start. I liked that the episode allowed most all of the characters to have some good lines and to be their zany selves (Creed talking about scuba was my favorite). I would have liked to see some more of Ryan, however.

Premiere Rating: 7.5/10

Gossip Girl: Lily of the Valley & Prom Queen B

Gossip Girl:

"Valley Girls"

A couple days before the well-hyped Lily (Rhodes) van der Woodsen (Bass) flashback backdoor pilot aired, rumors swirled that The CW isn't planning on putting the Lily spin-off on its fall schedule after all, and will instead opt to pick up Beautiful Life (featuring The O.C.'s Mischa Barton), the Melrose Place update (because why come up with a new idea when you can remake an old one?) and Vampire Diaries (to capitalize on the Twilight hysteria) and to renew Privileged (which, ironically, is one the only shows I've ever watched that I've actually called on the network to cancel). After watching Lily's flashback take over this episode of Gossip Girl, I can say that--if the rumors are true--not picking up the Lily spin-off is one of the few programming decisions The CW has made that I agree with.

I once wondered if Josh Schwartz could ever create a show that I wouldn't like, and now we have our answer. The Lily '80s flashback was just painful. It lacked the wit and charisma that a Josh Schwartz show typically thrives on. The characters (even the ones we already knew) were underdeveloped and stereotypical. The dialogue was unnatural and sometimes just bizarre. The whole thing was boring. And Lily was possibly even more annoying as a teenager than she is now (and that is a major feat).

Oh, and you know the flashback was bad if I'm trashing it even though it included several cast members whom I already love or at least like: Ryan Hansen (my beloved Dick Casablancas from Veronica Mars), Krysten Ritter (a veteran of Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars, who is currently so much better in Breaking Bad), Andrew McCarthy (who will always be Larry from Weekend at Bernie's to me), and Cynthia Watros from Lost.

But the worst part of the whole Lily flashback was that it stole precious screen time from the Gossip Girl characters that we love! (Except for Vanessa--Lily can have all of Vanessa's screentime as far as I'm concerned.) Even though the Gossip Girlers were just navigating the world of prom, which was certainly not earth-shattering by any means, I just wanted to watch them!

Highlights, lowlights and quotes:

• Blair: "Serena's been in jail for 4 hours! That's longer than Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan combined!"
• Chuck: "Please, she's a socialite accused of stealing a bracelet. I doubt they're working her over with a phone book."
• Rufus still sucks. He tells Dan and Jenny that one of their best friends was just arrested at the behest of her mother, and when they ask for more information, he just yells at them to not get involved. That's helpful.
• Lily's parents had a tumultuous divorce? Then why did Cece still have her husband's suits in her house at the Hamptons? (Remember, Dan had to borrow Serena's grandpa's jacket to go to the White Party.)
• Lily's dad: "Punishing loved ones just comes much easier to some people."
• We've established that in Margaret Colin and John Shea, Blair has the coolest parents ever. Lily has some cool ones too: Larry from Weekend at Bernie's and Libby from Lost. Except Lily's parents are both acting like jerks. Not that I feel too badly for her; she was just as annoying in the '80s as she is now.
• It's only happened twice, but I'm already sick of transitioning in and out from the flashbacks. The stupid, reflective look on Lily's face as she reminisces makes me gag.
• Ha ha, Blair's looking at the scrapbook (that she supposedly hasn't looked at since she was a child).
• Blair: "Just like my scrapbook I don't remember keeping and haven't looked at since I was an early adolescent!"
• Ha ha, is Chuck sabotaging Nate and Blair's dream prom? Because that's funny.
• Lily thinks Cece's toxic? Cece? Cece's probably the least toxic woman in this whole family.
• Limited editions of the Gossip Girl books are on sale that come with posters of the cast! Wow, I'm actually kind of excited about that; what am I, 12-years-old?
• Wow, young Lily, that was an overreaction (in the immortal words of Andy Bernard)! She didn't have to yell at the kid just for bumping into her.
• My sister: "This waiter dude is trying really hard to be Ryan Lafferty."
• Dan: "I'm sorry to bother you, but I can't leave Serena one more message and still call myself a man."
• Ahh! Scary! Poor Little J was just hanging out in her room when all of a sudden the garage door wall is thrown open by Dan, who is wearing only a t-shirt and purple boxers! Which is especially odd, because in the scene immediately proceeding that one, he was fully clothed while talking to Lily on the phone. So, he apparently stripped down to go talk to his little sister. Weirdo!
• Dan: "Hey, I think I need a dress for prom."
  Jenny: "Ok, but you're going to have to wear your own shoes."
• Good Lord, young Lily is annoying! "You're totally falling in love with me right now." SHUT UP! Trust me, no one is falling in love with you! Only Rufus is stupid enough to do that, and he doesn't come along for a couple more years.
• Oh, thank God, it's Ryan Hansen (who is rocking quite the hairdo)! He's about the only one who can save this horrendous flashback, but it's a tall order.
• Blair: "I've always tried to make my life resemble the movie in my head, and tonight no effort required!"
• Blair: "We don't do prom queen. That's for suburban schools and the lame teen comedies that are set at them."
• Serena's white nail polish really held up in prison! It still looks flawless.
• Can we see a flashback into Eleanor's past now? Because I guarantee it would be a hell of a lot more interesting than this.
• Kind of cliche '80s music they're using here. It's not bad; it's just exactly what everyone would think of when they think '80s music: "I Melt With You," "The Safety Dance," etc.
• Blair: "Well, I just spent 10 seconds talking to you, so consider yourself repaid."
• Is that dress supposed to be Jenny's? Because that might explain why Serena's boobs are popping out of it, but I'm not really sure her boobs would have ever fit in Jenny's dress in the first place. That really is just supposed to be one of Jenny's dresses--Little J didn't just sew that one up in a half hour, right? Because not even Jenny can sew that fast.
• Wow, everyone else must have gotten tired of Lily's "remembering face" too, because now they're not using any kind of transitions from past to present at all.
• Hey, shocker, the young Mr. van der Woodsen is a jerk.
• The part where Owen throws Lily's "Your falling in love with me," line back at her would have been funny if the whole thing (namely the acting in this scene) wasn't so painful.
• Eew, Carol slept with Lily's future husband? Yuck.
• Can we please get back to Blair and Chuck's scintillating conversation about the prom queen?
• Nice punch, Ryan Hansen! He learned that move during the battles between Logan's rich kids and Weevil's motorcycle gang in Veronica Mars season 2.
• Blair: "This is my moment! I own prom!"
• Dan: "Who even voted for her?"

  Chuck: "Me. About 150 times."
• Oh. My. God. Chuck's "sabotage" turned out to be him ensuring that Blair's prom night was perfect and just like her scrapbook. Awwwwwwwwwwwwww, Chuck!!!
• Cece would rather have twenty Dan Humphreys from Brooklyn than that one stupid guy from the Valley? I mean, that dude was no prize, but Dan can be all kinds of annoying at times. I can only imagine how grating twenty Dans would be.
• Ugh, I can't even listen to Lily and Cece have this fight. It's too boring.
• Nate is awfully complacent. Blair wants him: he's ok with that. Blair doesn't want him: he's ok with that too apparently.
• Blair: "Your quasi half-brother slash ex-boyfriend was your date."
• Serena: "We went through it together. We raised each other. You're my sister."
• The "we raised each other" sentiment is sweet, but it's also extremely true and explains a lot about B and S.
• BTW, while she's "raising" Blair, couldn't Serena mention that Chuck told her he loves Blair and that he went to extremely lengths to give her a perfect prom night?
• Next week: Blair says to Chuck--for the hundredth time--"Tell me you love me," and, darn it, if he doesn't just say it this time, I'm going to eat my right hand! Lol. Maybe not. But I will be severely angered.
• I do wonder what is happening with Georgie and Poppy.
• Let's hope that this year's GG finale is a little less manic and whip-lash inducing than last season's finale. Pick your story lines wisely and let them breathe a little, GG.

(photo: cwtv.com; I am refusing to post a photo from the flashback out of principle.)

Premiere Week '08: The Office

The Office:

"Weight Loss"

How sweet was Jim's rest stop proposal to Pam (complete with quite the hot kiss)? It's a testiment to this show that it can offer up some of the funniest material on television one minute and then conjure up a scene of real, genuine emotion the next. And its sweetness is never forced or heavy-handed (like Ugly Betty's premiere episode was).

This wasn't the funniest episode of The Office ever ("The Injury"), but it still had plenty of great moments:

• Ha! They're purposely eating lots of food before the contest starts so that they'll have more weight to lose.
• Jim can't believe that Michael doesn't say "That's what she said" after Dwight said "Hold it in your mouth if you can't swallow."
• Wow! Look at young Stanley!
• For an HR rep, Holly's not very politically correct, what with her lesbian jokes and all.
• I love that Holly still thought that Kevin was mentally challenged and got all upset when Angela called him an idiot.
• Michael: "Do you know what the number 1 cause of death in this country is?"
  Dwight: "Shotgun weddings."
• Jim: "Beer me five!" (That was a blast from the past.)
• Angela demanding to get married in a 1,000-year-old church in the continental United States.
• Andy is being soooooooooooooo sweet to Angela. Why? Why? Why?
• Kelly: "I swallowed a tapeworm last night."
• Ryan! I thought he was in jail. Ahahaha! He's the new receptionist!
• Jim's insistance on pointing out that Ryan's new-found devotion to community service is court-mandated.
• Andy: "This is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I haven't had a very hard life!"
• Ryan: "I wanted to saw I'm sorry for how I treated you the past two years. I was in my mid-20s...I don't think I ever really processed 9/11..."
• Oh no, the guy from Mad Men is kind of adorable... Don't stray, Pammy!
• Oscar and Dwight doing the Michael Klump impression too.
• Michael: "What makes her beautiful?"
  Ryan: "Everything. She's perfect." (I have never heard Ryan say anything so sweet!)
• Andy: "Andy Bernard does not lose contests--he wins them...or quits them because they're unfair."
• Oh no--Angela not accepting Andy's college a capella group performing at the wedding is a deal breaker!
• Stanley: "I'm going to take five days off anyway."
• Gasp! Toby! He broke his neck! Oh nooooo, poor Toby! He just can't catch a break.

Premiere Rating: 7.0/10

(photo: nbc.com)

100th Post! (And Happy Birthday!)

Happy 100th post to me. In honor of my own birthday a few weeks ago, I was planning to do a post on good birthday-themed TV episodes, but I never got around to it. However, I think it kind of applies to the blog's 100th post anniversary in that it's some sort of milestone, so I'll give it a whirl now. Plus, December birthdays always get overshadowed by the holiday season, so here's something a little special for all the people with December b-days. (And, yes, I realize that the chances of one of the 1.7 people who occasionally read this blog actually having a December birthday are not good, but oh well.)



Best Birthday TV Episodes:

• Rory turns 16, Gilmore Girls, season 1: Rory's b-day causes a stir among the Gilmore generations (what doesn't?) when she doesn't appreciate the snooty party Emily throws her. All is tenuously patched up though when Richard and Emily agree to attend Rory's Stars Hollow party...even thought Lorelai accidentally yells, "Get your ass in here!" at them.
• Michelle turns 3, Full House, season 3: It sure seemed like Michelle Tanner had a lot of birthdays (the sun sure seemed to shine on that child), especially since I can't remember Stephanie having any. Hmm. That's a topic for another time, I guess. Anyway, my favorite Michelle b-day was when she, Steph and Uncle Jesse accidentally get locked in a gas station on the day of her party. Things initially look dire, but Jesse and Steph dress like clowns, do a sock puppet routine and juggle, so everything turns out awesome.
• Caleb turns ??, The OC, season 1: Ok, I can't make a complication list without including something from The OC, but I sure wasn't going to include the season 3 ep where Ryan turns 18. Anything that seeped in (dead) Johnny, Sadie and Volchok will never find a place on any Best Of... list of mine. The season 1 ep where we meet Caleb for the first time, however, was great, even though it threw a big monkey wrench (in the form of Caleb's hot and very young girlfriend) into the blossoming Ryan/Marissa love affair. Episode highlights include some freaky foreshadowing about Sandy and Kirstin moving back to Berkeley, the obligatory witty banter, the first mention of the "I Wish I Was a Mermaid" poem and Seth and Summer's first kiss.
• Michael turns ??, The Office, season 2: Michael is never good at sharing the spotlight, especially on his birthday, so things go awry when Kevin has a skin cancer scare on Michael's big day. The episode features a trip to the skating rink, Dwight playing a Billy Joel song on a recorder (ugh), a Pam and Jim shopping trip and lots of funny quotes, including my favorite:

Michael: When I was seven, my mother hired a pony and a cart to come to my house for all the kids. And... I got a really bad rash. From the pony. And all the kids got to ride the pony. And I had to go inside, and my mother was rubbing cream on me, for probably three hours, and I never came outside. And by the time I came out, the pony was already in the truck and around the corner. So that was my worst birthday.

• George Michael turns 16, Arrested Development, season 3: I can't remember how much of GM's b-day is even really in the "Mr. F" episode, but I'm including it on the list because of this hilarious exchange:

Michael: Besides I already got George Michael the big present for his birthday...
George Michael: A suit! Dad, is it Jack Welch?
Michael: I want you to look under the pants.
George Michael: Quicken! Premiere! Dad, I hope you kept the receipt.
Michael: You want to return that?
George Michael: What? No, I want to deduct it!

• Fiona turns 21, Shameless, series 1: In the midst of a tearful scene in which he and Fiona profess their devotion to each other, Steve nearly gets carted away to prison when Tony busts him on his car thieving. Steve thankfully manages to talk his way out of the situation (as he usually can), and surprises birthday-girl Fiona by buying the house next door (and promptly blowing it up for the insurance money). Other highlights: Frank fakes his death, Monica and Norma make an appearance (until the kids kick them out) and Sheila's pregnant.

DMI: Click to support Medicine Hat!

Please click on the banner to find out more about Dunder Mifflin Infinity and to support the fantastic Medicine Hat, Alberta, Canada branch!

Thursday TV: Werewolf Bar Mitzvah, ABBA, etc.

Highlights from another funny night of Thursday television:
Ugly Betty:
Season 2, Episode 3

Amanda maintained that that if she and Daniel are half-siblings, them having sex was only wrong half of the time.

Stressed-out Henry yelled at Mark and Amanda, garnering an unintended response:
Amanda:"Did he just get really hot?"
Marc:"I've never been more attracted to someone in my whole life."

Daniel tried teaching Justin to play basketball: "Ok, let's try again. Maybe lose the bracelets, I don't know."


The Office: "Launch Party"
I enjoyed the group's avid interest in seeing whether the little box that moves around in the screen saver ever actually goes into the corner of the screen. I've definitely watched for that before too.

And, there's something so right in the world when Andy Bernard sings ABBA (with back-up singers via speakerphone no less). Angela should lock that down ;-)


30 rock: "Jack Gets in the Game"
Jack: "Oh, come on, what are we, back at college freshman year? Let's go to the common room and talk about Apartheid."

The Best Tracy Moment is a tie between his belief that his vanity license plate, "ICU81MI," is "hilarious," and the clip from his novelty party song, "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah" (ha ha, "boys becoming men / men becoming wolves!").

Liz was also great in this episode, with: "You can't be a real women in this country. It's like those dove commercials never happened!" and defending Jenna's talent, saying, "This woman was a Mouseketeer, ma'am."

Thursday Recap

Ugly Betty:
Another good episode. The best part was when Wilhelmina confronted Betty on the roof and Mark was making thunder noise with the metal sheet. Ha!

Other highlights:

• Mark: "Yeah, yeah, and I wish I knew Marlon Brando before he was fat." (Me too.)
• Christina: "Ten bucks says there's a coat in there made of dalmatian puppies."
• Since when does Bradford attend the Luke Danes School of Postponing Your Wedding To Reconnect with Your Long-Lost Daughter?

The Office: "Dunder Mifflin Infinity"
I loved this episode even more than last week's! I take back what I said about hour-long episodes of The Office...I enjoyed every second of this one. So many highlights:

• Can't believe Toby spilled the beans on Jim and Pam. He's so vengeful ;-)
• Dwight: "I don't see it. I think they both could do better."
• Michael: "All grown up and no place to go."
• Jim and Pam are still way too cute to stand. Air high-fives for crying out loud!
• Phyllis: "I couldn't see your hands."
• Jan and Ryan's little showdown. (Jan: "I love the beard; keep it forever.")
• Kelly telling Ryan she's pregnant. Ohhh, Kelly...
• Mr. Dunder is Uncle Mickey from DooL! Ha, and Mr. Mifflin killed himself.
• Michael and Dwight driving into the lake was hilarious! Dwight: "It can't mean that! That's a lake! There's no road here!"
• Ryan asking Pam out, saying, "Wear something nice." Pam turning him down and Jim's little wave when they were talking about him.
• Michael: "WHERE ARE THE TURLES?!"
• Michael: "I drove into a [bleeping] lake! Why? Because a machine told me to. A machine told me to drive in a lake and I did it."

Grey's Anatomy:
This episode was decidedly better than last week's premiere. There were, after all, no deer for Izzie to defibrillate.

I thought that the crystal meth baby storyline was particularly affecting, especially because it allowed us to see Alex Karev, champion of all babies, back in action. I hope that Grey's doesn't forget that he was heading toward switching his specialty from plastics to neonatal surgeries. Unfortunately, that storyline, which I really liked, becomes a lot less manageable now that Addison is gone. Anyway, I thought he did a great job diagnosing what was wrong with the baby, although I wonder how he knew what crystal meth smells like. And, dare I say it, I might be coming around to the horrendous facial hair.

It was also nice to see that Marissa Cooper's yard boy is still finding work. I thought his performance as the "I'm not that guy" drug addict was very good. I never cease to be astounded when "D.J." shows up on other things and is actually a pretty good actor, because those scenes between him and Mischa were freaking painful on The O.C.

And, I'd be remiss to not celebrate the guest appearance of Ben Vereen, whom I have loved since I was about two years old and an avid fan of Zoobilee Zoo.

What irked me (and only me, from what I can tell from reading critics and other blogs) was Mama Burke's omniscient observations about everyone who stopped to talk to her. First of all, she was out of line dressing down Meredith for what she said when announcing that Burke and Christina's wedding was off. Look, lady, if your son leaves his fiancee at the alter when the whole wedding was completely his idea, then he has coming to him whatever her best friend feels like saying. And I was also bothered that she seemed to instantly ascertain Derek and George's romantic situations...especially since I'm still not entirely sure what their problems are.

Premiere Watch '07: 30 Rock

A few weeks after its fantastic 1st season won the Emmy for Best Comedy, 30 Rock picked up right where it left off last year. The second season opener featured a guest appearance by Jerry Seinfeld, and if his appearance on the show can help to hook more viewers on 30 Rock, that will be a victory for us all.

30 Rock's strength is that, like The Office and Arrested Development, it has a great cast of kooky characters with very well-defined niches. Tina Fey is one of my heroes, I've previously documented my unnatural love for Tracy Morgan, Kenneth and Jenna are both perfect for what they are, and Alec Baldwin could not nail this role any harder.

My favorite Tracy moment of episode 1 was when he was explaining how he likes to help transvestite prostitutes better their lives (encouraging them to go to computer school, study to be a court reporter, etc.).

Best line: "You can be a freaky-deeky and still do data entry!"

In a season when several pilots (Big Shots, Dirty Sexy Money) are squeezing all the sleazy jokes they can out of transvestite hookers, it was wildly refreshing to see 30 Rock take the whole theme in an entirely different direction. Thank you, Tina Fey et. al., for having a fresh voice.

Other highlights:

• I enjoyed the computerized Jerry Seinfeld guest appearances in all NBC shows. It seems like everyone else has ended up in Heroes anyway, so why not him?
• Jack: "She needs to lose 30 pounds or gain 60. Anything in between has no place on television." (What's frightening is that, if you think about it, he's completely right.)
• Kenneth was so cute grinning at Jerry Seinfeld.
• Tracy: "Ask my wife if she's sleeping with D.L. Hughley." (Hmm, I'm thinking that this isn't a random mention since D.L. was on NBC's other 'sketch show' show Studio 60.)
• Jack: "Ha ha! You're going to buy NBC! Like you have $4 million just lying around..." (Ouch.)
• Jack: "There are no bad ideas in brainstorming, Lemon."
• Liz sounds like Jerry Seinfeld when she cries.
• Tracy (when he sees Liz in the white wedding dress): "Oh no! Did a Korean person die?"

This episode was a promising start to season 2. As far as I'm concerned, Tina Fey can take over the world.

Premiere Rating: 8 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: The Office

I love The Office. I absolutely love it. And I'm glad to have it back. The Season 4 premiere started out with quite a bang! Meredith came out of nowhere! And the camera shot of her flying onto the windshield was fantastically done. Luckily, she turned out to be okay, although you wouldn't necessarily know that from hearing Michael's account, during which he was channeling the Arrested Development's hyper-literal doctor.

But, the night's big news: Jam is finally officially happening. Hallelujah! We've suspected for years that they're perfect for each other, and, wow, were we right! Could they be any cuter together? And the other question is: when are we going to start hating them for being so cute and perfect? I sure don't hate them yet. Give me more Jam!

New Pammy sure has become a force to be reckoned with. She guilted Angela into planning the hospital trip and forcefully told Michael that it is not okay to be naked in your office. Go Pammy! Why do I have the feeling that someday they'll all be working for her?

The closest thing to a complaint that I have is that I don't think that the hour-long episodes of The Office work quite as well as the 30 minute ones. It's hard for anything to be consistently hilarious for a whole hour. That said, I will gladly take every second of The Office that they are willing to give me.

Highlights:

• Kevin saying that Jim and Pam go together like peanut butter and jelly. Um, did he perhaps mean "peanut butter and JAM"?
• Michael: "Yeah, it's only Meredith. Thank God."
• Michael's whole conversation with Ryan, including his admission that he was being negligent and his misunderstanding of "double jeopardy."
• Michael: "I have flaws. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. I occasionally hit people with my car."
• Michael: "I'm not superstitious. I'm only a little stitious."
• Poor Sprinkles! I can't believe Dwight shut her in the freezer.
• Stanley, Oscar, and Creed starting the race and then taking a taxi to a bar.
• Michael's idea to carbo-load with fettuccine alfredo and not drink any water before the 5K.

Premiere Rating: 8 / 10

Premiere Watch '07: Heroes

Hmm, I had a joke all prepared for tonight's episode of Heroes. I was going to say:

"Well, at least it was better than last year's finale...but, well, that's not saying much. Heck, today's episode of Days of Our Lives was better than last year's finale."

But, here we run into a problem: was tonight's episode better than last year's finale? And were either of them better than today's Days of Our Lives? Luckily for Heroes, today's DOOL was pretty darn bad.

Here are my two main complaints about Heroes (tonight, and in general, I suppose):

There is no dramatic structure to an episode of Heroes. It starts plotlines for 10 different people, then furthers them a little bit, then, instead of providing any sort of conclusion, it just starts plotlines for 5 other people and calls it a night. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

And it's sooooooo over-dramatic! Like, could Ando's facial expressions be any more over the top when Hiro's dad fell off the roof? Umm, yep, they could have been Peter's facial expressions when he found himself chained up in the Irish truck. Come the heck on, people! Tone it down a bit; you're not in a silent movie for crying out loud. And those Latino twins...oy vey. The scene of them talking while hiding in the doorway almost made me barf.

My praises for tonight's Heroes:

Well, they begin and end with David Anders. Wow, he's hot. Even when they make him wear that ridiculous Japanese feudal warrior outfit. It takes one hot boy to rock that outfit and not look completely ridiculous. I was extremely glad when Kensei and Hiro realized they both spoke English, because I was having a hard time keeping up with their rapid-fire Japanese while being horribly distracted by David's beauty. And I was also glad to have my favorite beautiful British rogue criminal back (well, kind of anyway). What I was not totally getting was why they decided to have Kensei turn into Jack Sparrow, but whatev. It could be worse, and it lead to by far the best moment of the night (and possibly the entire Heroes series) when:

David punched Hiro in the face!!!! Oh my gosh, I've been waiting so long for someone to punch Hiro in the face just to shut him up for a while. His constant cheerfulness has become so grating... Thank you, Kensei!

Other observations:

• Nathan's politician hair is ridiculous. Oops, I spoke too soon. His politician hair was no where near as bad as his new hairdo and beard! Yikes. He looks like the uni-bomber.
• Yeah, I wouldn't go hear Mohinder give a lecture either...
• Sorry, folks, Grunberg is still not badass. Elaborate NYPD training exercise they've got there, what with the immediate fake blood, etc. Umm, if all the "hostages" and "captors" were acting, wouldn't they both be thinking, "I'm acting"?
• Claire's grades are going to suffer if she can't raise her hand in class. Some teachers give a class participation grade. Not talking is going to make her stand out for being the weird blonde who never talks.
• Ando's hair is pretty awesome today.
• Great, a weird, recurring symbol. Because we so loved that on Alias and Kyle XY.
• Someone is taking out the older generation. That's fine by me. I can actually recommend some characters from the younger generations that I could do without too.
• Think there's any way that Mr. Bennet's career in the paper business can lead to a cross-over episode with Dunder Mifflin and The Office?
• Ha, the guy from "the company" who was on Dweebs (wow, that's a random reference) has the Midas touch! That's a fun power.
• He he. Grunberg's scared of a little girl. Like I said, he's so not badass.
• Oh, great, these Spanish-speaking kids mean more subtitles to read...fantastic.
• Where is the teacher supervision during Claire's gym class? And why didn't she put her hair in a pony tail to play badminton?
• There are 9 first generation people left. Ugh, this plotline is going to take forever.
• Maya's power is making people bleed out their eyes? That one sucks.
• Hunter from The Office a.k.a. "James Van Der Beek" a.k.a. West (seriously?) can fly. That's cool. I bet he could do a back tuck off that platform without hurting himself. My sister wonders if he's related to flying Nathan, and thus related to Claire. Wouldn't it be fantastic is Claire fell in love with another one of her relatives every season?
• Ok, it's official: no one in Hollywood can do an Irish accent without sounding ridiculous. At least no one on Heroes or Days of Our Lives anyway. I have no idea what just went on in that last scene but I was too distracted by trying to figure out why that one guy looked so familiar and by the accents (the one guy said "turd" instead of "third"....just saying).

Premiere Rating: 5.5* / 10

* 5 of those 5.5 points are for David Anders being ridiculously hot, which Heroes has nothing to do with. I'd give it a 10 just for David, but I don't think that's fair, so I'm setting the maximum number of points that any one actor can earn for a show at 5. Interestingly, if Kristen Bell had been in this episode, she could have earned it another 5 points and Heroes would have gotten a 10 despite being kind of a crappy hour of television.

Premiere Watch '07: Chuck

Well, Chuck was the second Josh Schwartz pilot to debut this fall (read my take on Gossip Girl here), and--not surprisingly--it was pretty darn good too. Chuck is certainly less likely of the two to garner comparisons to The OC, but, for the record, there were several fights, a party, and a trip to a Bait Shop-esque club.

Anyway, Chuck was delightful. Namely because of, well, Chuck. What's not to love about a character who is a little bit Seth Cohen, a little bit Jim Halpert, and a little bit Ed Stevens? That's a pretty unbeatable combination in my book (see? I still subconsciously quote The OC).

But, here again, Josh has created another "nerd" or "outsider" that is just too darn adorable to be a nerd or outsider (just like Dan from Gossip Girl). I was beside myself to understand why Chuck doesn't have women lined up around the block to go out with him--his date behavior was so cute. I suppose the secret to Chuck's isolation is that he never puts himself out in the world, as he still hasn't recovered from his college girlfriend dumping him for his roommate Bryce. (Speaking of the college girlfriend, can that please be who Rachel Bilson is going to play when she shows up for a multi-episode arc? That would be fantastic!)

Of course, the premise of the show is that Chuck accidentally absorbs all of the government's intelligence secrets into his head and unwittingly finds himself caught up in the dangerous world of spies and secret agents. The spy stuff turned out to be a lot of fun too. I loved how when Bryce was trying to escape, he did everything in the most complicated way possible (sliding under the table, going through the window above the door, etc.) ...because, seriously, how many times did Sydney Bristow make things harder on herself than she needed to? The ridiculousness continued when Sarah showed up dressed in black and was able to throw Chuck's computer in the air, beat everyone up, and still easily catch the computer. I guess the CIA has begun to recruit rhythmic gymnasts.

Another way Chuck spoofed previous spy shows was in having all the intelligence people speak in as many hard-boiled cliches as possible. This was really funny at first, but my concern is that the agents may have been a little too cliched. It looks like Sarah is well on her way to sprouting more of a personality (since we saw that Bryce was her boyfriend), and I hope that at least some of the other intel people become a bit more multifaceted.

Random question: do NSA agents really run around killing CIA agents willy-nilly? That seems kind of wrong. And is Sarah even allowed to be doing any of this spy stuff in the U.S. because my understanding was the the CIA can only operate outside of our borders? And why did Bryce clandestinely download his own government's secrets? Didn't the CIA already know that stuff? Ok, I realize that hardcore fans will tolerate some loose-ends when watching spy shows (see Rambaldi's "endgame"), but Chuck should maybe make more of an effort to not lose us all right off the bat.

Like The OC, much of the charm of Chuck is in the little witty comments, such as:

• Chuck: "Pedal safe!"
• Harry: "Do you know what 5 minutes is in Buy More dollars?"
  Chuck: "I didn't know we had our own currency."
• Chuck to the 'ninji' robbing his house: "Please, not the computer!"
• Chuck's coworker hypothesizing that the break in might be some sort of "ninji vendetta" and Chuck's response: "That's super. Thanks for thinking outside of the box on that one."
• Chuck asking the LargeMart employee to get "the guy at the front who's checking receipts" to come help. (I hate it when they do that at Circuit City!)
• CIA guy: "Nice guys aren't sent government secrets."
• NSA guy: "Don't puke on the C4."

And my other favorite parts and random observations:

• Was that the clip of Ryan carrying Marissa after her overdose in Tijuana in there amongst the other pictures encoded with government secrets? It sure looked like them. Does that mean that we were absorbing dangerous secrets while watching The OC? Because if it does, I'm in trouble.
• I loved that Chuck calls his sister's boyfriend "Captain Awesome."
• Is Agent Scardino (from Lois & Clark) Josh Schwartz's new best friend or something? First he showed up in The OC finale, and now he's the dad who didn't tape his daughter's ballet recital on Chuck. He's become the Greg Grunberg to Josh's J.J. Abrams!
• How smart was Chuck to use the porn site virus to crash the computer hooked up to the bomb! See, nerds make good CIA agents.
• The episode featured some good music: "Cobrastyle" by the Teddybears and then The Shins.

Premiere Rating: 8.0 / 10

(image from nbc.com)

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (a.k.a. It's a Man's World)

Mad Men:

Hmm. Well, I've be reading and hearing such great things about AMC's first original series Mad Men that I was pretty excited to check it out tonight. And I don't know. It was very well made--the periodness was impeccable and the cinematography was lovely. But the whole thing just didn't suck me in as much as it apparently should have. I don't know. Could it be that watching people brainstorm about advertising campaigns just isn't the most exciting thing in the world? And that it's still not particularly interesting even if you make them all chauvinist jerks?

I guess considering all the hype, I was expecting the pilot to jump out of the screen and grab me, and it didn't. Watching it wasn't particularly enjoyable. I don't think I liked any of the characters and they weren't really the kind of "psychotic jackasses" that you love to hate either. Oh, and as soon as Dennis Martino/Gaby's mayor husband shows up in something, that's a huge strike in my book.

The big development at the end that the main guy had a wife and kids was not particularly surprising. And they were sure hitting the fact that the one guy was closeted and gay really, really hard. I would imagine that one would be better at hiding things like that if one lived in such an intolerant society. He was being so obvious that the other characters just looked stupid for not picking up on it. And women weren't considered equals and treated like crap. Ok, we get it.

I did want to like it. There were some good things: There were some moderately funny parts. (However, the "Freud, you say? What agency does he work for?" line would have been soooo much funnier if delivered in a Veronica Mars-like manner.) It was like a history lesson (wait, is that good or bad?). The opening credits were nice. The slutty secretary in the green dress had pretty hair.

Yep. That's all I got.

While I was watching it, I wished I was watching the Men In Trees rerun. Does that mean I'm shallow? Or does it just mean that I don't hate women? Or does it mean that John Tupper is just way hotter than all Mad Men's guys with suits and slicked back hair combined?

30 Rock:

Hahahahaha. The receptionist girl wants to name her baby "Bookcase."

The Office:

I love that even Michael Scott came to the conclusion that Ben Franklin is "kind of a sleaze-bag." That's what I've always thought.

The Best of the 2006-2007 TV Season!!!

Most Shocking Moments:
"Through the Looking Glass" Lost -- We find out that Jack and Kate both make it off the island in a "game-changing" flash forward.

"In or Out" Ugly Betty -- The mysterious veiled figure is revealed to be not Fey Sommers as expected, but Alex Meade, post gender reassignment surgery!

Funniest Moments:
"The Return" The Office -- Jim and Pam hide Andy's cell phone in the ceiling, causing him to freak out and punch the wall. "That.....was an over-reaction." Yes, Andy Bernard, but it was a hilarious over-reaction.

"Beach Games" The Office -- Andy Bernard falls into the river wearing a blow-up sumo wrestling suit and floats away. Physical comedy at it's best.

"Gay Witch Hunt" The Office -- In the season three pilot, we see a quick flash of Roy's DUI mugshot... and he's a huge mess.

"Swag" Ugly Betty -- When Bradford finds out that Wilhelmina has been charging personal expenses to the magazine like, say, her "butt lift," she responds, "Well, good luck returning my ass!"

Funniest Characters:
Andy Bernard, The Office -- He's just a Cornell graduate trying to take over the world using three sure-fire tactics: name repetition, personality mirroring, and never breaking off a hand shake. As he is responsible for two of my Funniest Moments of the season, it doesn't take a degree from Cornell to conclude that Andy belongs in this category.

Tracy Jordan, 30 Rock -- I have an unnatural love for Tracy Morgan. Everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious, including: his belief that vampires are the best golfers but we'll never know it, his admission that he steals dogs and does the robot backwards into Starbucks, his discovery of anagrams, and "the manatee becomes the mentor."

Justin and Marc, Ugly Betty -- Both the youth who loves jazz hands and the cattiest personal assistant at Mode stole every scene they were in this season.

Dick Casablancas, Veronica Mars -- It's funny. In college I came across literally hundreds (perhaps thousands) of boys who act just like Dick Casablancas and couldn't stand them at all. Yet I love this guy. I love how he's an unapologetic himbo and always ready and willing to say something wildly inappropriate. How amusing people like this are when you personally don't have to deal with them.

Best Performances in a Drama:
Ellen Pompeo, Grey's Anatomy -- Although her acting chops aren't usually the ones people mention when talking Grey's, Ellen really brought it this season. She was especially fantastic in the episode where Ellis miraculously becomes lucid. Watching the look on Meredith face when her mother complains that she's ordinary is like getting kicked in the stomach and Pompeo nailed the confrontational speech and subsequent realization that her mother's Alzheimer's is back. And, showing her range, pre-appendectomy drugged-up Meredith was a riot early in the season and a breath of fresh air in the over-drama that was the third season of Grey's.

T.R. Knight, Grey's Anatomy -- T.R. may not have had the best material to work with this season (even though he leveraged his gayness to get better plots according to Crazy Isaiah Story #3), but he absolutely nailed what he got. His ability to thrive in the extremely drawn-out story line about Burke's hand and the torturous Gizzie scenes proves his value to this show.

Sally Field, Brothers and Sisters -- We like her! We really, really like her! Sally was spot-on throughout the season as Nora, the glue that held the Walkers and this show together. She excelled in both the dramatic moments of dealing with her late-husband's infidelity (the late-night swim comes to mind) and the comedic moments (like the food fight with the mistress) that were my favorite part of the show.

Best Episodes:
"Spit and Eggs" Veronica Mars -- Veronica solves the case and quickly becomes the target of the psycho-villain. It's a cliche on this show for a reason. Making this time even more exciting, Veronica ran frantically down a hallway to dance music, a la vintage Alias. If only all rapists got stabbed by a unicorn horn. Add a crazy Piznarski dance, Wallace talking about "pity balloons," some classic Mac, and Logan smashing a cop car to get in jail to beat the living daylights out of Mercer and you've got one of the best hours of TV this year.

"The Bitch is Back" Veronica Mars -- "After all these years, do you not instinctively fear me?" Veronica asks, and if we didn't, we sure do now. Do not mess with V. In the series' last ep, Veronica goes after the people who posted a sex tape of her on the web, and with friends like Wallace, Weevil, and Logan to mess up cars, go undercover into secret societies, and punch mobsters, she's going to take the bad guys down. And don't forget Keith, whose attempt to cover for his daughter results in the two of them becoming the outcasts they were when the series began. That's called coming full circle, kids, but it's a shame that the CW canceled this amazing show with so much story left to tell.

"Through the Looking Glass" Lost -- It's a flash forward! Whoa! And even though Future Jack seems even more depressed that Present Jack and Past Jack, this episode was one of the best of the year thanks to Sayid snapping an Other's neck with his feet, Hurley and his van saving the day, Sawyer avenging Walt, Charlie's Alias Season 1 finale-esque drowning, the obscured newspaper clipping, the funeral parlor anagram, the mystery man in the coffin, and Kate and Jack's clandestine meeting. Oh, the Alice in Wonderland reference in the episode title is pretty darn cool too.

"Company Man" Heroes -- Heroes really found its stride in this episode, narrowing its focus to the events taking place in the Bennet house as several heroes clash together. Some Lost-style story telling gives us new insights into Noah Bennet's character and he has the Haitian erase his memory to protect Claire Bear.

"The End's Not Near, It's Here" The O.C. -- I've said it before, and I'll say it again: The O.C. rocked it's series finale. The saying good-bye to the Cohen house, the Seth/Ryan hug, the new baby Cohen, the new old house in Berkeley, the few acknowledgements that Marissa Cooper existed and that we loved her, the Julie Cooper college graduation, the Seth/Summer wedding, and the architect Ryan helping out a kid all combined for the perfect ending to one of the coolest shows ever.

Best New Shows:
Heroes, Men In Trees, 30 Rock

Best Comedy:
The Office

Exposing the man-"chut"

Kyle XY:
Hmm, well, that was one dramatic scene in the caf during lunch time. Poor Amanda. Too bad she didn't have the presence of mind try to move Charlie's humiliation of her into the hallway where there were fewer people watching. And poor Kyle. She was just as hard on him as she was on Cheater Charlie. No matter what she may say though, I really think that Amanda would not have taken it well if Kyle had told her about Charlie. She probably wouldn't have even believed him. But major props to Lori's friend for telling Amanda the truth about her affair with Charlie. That showed maturity and guts. And I loved that Charlie was voted Biggest Slut--it's good that although Amanda was in the dark, everyone else caught on to his man-whore tendencies.

And the other big revelation is that Kyle has now accepted his destiny to save the world (how Clark Kent/Peter Petrelli of him). I felt a little bad for him when Foss turned all Marta Karolyi on his butt with the constant demands to hone his abilities through bizarre exercises. But, come on, Kyle, if Pam Beasley can walk on hot coals, surely you can too.

Monday's Blatant Sour Patch Kids Product Placement was especially silly. Nicole just wanders around the party handing out Sour Patch Kids? No wonder Kyle likes living with her--she follows him around handing out candy!

And the scene with Kyle and Lori in her bedroom seemed a little hotter than it should have been. I'm still holding out hope for a Loryle hook-up, but now that he's officially part of the Trager family, I guess it would seem a little too incestuous.

BTW, I love Lori's IKEA quilt cover. Her bedding is almost as nice as that of Johnny on Hidden Palms (who is a fabulous interior decorator apparently).

This show is filmed in Canada, right? The boys' bathroom was labeled "boys washroom," which seems like a bit of a lingo slip up.

Funny highlights:

Lori: She was voted Biggest Sl... four-letter world that rhymes with "chut."

Charlie: Don't pull this innocent star-gazer crap with me!

John Krasinski rocks my world

John Krasinski's appearance on Conan last week was quite possibley the funniest talk show interview I've ever seen. Thank goodness some kind person posted this on YouTube, because I missed it "live" due to being drained from my early trip to NYC. Seriously, though, my life is better for having seen this clip. Tears were streaming down my face. John is hilarious--he tells not one, not two, but three hysterical stories. Fair warning: the story about the girl in the bar just might be the funniest thing ever.

Incidentally, John telling stories about himself is about 1000 times funnier than any of the clips I've seen from License to Wed.

Season Finales, Season Finales Everywhere!

Grey's Anatomy:
Wow. This sure was one depressing hour and fifteen minutes. Where along the line did the people at Grey's get the impression that in order for a season finale to be good, horrible things must happen to all of the characters. Seriously, not a single person escaped this monsoon of badness. They might as well have had all the characters stand in a row and have people throw things at them :-)

Burke, Steamy, and Addison didn't get the chief job (and they all kind of got insulted in the process); George failed his test; Bailey didn't get chief resident; Alex realized his love for Ava about a half hour too late; George snubbed Izzy (yet again. Get some self respect, Izz); Derek and Meredith careened toward a break-up for no real discernible reason; Burke didn't marry Christina and disappeared; Adele lost her baby.

Actually, about the happiest thing that happened was that Adele losing the baby brought her and Chief Richard back together again...and miscarriages are not happy, folks. And those hikers...why were they even still around? And, better question, why was Derek interrogating them instead of the police? I love that his holier-than-thou attitude now qualifies him to be a detective. Can you tell that the doctor formerly known as McDreamy is on my last nerve?

Oh! Oh! Oh! I almost forgot about him telling Meredith that she should be worried that his flirtation with Bar Slut/Reunion girl/Mere's little sister was the highlight of his week! It is such a shame that Meredith was so wrapped up with the death of her stepmom, her best friend's wedding, and the most important test of her internship that she neglected her duty to entertain Derek! Poor, poor Derek. Perhaps Meredith should hire a clown to follow him around and keep him amused.

And speaking of whiny, middle-aged men....Burke does not get to leave Christina at the alter! The whole thing was his freakin idea!

One more thing that I didn't like about the episode was that the scene where Christina freaks out in her wedding dress looked exactly like Carrie Bradshaw's SATC wedding-dress-inspired panic attack.

Another thing that sucked was that the National Inquirer or whoever published all those Grey's spoilers turned out to be alarmingly accurate... so none of this crappy stuff was even a surprise.

Oh well, let's just hope that next season is better.

The Office:
Jam is on!!!!!!! Does anything else matter?

It's been days and I'm still glowing about "Pam, are you free for dinner tonight?" It's about freaking time, Halpert and Beasley. Now, let's just hope that next season we don't back track on the Jam like we did this year. I mean, honestly I thought Jam was on last year after the hot-office-Casino-Night kiss, but it clearly was not. This time, let's hope it sticks. I do feel a bit for Karen, but clearly Jim and Pam are made for each other...and Scranton (ouch, that part sounds like an insult). And Karen could be a bit of a jerk (telling Jim his hair made him look homeless, ordering Pam to photocopy their sales reports).

Poor Michael. Now he's stuck with crazy unemployed Jan living in his condo. Seriously, though, was Jan always this nuts and we just didn't realize it because she wasn't around that often and compared to Michael, no one is crazy? Or is it new? Because I never realized she was this deranged. I mean, dating Michael was certainly a tip off to some sort of mental instability...

And how cool was the "game changer"? (I love that The Office has stolen that terminology from the overly self-important Losties.) Ryan the temp is in charge! Good for him. See, getting that MBA does pay off.

And, of course, the episode was funny:

• Dwight's reign of terror, complete with soil lectures and "Schrute Bucks" (and now, thankfully, we know that the correct ratio of Schrute Bucks to Stanley Nickels is the same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns).
• Pam getting to be the secret Assistant to the Regional Manager for a morning.
• Creed's "blog" a.k.a. a word document with a URL address typed at the top.
• Michael calling his decision to take back the bigger-breasted Jan "emotionally magnificent."
• Jim wanting to see the U.N. building while in New York and saying the last time he was in the Big Apple was a sixth grade field trip. Now that is just too freaking cute.
• Andy working in a little more Cornell bragging. I'm never going to be able to take anything involving Cornell seriously again :-)
• Oh and Beasley so totally pulls her comedic weight. Her "Maybe I'll find my own Karen" monologue ending with a slightly panicked "I'm not gay!" proclamation was adorable.

But, of course, what really matters is that Jam is on! Did I mention that?

Ugly Betty:

Ok, since when does UB get its plotlines from Days of Our Lives? It kind of seemed like they wanted something big and splashy for the finale, but couldn't quite come up with anything, so just threw in every somewhat trite storyline they could think of. Did Santos really need to be shot in a random convenience store hold up? Did Amanda suddenly need to be Fey's daughter? Did Henry's ex need to be knocked up? And, um, didn't Gilmore Girls do that whole storyline in season two? And didn't they do it a heck of a lot better?

Random question: Even provided that Alexis is so stupid that she didn't realize that after putting out a hit on Bradford, his car might not be the best vehicle to use to take her brother to the hospital, why, why, why does taking Daniel from the Mode office in midtown Manhattan to a hospital require her to drive on a very twisty road through a secluded forest? Are there not hospitals in Manhattan? Because there totally are.

Extended Weekend Recap

The Office:
This episode was fantastic. Give me super-sized Office any day of the week. I could watch a 3 hour episode of The Office and not get tired of it. Heck, I would work at Dunder Mifflin if I could :-)

Highlights:

• Jim making blindfolded Karen step over imaginary "big holes" during the egg race.
• Dwight and Ryan getting into a fight during the egg race.
• Oscar's decision that he'll transfer if Dwight gets Michael's job and his boyfriend can come if he wants to, but if not, he was looking for a way to get out of that relationship anyway.
• Stanley taking Jim out during the sumo wrestling contest.
• Michael looking for someone to replace him with the charisma of "a Hope or a Bynes."
• Pam working up the guts to set Jim and everyone else straight. Good girl, Pammy!

And one of the highlights of this entire television season:

• Andy Bernard falling into the lake in his sumo outfit and floating way! Freaking hysterical. I still laugh just thinking about it. What was he even trying to do, anyway? I hope someone found him and pulled him out of the lake eventually.

Grey's Anatomy:

Thatcher is out of control. Does he really blame Meredith for this? Meredith? Not the chief or Bailey, who were the people actually in charge Susan's care? And it was real supportive of everyone else to just stand around and let him yell at Meredith, when they know he's already smacked her? Geez. Somebody help the poor girl out.

Oh, and add Derek Shepherd to the list of TV characters who need kicked in the face. Geez! Is he seriously mad at Meredith for not telling him about her test disaster? Literally, all the poor girl could do was sit in the waiting room staring straight ahead. She was not in the state to function properly--that's why she couldn't take the test in the first place! Everyone else who cares about Mere looked around the hospital for her to see how she was. Derek is incapable of that? He's acting like such a loser. Cowboy up, McDreamy, for God's sake.

Suddenly Addison's mantra of Derek "emotionally checking out" of their marriage months before she hooked up with Steamy seems to be ringing true. Also now appearing to be prophetic is McVet's warning to Meredith that Derek would hurt her again. Ugh. Bar slut/Reunion girl can have him.

Traveler:

I was so excited about this show (I've been looking forward to it for a year now) and I keep forgetting to watch my tape of it! Oops. I am glad to see that Trey Atwood in a role where he's not attacking Marissa Cooper.

Without a Trace:

Worst. Season. Finale. Ever.

Desperate Housewives:

I actually enjoyed this episode! (Well, at least the first half of it.) Yea! Susan was funny, Edie had some funny moments, and Gaby's comment that marriage to Susan might make Mike miss the coma was great. But then came the Lynette storyline. Ugh. She kind of deserved that bump on the head. Cancer, though, definitely not good. At least Bree's coming back next week! Yea!

Brothers and Sisters:

Tearjerker. Even though little William died, I think Tommy and Julia made the right choice to not having one twin's kidney transplanted into the other baby. Kidney transplants in premature babies have got to be extremely risky. This way, at least they still have Elizabeth Walker.

I think my other favorite part was Kevin taking down the guy who wanted to blackmail the Senator.

Unfortunately, there were no drunken secret-spilling scenes. Maybe next week.

Sweeps!

Television Sweeps is my favorite holiday. What other holiday is so awesome that it happens four times a year? And last night marked the beginning of May Sweeps 2007 (although yesterday was definitely still in April...I don't get it). I do tend to enjoy February Sweeps better than May Sweeps though, because with the May episodes comes the dreaded realization that these episodes are the last ones before another long, starved summer. But Sweeps are Sweeps and I'm still crazy excited!

Ugly Betty:
I honestly didn't make it the whole way through the episode yet. I watched the first half, and then took one look at Jim's Dwight impersonation and had to switch channels. It didn't help that I'm completely sick of Betty, Daniel, Hilda, Amanda, Willie, Alexis...... What I did really enjoy from last night was the flashback to Betty's anti-prom. Betty's pre-braces teeth were hysterical! They were gigantic! I laughed every time she opened her mouth--it didn't matter what she was saying.

The Office:
Jim's Dwight impersonation was fantastic. "Question! Which bear is best? False! The black bear." Oh, Jim Halpert, marry me. Please.

The first half of the episode was hilarious, especially the scene with everyone in the conference room: Pam intentionally prolonging the discussion about Michael's abbreviated speaking taking up extra time; Michael calling Ryan "sweet cheeks"; Andy's Dick-Van-Dyke-it's-a-jolly-'oliday-with-Mary-esque British accent followed by Jim's "I'm definitely going alone."

My only complaint is that I need some more Jam...as soon as possible. It's been almost a year since the kiss at Casino Night; it's time to make something happen, Beasley.

Grey's Anatomy:
"You're my penis fish." Wow. Just wow. If that doesn't become the next big TV-inspired catch-phrase, I don't know what will. It certainly could compete with, "Save the cheerleader. Save the world," by way of originality and versatility.

I do have to admit though that I am getting a little sick of how almost everyone who walks into Seattle Grace has one of the most bizarre medical conditions known to mankind. Conjoined adult twins, a pregnant man, a lady turning to stone, etc., etc., and now a penis fish? The O.C. was definitely on to something when Seth visited Seattle Grace and Dr. Roberts was called away because someone who appeared to be gorged by a unicorn was just brought in :-) Sigh. I miss The O.C.

Anyway, I realize that these medical conditions do/could actually exist, but the chances of all these people walking into the same hospital in the same city? Not good. And I find Grey's penchant for the absurd all the more unfortunate because I think that some of the most memorable and well written and acted patient stories are the more normal ones. The lady from Roseanne who was dying and gave her daughter life instructions comes to mind.

My other complaint was that this Addison stuff seemed to come on a bit fast. She had quite the day, what with finally ridding herself of Steamy, hooking up with Alex, getting 'dumped' by Alex, and deciding that she needs out of Seattle. Yikes. Very productive. Meanwhile, Christina and Burke, Izzy and George, and Meredith and Derek are all doing basically the same act they've done for weeks. Speaking of Derek, he is on my last nerve. He needs to suck it up. Yes, Meredith didn't swim, but she's changed. That's what that whole third part of the three-parter was about! He better watch it or pretty soon he'll have a new nickname like McWhiny or McMopey.

30 Rock:
Congrats to Tina Fey, etc. on finishing up a very solid first season! Tonight's episode was good--not my favorite ever though. The highlights for me were:

• Kenneth purposefully falling down the stairs so the EMTs would give Tracey a ride
• Liz and Frank (I think that's his name) asking the blond girl to dance in front of the band for like 10 minutes and then Jenna running up, saying, "I hear you're looking for people to dance in front of the band!"
• Tracey listing "having to brush your own teeth" as one of the pitfalls of not being famous
• Floyd marching the squirrel past his webcam while talking to Liz

I also found some uncomfortable similarities between the scene where Liz and Jack were yelling at Kenneth and Alec's now-legendary phone call with his daughter.

I'm bummed that Liz and Floyd are packing it in, but I guess the show is best when Liz is a romantically pathetic workaholic. And it's hard for a girl to complete with 'the Cleve'... I'm excited to see what Tina, etc. will have in store for us next season. (Yea for a good, quality show getting renewed!)